How to Talk to a Boy You Like

Last Updated: December 6, 2022 References Approved

Talking to a boy that you have feelings for can be very intimidating. You may be worried about how you look, what you sound like, and if he’s interested. Using eye contact and talking about him will show him that you’re interested. Stay confident and true to yourself the entire time.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Looking Good

1
Flatter your body. Every person has a couple outfits that make them feel better than anything else in their wardrobe; there’s outfits that make them smile bigger and walk taller than any others. Pick one of these to wear when you’re going to talk to the boy you like. If he can’t take his eyes off of you, chances are he’s interested.^{[1]
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Research source}
2
Don’t overdo it. If your number one choice of outfit is your prom dress—go with number two. Keep your outfit appropriate for the occasion. He’ll likely be distracted if you’re wearing an outlandish outfit.

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3
Be comfortable. If you’ve outgrown your favorite outfit, that’s ok. Go out and buy a new one, or pick something else from your closet. You want to be as comfortable as possible, while still looking good. This way, you aren’t fidgeting with your clothes while you talk to him; you’ll come off as nervous and make him uncomfortable.^{[2]
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Expert Source

Cristina Morara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.}

Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Talking to Him

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Ask questions. Ask open ended questions to get him engaged in the conversation. Talk about absolutely anything that you’re comfortable with. This will get him talking to you and can show off some of your interests as well. Have a few in mind before you strike up a conversation in case there is any extended silence.^{[3]
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Expert Source

Cristina Morara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.}
- "What did you think about the game last week?"
- "What are your plans for the weekend?"
- "What did you think about the end of that new movie?"
2
Show interest. Pay attention to what they’re saying. Show interest in who they are and what they’re all about. If you bring up something that he likes, it’s likely that he’ll want to talk about it—to you—more. Don’t act as though you like something that you don’t. If you fake it, he’ll likely pick up on it and no guy wants to be faked out.^{[4]
X
Expert Source

Cristina Morara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.}
- Don’t be afraid to disagree, but stay open-minded to their opinions too.
3
Be engaging. Don’t be a reporter and rattle off question after question. Joke with him and laugh at his jokes. Laughing at his jokes, even if they aren’t hilarious, will get his attention. When you’re happy and laughing, it will be hard for him not to catch on.
4
Speak with class. Don’t swear or speak poorly of people. If he’s talking about something he really likes and cares about, swearing or speaking down on it would be an automatic flag telling him that he shouldn’t be interested in you.

Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Being Yourself

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Stick to your values. Don’t be so focused on impressing him that you begin lying about yourself. Don’t fake interests or opinions. Not only does this show him bad ethics, but it will come back to haunt you later. Share the truth about yourself. If your family, friends, or personal interests are constantly on your mind, talk about them. Don’t be afraid to talk about what you do best.^{[5]
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Research source}
2
Use eye contact. This is a non-verbal tool that is just as important as the things you’re saying. It communicates confidence, sincerity, and respect. Eye contact connects you with him.^{[6]
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Research source}
- You can even flirt with your eyes. Do this by holding eye contact for two or three seconds and then looking away during the beginning of the conversation. It will keep him looking for your eye contact again, practice it on and off throughout the time that you’re speaking.^{[7]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Cristina Morara
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.}
- You should know what color his eyes are after the first conversation.
3
Be confident. If you’re noticeably nervous, he will feel uncomfortable. Be comfortable and proud of your unique and amazing personality. Show yourself off by having good posture, and speaking clearly.^{[8]
X
Research source} Slouching and mumbling aren’t attractive.

Expert Q&A

Question

How can I impress a boy while chatting?

Cristina Morara
Dating Coach
Cristina Morara is a Professional Matchmaker, Dating Coach, Relationship Expert, and the Founder of Stellar Hitch Private Matchmaking, a luxury matchmaking service based in Los Angeles that serves clients nationwide and internationally. As a former casting director, Cristina specializes in finding the perfect partner through her exclusive global network and detailed, warm approach. Cristina holds a BA in Communications and Psychology from Villanova University. Stellar Hitch has been featured in the Huffington Post, Chelsea Handler’s Netflix documentary, ABC News, the Tonight Show, Voyage LA, and the Celebrity Perspective.

Cristina Morara

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Don't focus on trying to impress anyone. Just be yourself, be genuine, and enjoy talking to him. Smile and make eye contact while you talk. That's really the best thing you can do if you want him to notice or like you!
Question

What can I do if I keep falling for boys too fast?

Cristina Morara
Dating Coach
Cristina Morara is a Professional Matchmaker, Dating Coach, Relationship Expert, and the Founder of Stellar Hitch Private Matchmaking, a luxury matchmaking service based in Los Angeles that serves clients nationwide and internationally. As a former casting director, Cristina specializes in finding the perfect partner through her exclusive global network and detailed, warm approach. Cristina holds a BA in Communications and Psychology from Villanova University. Stellar Hitch has been featured in the Huffington Post, Chelsea Handler’s Netflix documentary, ABC News, the Tonight Show, Voyage LA, and the Celebrity Perspective.

Cristina Morara

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

It's difficult, but you need to step back and assess who you're falling for early on before you let your feelings run wild. Really take a good look at who you're falling for to see if there are any red flags you're overlooking because you're infatuated. That's really key early on, since we tend to rationalize potential problems because we want things to work out.
Question

What does it mean if he says he'll call and he never does?

Cristina Morara
Dating Coach
Cristina Morara is a Professional Matchmaker, Dating Coach, Relationship Expert, and the Founder of Stellar Hitch Private Matchmaking, a luxury matchmaking service based in Los Angeles that serves clients nationwide and internationally. As a former casting director, Cristina specializes in finding the perfect partner through her exclusive global network and detailed, warm approach. Cristina holds a BA in Communications and Psychology from Villanova University. Stellar Hitch has been featured in the Huffington Post, Chelsea Handler’s Netflix documentary, ABC News, the Tonight Show, Voyage LA, and the Celebrity Perspective.

Cristina Morara

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

It's not a good sign. This is a red flag, especially early on. It's a sign that he doesn't do what he says he's going to do, which can indicate that he's not mature enough for a serious relationship. It could also mean that he isn't making you a priority, or that he's forgetful. Regardless of the reason, it's usually a reason to be a little suspicious if you're thinking about pursuing a relationship.