This article was co-authored by Joshua Pompey and by wikiHow staff writer, Glenn Carreau. Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert with over 10 years of helping people navigate the online dating world. Joshua has run his own relationship consulting business since 2009 at a success rate of over 99%. His work has been featured in CNBC, Good Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to as the best online dater in the world.
There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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If you like a guy you've been casually dating for a while, how can you tell when he's ready to take things to the next level? Don't worry! Men sometimes have trouble expressing their emotions outright, but that doesn't mean they're not interested. Keep reading to figure out what he's thinking and learn all the signs that he wants you to be his girlfriend.
Steps
He deleted his dating profile.
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Deleting his profile means he doesn't want a new match—he wants you! If the two of you met through an online dating service, check back after a few weeks of dating to see if his profile is still active. A deactivated profile is a surefire sign that he only has eyes for you and is focused on progressing your relationship further—likely sooner rather than later.[1] X Research source
- If his profile is still active, don't lose hope. It doesn't mean he's uninterested; he might have just forgotten or not bothered to go back onto the site. Look for the other signs that he wants you to be his girlfriend.
He drops hints that he's not dating anyone else.
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He may want to take things to the next level if he's already exclusive. If he wants you to be his girlfriend, he might come right out and say that he's not seeing anyone but you. While it doesn't officially make you a couple, statements like that imply that he's devoted to strengthening his relationship with you alone.[2] X Research source
- He might also drop hints by stating how great things are going between you and how much fun he's having with you—or, he might ask you if you're having a good time with him and if you can see yourself in a relationship with him.
- If you're just as interested in him, offer reassurance by confirming that you're also not seeing anyone. This can help banish any self-doubt or nerves stopping him from asking you to be his girlfriend.
- Some equate exclusivity with being in a relationship, but others prefer to have “the talk” (a discussion about being together). When a guy is exclusive without being asked, he’s ready to have "the talk," or planning to start it himself!
He asks you lots of personal questions.
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He'll try to learn everything about you if he wants you as his girlfriend. It's a good sign if he starts asking you more profound, thoughtful questions because it means he sees you as relationship material and wants to get to know you better. If he were only interested in casual dating or hookups, he wouldn't bother to get to know you beyond surface-level information.
- Open-ended questions like, "What are your biggest goals in life?" and "What is your greatest passion?" are excellent signs because he clearly wants to know more about you in a meaningful way.
- He'll also ask many follow-up questions based on conversations, which shows that he's listening to every word you say!
- Be sure to ask him questions about himself, too. Be attentive and actively listen to show him that you're just as interested as he is.
He compliments you often.
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Genuine, specific compliments mean a guy thinks you're pretty special! When he wants you to be his girlfriend, he'll notice all the things that make you special—and he'll be sure to mention them. He'll compliment your clothes, your style, or your intelligence because he's into you. A guy who praises you, whether in person or over text, is clearly smitten with you beyond casual dating.[3] X Research source
- Look out for more precise compliments than "You look nice today." Instead, it could be an observation about how your shirt matches your eyes or the way your smile lights up the room. Detail is the key to sincere praise!
- Compliments about your appearance are lovely, but make sure some go deeper. If he compliments your smarts, sense of humor, talents, or tastes, he's definitely interested.
- Take compliments gracefully and appreciatively. To make him feel valued, give him compliments too.
He initiates communication.
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A guy who texts and calls wants to ensure you stick around. Think about your recent communication with him, and which of you has done more reaching out and establishing contact. Ideally, it'll be a healthy split! When he wants you to be his girlfriend, he'll waste no time texting or calling you whenever he misses you—which will probably be most days.[4] X Research source
- If the two of you talk daily, that's a great sign! Just remember that this doesn't mean he's reaching out every time; you can send the first "good morning" text sometimes, too.
- It's normal to text more since texting is super easy and convenient, but phone calls are an especially great sign. Phone calls are more intimate than text messages, which shows that he's putting extra effort into communication.
He responds to all of your texts.
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Fast responses to your texts mean he’s eager to hear from you. When it's your turn to send the first text, note how fast his replies are. If he's usually quite responsive, your guy is interested in you as a girlfriend. Men who aren't invested in a relationship take their time without worrying about what the other person will think.[5] X Research source
- Remember that life happens, and nobody is perfect. For example, if he has an intense job and you don't hear from him during work hours, that's completely normal. So long as he texts you as soon as he can, it's still a good sign.
He stays close to you when you're out.
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He'll stick by your side to show you that he's romantically invested. Physical closeness is his way of showing you that he cares, he's proud to be seen with you in public, and he wants to be closer to you. Guys tend to express their feelings through physical displays of affection, so you might also notice light touches here and there on the arm, elbow, and back.
- He could also start holding your hand while you're out in public—another way for him to express care and affection through physical gestures.
He invites you to hang out with his friends.
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He's making you a bigger part of his life by introducing you to friends. Mixing friends and a potential partner is a big deal; it means he wants to see how well you fit with the other piece of his social life and vice versa. He likely wouldn't introduce you to his friends if he didn't want you all hanging out together for the long haul, implying that he plans to ask you to be his girlfriend soon.[6] X Research source
- He might even ask you to meet his family. Although everyone has a different pace, it's a good sign if he wants to introduce you to his relatives.
He spends most of his free time with you.
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His schedule will start to fit yours when he wants to be a couple. A guy who wants to be your boyfriend will do whatever he can to see you often, even if that means rearranging his schedule so he can accommodate yours. He'll start considering you before he plans, asking you in advance if you'll be able to do things with him, and spending most of his free time with you.[7] X Research source
- It usually takes at least 2 months of casual dating for couples to make things official, but every pair is different! It’s more about the amount of time you spend together—so if he’s making every effort to see you, “the talk” isn't far behind.
- This will be the case even if challenges come up or you live further apart. Whether it's a busy week at work or you live a few towns apart, he'll be eager to spend time with you regardless.
- Do you spend a lot of weekends together? Weekends are a cherished time for people to rest and relax, so it's significant if he spends his weekends with you!
He gives you small gifts and makes sweet gestures.
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A guy who does things just to please you is interested in a relationship. He might bring you simple but meaningful surprise gifts, stock his home with your favorite treats, or pick up a coffee for you just the way you like it. Every gesture he makes will prove just how well he knows you and has been listening to you when you talk about yourself—and attentiveness is a sure sign of interest.
- Show lots of appreciation and thank him when he does something sweet for you. Try to return the favor and set up a healthy give and take in the relationship so both of you feel valued and happy.
He prioritizes your needs.
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He'll rush to your aid no matter what if he's romantically invested. Think about your conversations: has he asked you to call or text him anytime if you need him? That's a big sign that he wants to be in a committed relationship. Furthermore, if he follows through and is ready to help you at the drop of a hat, it means he's already thinking of you as a girlfriend.[8] X Research source
- For example, a guy who prioritizes your needs will go the extra mile to pick you up from work if your car breaks down, or show up at your job with lunch if you’re too busy to get it yourself.
He apologizes first after a conflict.
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A willingness to apologize means he doesn't want to lose you. No matter who is in the wrong (even if it's you), a guy who wants you to be his girlfriend will go out of his way to smooth things between you. He'll readily apologize and acknowledge his faults because he doesn't want to let the argument come between you.
- Likewise, accept his apology gracefully. If you might also be responsible for the disagreement, do your best to apologize to him too. Don't let any negative feelings fester, or they may affect the relationship later.[9] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
He wants more than just sex from the relationship.
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As he opens up to you, he'll start to see a partner—not a hookup. Some relationships begin (and fizzle out) because they're based purely on attraction and sex. If he's really boyfriend material and wants you to be a girlfriend, he'll be more interested in forming a more profound connection based on emotional vulnerability than physical closeness. He'll openly express his feelings to you.[10] X Research source
- Does your guy discuss his hopes, fears, passions, concerns, and dreams with you? Does he tell you that he misses you when you're apart? He's expressing emotional vulnerability and wants to be closer to you.
He's always supportive of you.
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If he sees you as a girlfriend, the things that matter to you matter to him. When you get a promotion at work or make a breakthrough in your latest project, he's the first to congratulate you and think of some fun way to celebrate. If you need advice or a pep talk, he's always there to hype you up and remind you how special you are. A guy who really likes you will act like your biggest fan![11] X Research source
- Support him in return to solidify your bond and make him see what a great pair you’ll make. Cheer him on, let him vent when he needs to, and reassure him when he’s unsure of himself.
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References
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sex-matters/201810/are-we-exclusive-yet
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dating-and-mating/201605/4-ways-you-can-turn-crush-relationship
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/ink-blots-cartoons/201706/how-compliment-beautiful-people-better
- ↑ https://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/g23621173/signs-he-likes-you/
- ↑ https://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/g23621173/signs-he-likes-you/
- ↑ https://www.seventeen.com/love/dating-advice/g23621173/signs-he-likes-you/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-you
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/liking-the-child-you-love/201607/seven-signs-hes-really-in-love-you
- ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/relationship-help.htm