How to Act on a Movie Date at Your Boyfriend's House

Co-authored by Lisa Shield

Last Updated: August 5, 2020

Movies can be a great way to go on a date with your boyfriend. They can be fun and give you some quality couple time. Your boyfriend may even ask you to come over to his house for a movie date. You might be nervous about how you should behave, especially if you haven’t met your boyfriend’s family yet. There are many ways to act on a movie date at your boyfriend’s house such as making a good first impression, behaving appropriately during the film, and avoiding potentially difficult situations with him or his family.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Making A Good First Impression

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Gather information about family members. You might be really nervous about going to your boyfriend’s house, even if you know his family already. Asking your boyfriend questions about his family can help you start conversations.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Lisa Shield
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 13 December 2018.} Not only can this break the ice, but it also creates a good impression of you and shows that you care enough about your boyfriend to be interested in his family.^{[2]
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- Find out things your boyfriend’s family likes and any special news they may have. Don’t focus on anything negative. It’s better to be able to say, “Mrs. Schmidt, Peter said you got a great job offer. That’s awesome! What will you be doing?” than, “Mr. Schmidt, Peter said you got pulled over by the cops for speeding last week.”
- Make sure you get information on every family member, including small children. This will allow you to engage them in conversation, too. For example, “Anna, your big brother said you know your colors! Can you tell me them? What color shirt am I wearing?” Show genuine interest and ask questions. This will let them do most of the talking while you appear friendly.
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Dress appropriately for the occasion. Movies at home can be casual and your outfit should reflect that. Wearing a clean and comfortable outfit and simple makeup can help you enjoy the movie and be appropriate for the occasion.^{[3]
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- Set out a couple of different outfits for yourself. For example, you could wear skinny jeans, a comfy sweater or cardigan, and a pair of comfortable boots. You could also wear a pair of loose jeans with a white shirt and a pair of cute sneakers. These types of outfits keep you comfortable and classy.^{[4]
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  Expert Source
  
  Lisa Shield
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 13 December 2018.}
- Avoid wearing anything that is too tight, see-through, low-cut, or ripped – keep it classy and conservative.
- Apply simple makeup that lets your natural beauty show. A little blush, mascara, and light-colored lip balm is perfect for a movie date at your boyfriend’s house.
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Bring some snacks or a small gift. Your boyfriend’s family is opening up their home to you when you’re invited for a movie. To show your gratitude for their kindness, bring them a small gift, such as a box of chocolate or some snacks for the movie.
- Take something that is appropriate for the occasion. You can ask your boyfriend what his family likes, such as chocolate. If your boyfriend has small siblings, consider bringing them something like a coloring book; if his younger sister likes dolls, bring her a Barbie.
- Bring snacks for the movie including chips, popcorn, ice cream, or pizza. Ask your parents to help you out if you need a couple extra dollars.
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Greet your boyfriend and his family. When you get to your boyfriend’s house, it’s important to greet his family warmly if they are home. This can put them—and you—at ease and be the start of a great evening.^{[5]
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- Take a deep breath as you approach his family to help you relax. Then smile, shake hands, say hello. Look into your boyfriend’s parents’ eyes as you shake their hands and say, “Hello Mrs. Schmidt.” Show respect by calling his parents “Mr.” and “Mrs.” unless they tell you to use their first names.
- Give your boyfriend a hug to say hello. You may not know his family’s feelings about public displays of affection, so a hug is a safe way to show love without making anyone uncomfortable.

Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Watching the Movie Casually with Your Boyfriend

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Be yourself—and on your best behavior. You might still be nervous, even if everything is going well. Relax and be yourself as much as possible. Being a bit nervous can show your boyfriend and his family that you really care about making a good impression.^{[6]
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Research source} Err on the side of caution when it comes to expressing personal opinions or taking over conversations.
- Chat with your boyfriend’s family before the movie starts if you are watching the film together. Don’t express too many personal opinions if you don’t know them very well. Their views may be different than yours and you wouldn’t want to offend them.
- Avoid behaving in a way that you wouldn’t normally.^{[7]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Lisa Shield
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 13 December 2018.} For example, if your boyfriend and/ or his family enjoy commenting on the trailers or talk a lot during the film, do what makes you comfortable. This could be joining the chat or just smiling and keeping quiet.
- Keep your behavior transparent. For example, if you’re watching the movie with your boyfriend in his bedroom, leave the door open so there isn’t any question about what you’re doing. If you and your boyfriend are sharing a blanket, consider keeping your hands visible so that no one worries you and your boyfriend are doing anything inappropriate.
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Mirror the behavior of his family. Your boyfriend’s family might watch the movie with you. In this case, look to his parents or other family members to cue you on what behavior is acceptable. Allow them to set the tone—casual or formal. This shows respect for his family and home. It can also ensure that you are invited back. Even if you are watching the movie without your boyfriend’s family, respect their wishes about things such as the lights. Allow them to check in on you and ask questions as they wish.
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Keep physical contact to a minimum. Watching a movie together can be very romantic. It may make you feel like snuggling or kissing your boyfriend. Save kissing, flirting, or any other physical activities for when his family isn’t at home.
- Remember that you are there to watch a movie, not show how much you care about each other romantically. Even if you are in your boyfriend’s room and his family is in the house, keep your physical contact appropriate. For example, you could hold hands or sit touching one another. All of this shows respect for yourself, your boyfriend, and his family.
- Let your boyfriend know your comfort level with contact. For example, you could say, “I’m not comfortable with more than holding hands in your house. Maybe that will change in the future, but for now, this is good for me.”

Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Dealing with Potentially Difficult Situations

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Respect his family. Every family has different ways of behaving and rules for family members. Keep in mind that your boyfriend’s family may have different rules than your family. If this is the case, remember that you are in his house and need to respect his family’s rules. This can ensure that everyone enjoys the movie and creates a good impression of you.^{[8]
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- Talk to your boyfriend about any behaviors that you should avoid. You may also want to know about what rules his family may have. For example, they might find holding hands inappropriate or not like it if you wear shoes in the house.
- Stay out of disagreements or arguments. If there is negative conversation about your boyfriend, avoid giving your opinion, even if you are asked. Instead, say, “Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t know about that.” If you and your boyfriend have a disagreement or argument, say, “Let’s talk about this another time.”
- It’s best to avoid sensitive issues like politics and religion. If they come up, just be polite and say you’d prefer not to discuss it at the moment.
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Avoid mentioning relationship problems. Family members want to know that your boyfriend is happy in your relationship. Reassure them of this with stories about upcoming plans such as prom or going on a challenging hike. Even if you are having problems with your boyfriend, smile and be positive.
- Keep in mind that you are there to enjoy a movie date, not discuss relationship issues. Mentioning these problems to him or his family can make the date uncomfortable. Remember that your boyfriend’s family will always take his side if there are problems.
- Avoid asking about your boyfriend’s ex-girlfriends. For example, asking your boyfriend or his family, “Did your/ his ex ever come over for a movie?,” is inappropriate and may make them uncomfortable.
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Go home if you’re uncomfortable. If anything happens or is said that makes you uncomfortable, excuse yourself politely from the date. This can relieve any tension, prevent further discomfort, and make you feel better.
- Avoid making it obvious that you’re uncomfortable. Politely excuse yourself at a convenient moment. For example, you can say, “I’m really sorry, but I have to be going. I’ve got some things to do at home. Thanks so much for having me over and I can’t wait to see you again soon.”
- Let your boyfriend know that you are fine, but need to rest. Don’t tell him you are uncomfortable or were upset about something. This may cause problems between you and your boyfriend or his family.

Community Q&A

Question

Where should I put my hand if I am cuddling my boyfriend during the movie?

Community Answer

You can put it somewhere that makes you, your boyfriend, and his family comfortable. This might be around his arm or neck or on his leg. You can also always put your hand on the armrest of a sofa.