How to Text a Guy After the First Date

Co-authored by Louie Felix and Jessica Gibson

Last Updated: December 13, 2021 References

You made it through the first date, but now you're wondering what to say. Fortunately, there are no rules when it comes to messaging him! We get that it can be a little awkward since you're still getting to know each other. To help, we've listed texts you can send your guy to signal interest, move the relationship forward, or get a second date.

1

"Hey, did you make it home safely?”

Asking about his safety shows him that you're a caring person. Send this within an hour or two of your date so he has a chance to respond the same day. This thoughtful text also puts the ball in his court—he can reply with a simple, reassuring text or start a conversation about the date you just went on.^{[1]
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- If you text him right after you say goodbye to him, you might message, "Hey, could you let me know when you make it home alright?"

2

"How was the rest of your night?"

Send this message the day after your date if you're unsure how it went. The text is polite, but not too personal which is good if you're still trying to decide how you feel about the guy. Plus, it's such a general text that he can reply to it in a number of ways. Here are a few other texts that get the same point across:^{[2]
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- "I hope your day's going well. 🙂"
- "I'm pretty busy this week, but I'll let you know if things clear up."
- "How's your morning going?"

3

"I had a fantastic time with you tonight!”

This text is simple, but it lets him know that you're interested. You can send this on the same day or wait until the next day and tell him what a nice evening you had.^{[3]
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Expert Source

Louie Felix
Dating Coach & Matchmaker
Expert Interview. 5 May 2020.} Either way, it reassures him that you had a good time and the date was a success. You could also text:^{[4]
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- "I haven't enjoyed myself on a date like that in a long time!"
- "I hope you had as good a time as I did last night."
- "As first dates go, that was a good one."

4

"Thanks for last night.”

A thank you text is really polite, especially if he paid for the date. Try to send this one within a day of your date so he doesn't think you're ignoring him. It's a good, generic text to send regardless of how you feel about him. If you're interested in him, you could also add, "I really enjoyed myself," but if you're not sure how you feel, you could just say thanks for arranging the date.^{[5]
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- Sending a thank you text can also buy you some time if you haven't made up your mind about dating the guy. Maybe you want a few more text interactions before you commit to a second date and being polite can really help!

5

"Hey! How's your day? 😊"

A text like this shows him that you like him and you're thinking about him. It might not seem like an exciting text, but if he's also interested in you, he'll really appreciate it. It's also a great way to start a conversation or open the door for planning another date. You might also send a text like:^{[6]
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- "How's your morning going? 🙂"
- "I forgot to mention this last night, but you looked great."
- "I was thinking about that movie you mentioned. Is it playing around here?"

6

"Just wanted to say hi. Hi! 😘"

This communicates to him that he's on your mind. It also gets him thinking about you but doesn't require that he text you back. It's just a cute, quick way to show you like him.^{[7]
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- A text like this also shows that you're confident—you're putting yourself out there and letting him know how you feel.
- Let yourself be playful! You could text, "I can't believe you have the same sense of humor as me. You are so weird. 😜"

7

"I hope you had a nice time tonight.”

Send this one if you're a bit more cautious about the guy. You might be unsure how he feels so this carefully suggests that you'd be open for another date without directly asking him. It's also a good way to signal to him that you're interested.^{[8]
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- You could also text something like, "That coffee shop was nice. I'd never been there before." This gives you something to talk about without directly deciding how the date went.
- Mention something that you two talked about. For example, text, "I still haven't decided how I feel about that band. You might have to take me to another show so I can make up my mind. 😉"

8

"I’d really like to see you again. Are you free Saturday?”

Text him this if you really know you like him and want another date. You don't have to wait for him to text you first if you're sure you hit it off. Be clear and direct when you text him again so he knows for sure that you want a second date.^{[9]
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Expert Source

Louie Felix
Dating Coach & Matchmaker
Expert Interview. 5 May 2020.} Here are some other confident texts you could send:^{[10]
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- "I hope you don’t have plans this weekend. I’d love to go out with you.”
- "Is it too soon to ask for another date?”
- "Just a heads up—we're hanging out today. 😏"
- "Are you available on Sunday night? Want to check out that restaurant you mentioned?"

9

"I think you might be trouble…”

This is a flirty text that signals you're interested in him. It's also fun and kind of mysterious so you could send this if you want to shake things up a little. It's also open-ended so it gives him a chance to text back and flirt a little, too. Come up with your own playful message or try one of these:^{[11]
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- "Can we skip the small talk and get right into flirting?"
- "Have you been waiting all day to hear from me?"
- "Am I on your mind right now? 🙂"

10

"Hey mister, when are you going to ask me out again?"

Text him this if you want him to ask you on a second date. Maybe you don't feel like asking him out and that's fine! Signal to him that you enjoyed the date and want another one. Sometimes, a guy just needs a little reassurance before he makes the next move. Here are a few other texts that also get the point across:^{[12]
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- "I'm free this weekend if you were wondering. 😉
- "You should probably ask me on another date soon."
- "Before you even ask, yes, I am available on Friday."

11

"I had a good time, but I’m not feeling a spark.”

It's nice to let a guy know if you didn't feel a connection on the first date. You don't have to go into great detail when you text him. Just be polite and let him know that you're not interested in going out again. These are a few other messages that also send the same idea:^{[13]
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- "Thanks for last night! You're a great person, but I just don't think we hit it off. All the best."
- "I enjoyed our date, but I've been thinking that we're not right for each other."
- "You're a fun person to spend time with, but I think we want different things. Good luck!"

Expert Q&A

Question

What are fun date ideas?

Louie Felix
Dating Coach & Matchmaker
Louie Felix is a Dating Coach and Matchmaker, and the founder and CEO of Matchmaking VIP, a company which provides concierge-level matchmaking services to clients around the world. He is also the COO of Agape Matchmaking based in New York City. With almost 16 years of professional matchmaking and dating coaching experience, Louie has served as CEO for the United States' two largest matchmaking companies serving over 50,000 clients. He has been featured as an expert matchmaker for shows on E! Entertainment Television, WeTV and the CW. He was also recently acknowledged as a top 5 worldwide matchmaker by both the International Dating Conference and the Matchmakers Alliance. Louie was also selected as one of America's top 10 Relationship Experts for the Great Love Debate National Tour.

Louie Felix

Dating Coach & Matchmaker

Expert Answer

Outdoor dates are great. Any type of activity that helps keep you both engaged in each other and avoids awkward silences are great ideas. This will give you both an opportunity to get to know each other in a less formal setting.
Question

How long should you date before you know he's the one?

Louie Felix
Dating Coach & Matchmaker
Louie Felix is a Dating Coach and Matchmaker, and the founder and CEO of Matchmaking VIP, a company which provides concierge-level matchmaking services to clients around the world. He is also the COO of Agape Matchmaking based in New York City. With almost 16 years of professional matchmaking and dating coaching experience, Louie has served as CEO for the United States' two largest matchmaking companies serving over 50,000 clients. He has been featured as an expert matchmaker for shows on E! Entertainment Television, WeTV and the CW. He was also recently acknowledged as a top 5 worldwide matchmaker by both the International Dating Conference and the Matchmakers Alliance. Louie was also selected as one of America's top 10 Relationship Experts for the Great Love Debate National Tour.

Louie Felix

Dating Coach & Matchmaker

Expert Answer

It usually takes a solid two to three months of dating someone to really start to figure out if there's long term potential for the relationship.