An expert guide to help you find out if he likes you as just a friend, or something more

Lately you and your favorite guy friend have been spending more time together, and you’re starting to think that maybe you’d like to take things to the next level. The only problem is, you don’t know if he feels the same way! Does he have you firmly planted in the Friend Zone, or does he reciprocate your warm and fuzzy feelings? Keep on reading: we've compiled a list of ways to tell if he sees you as just a friend or something more.

Things You Should Know

  • Notice if he compliments you a lot, laughs at your jokes, and can’t seem to stop looking in your direction. These are signs he might be romantically interested.
  • See how he treats other people, especially other girls: does he flirt with you more and go out of his way to touch you? This might mean he's into you.
  • Pay attention to what you do when you spend time together. Do you do romantic things when you hang out? If so, he might want to date you.
  • Observe how much he talks to you outside of work or school. If he only talks to you in those contexts, he's probably only interested in a casual friendship.
1

He compliments you.

  1. Compliments are his way of saying he admires you. Of course, friends often compliment one another, so compliments in and of themselves may not be a way to tell if he’s interested in you. But if he’s recently upped his game, or if he compliments you more than he compliments other people, it’s likely he’s got a crush on you.[1]
    • Giving you compliments also means he cares about you and wants you to feel good about yourself—who doesn’t feel good after hearing that they’re cute or funny or brainy?
    • When he does compliment you, respond with a smile, or give him a compliment in return so he knows the feeling is mutual.
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2

He gazes at you.

  1. His admiration of you may come in the form of staring. If he likes you as more than a friend, you might see him gazing in your direction from across the room. If you catch his eye and he smiles before turning away, he knows that he’s been caught looking at you.[2]
    • Not only will he gaze in your direction, but if he likes you, his pupils may dilate when he looks at you, just like a cartoon character in love.[3]
    • If you like him, make eyes at him to let him know!
3

He angles his body toward yours.

  1. See if his body is engaged while you're talking to him. If his entire body is turned toward you, he’s open to what you have to say.[4] He might also lean closer to you, tilt his head slightly while you interact, and sit with relaxed posture to indicate he's comfortable with you and interested in you.[5]
    • He may even subconsciously direct his body toward you when you aren’t interacting! Sneak a peak at him next time he’s chatting with someone else across the room. Are his chest and feet directed toward you?
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7

He texts you a lot.

  1. If he texts you a lot, he wants to include you in his life. Lots of friends text, but if you're texting each other all day long, it means there's a real connection there. Alternatively, if he only talks to you when he sees you in person at work or school and doesn't text much outside of those contexts, he might only be interested in casual friendship.[8]
    • If he likes you, he might text you “What’s the homework?” but he'll use it as an excuse to segue into a conversation.
    • He might not be that big on texting, but if he likes you, he’ll find a way to talk to you after work, school, or wherever you traditionally see each other: for instance, he might call you on the phone or message you on social media.
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8

He opens up to you.

  1. Talking about personal things shows that he trusts you. Bringing up deeper subjects, such as his fears or family issues, may mean that he wants to take your relationship with him to a deeper level. It means he sees you as a partner—someone he can rely on. On the other hand, if your conversations are usually surface-level, it's probably a sign he's not interested in taking things deeper.[9]
    • Don't be afraid to confide in him in return: not only will it show him you trust him too, but if he doesn't seem interested in what you're saying, it might be a sign he's using you as an emotional outlet. Emotional support should be a 2-way street.
9

He talks to you about past relationships.

  1. If he wants to know your dating history, he’s probably into you. He might want to know how many serious relationships you’ve had, what kind of guys you’re into, and what your ideal relationship looks like. He might also tell you about his past relationships and what he’s looking for as well. These are signs he’s interested in taking things to the next level with you.
    • If he makes constant attempts to set you up with another boy, it may be a sign you’re in the friend zone.
    • Listen to his comments concerning other girls. It can tell you if he just wants your dating advice or if you're the girl he is after. Constant requests for advice indicate that he may be only interested in your opinion since you're a girl.
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10

He pays attention when you speak.

  1. A guy who’s invested in you will demonstrate active listening. Observe his body language for signs he’s paying careful attention to what you’re saying. He’ll maintain good eye contact, nod while you speak, and remember little details about what you’ve said in the past. These are all signs he likes you and he’s interested in what you have to say.
    • Note if he gets easily distracted. If someone else approaches him while you're talking to him, does he instantly abandon your conversation? If this does occur more than once, he may not consider your words as important.
    • However, keep in mind that he may avoid looking at you out of shyness.
14

He treats you differently than other girls.

  1. If he pays more attention to you than your friends, he's probably interested. While he may be kind to others, you may be the only one he wants to be around in big groups.[12] You also could be the only girl he teases or hugs. If you stick out differently from the other girls, this is a sign that he has his eyes set on you.
    • However, if you notice him teasing and touching every girl in a five-mile radius, he may just be a flirt.
    • If he’s open to letting you hang out with him and his new date, he may see you as a friend.
    • However, if he’s hesitant about hanging out with other girls besides you, he might already see you as his girlfriend and feel like he is being disloyal.
15

He goes out of his way to see you.

  1. If he likes you, he’ll find a way to spend time with you. Whether he asks you directly to hang out a lot or always seems to sidle up to you when you hang out in groups, if he likes you, he’ll try to spend time with you. He might even make excuses to hang out with you—for instance, he might say he’s “in your area” and ask if you want to meet up. If he's making excuses, he might be embarrassed about how much he wants to be with you.[13]
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16

You hang out alone together a lot.

  1. Spending one-on-one time together is a sign he craves intimacy with you. When you hang out, are you hanging solo or with a big group of people? Wanting to have you to himself indicates he likes you as more than a friend. On the other hand, if he invites his entire fraternity to join you when you hang out, he may not see you as more than a pal. But pay attention: if he only invites other couples to join you, he probably wants to pair off with you.[15]
    • Does he take the initiative to ask you to hang out? This is a big sign he's into you.[16]
17

You spend weekends and evenings together.

19

You do couple-y things when you hang out.

  1. If your hangouts are romantic, it means he wants to be a couple. Do you engage in more date-like activities, like candlelit dinners, or relationship-like outings, like grocery shopping together? Or are you on the buddy system? Taking a long hard look at how you hang out can help you understand his real intentions.
    • Are you doing couple-y things together without being a couple? Do you find yourself grocery shopping, cooking dinner together, or even going to the farmer's market with one grocery bag? These may be signs that he sees you as a girlfriend already.
    • If you often do romantic things together, like picnics in the park or wine tastings, it could mean he wants to turn your friendship into a romantic relationship.
    • Note how long you hang out for when you see him. Does your coffee date turn into a 3-hour discussion, or is he gone in the time it takes you to ask for the check? If he can't stop talking to you, this is a sign that he wants something more from you.
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20

Other people say he likes you.

  1. An easy way to find out how he feels is simply to ask other people. Of course, do this with caution if you don't want him to find out what you really think about him. His friends may know for sure if he’s got the hots for you, but your friends likely also have valuable outsider insights if they’ve observed the two of you together a lot.
    • Ask his friends if he's seeing anyone or if he has feelings for anyone. Pick a friend you really trust, though—otherwise, he might report to your guy immediately.
    • You could also have one of your friends ask him if he has his eye on someone special. Your friend doesn’t have to be direct: they can pretend that they want to set him up with someone else, for example.
21

He tells you he likes you.

  1. Try to get him to confess his feelings so you know once and for all. In the end, things may not move forward if you don't take the initiative. If you're pretty sure he likes you or are just feeling brave, then go ahead and tell him how you feel. Be lighthearted and don't take it too seriously. Just find the right moment to tell him you have a crush on him and are wondering if he feels it too.[18]
    • Don't be disappointed if he doesn't reciprocate your feelings. In the end, it may just not be meant to be. You've done something brave, and that's admirable.
    • It's possible things will be awkward between you two if he doesn't share your feelings. Let him know you'd still like to be friends, and give him space if he needs it.[19]
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Community Q&A

  • Question
    How do I give him little hints that I like him?
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer
    This answer was written by one of our trained team of researchers who validated it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    wikiHow Staff Editor
    Staff Answer
    If you want to subtly convey that you're interested in taking things to the next level, try out any of the methods listed above: maintain good eye contact and angle your body toward him, laugh at his jokes, text him and send him memes, and show him you care about him by offering emotional support and going out of your way to do little favors for him. If he likes you back, he might do these things in return!
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About This Article

Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT
Co-authored by:
Licensed Relationship Therapist
This article was co-authored by Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT and by wikiHow staff writer, Dev Murphy. Alysha Jeney is a Licensed Relationship Therapist, the Owner of Modern Love Counseling, and the Co-Founder of The Modern Love Box. She specializes in relationship therapy, intimacy building, and existential exploration. Alysha holds a BA in Psychology from The Metropolitan State University of Denver and an MA in Marriage and Family Therapy/Counseling from Regis University. She has been featured in publications such as The Washington Post and The Huffington Post. This article has been viewed 7,248,769 times.
11 votes - 82%
Co-authors: 163
Updated: February 14, 2023
Views: 7,248,769
Categories: Getting a Boyfriend
Article SummaryX

To tell if a guy likes you as more than a friend, see if he’s going out of his way to get your attention and win you over. For example, maybe he’s always doing you favors like cooking you food or maybe he shows his thoughtfulness by buying you things you’ve mentioned you like. You should also observe whether he goes out of his way to be with you by constantly asking you to hang out or wanting to be your partner in class. When you do hang out together, note whether you’re spending more time one-on-one rather than in a group with his other friends, which could be a sign that he likes you. You can also see if your hangouts are more romantic, like dinner at a fancy restaurant. For more advice, including how to ask other people if a guy likes you, read on!

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