You've heard the saying "put yourself in someone else's shoes"—but what exactly does this mean? It's actually a request to see the perspective from the other person's side and empathize with them. It can be a tough skill to learn at first, but we've got your back. Read on to learn some useful tips and tricks about practicing empathy, so you can find the middle road to compromise, acceptance, and perhaps even friendship.

1

Listen more and speak less.

3

Acknowledge their experience.

5

Let people be vulnerable.

  1. Social requirements make people feel the need to be tough and not air their hardships. This causes people to bottle everything up and put on a front in public. This can also lead to seeming more stubborn, difficult, or uncaring than is really the case, because it's all about seeming to be coping. Give people the space to let down their defenses and to give their side of the story a chance to be heard.
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6

Be accepting.

  1. Everyone makes mistakes. Things happen that are not purposefully wrong but which were out of the person's control. Most people try the hardest that they can to do things the right way, to overcome obstacles, and to be good people. Sometimes the difference between turning "to the dark side" and no longer caring or remaining hopeful and continuing to strive resides in the moment when a person, such as yourself, steps in and says "It's okay, it was a mistake, you have learned and will now be able to move on."
    • So, the next time someone goes through something terrible, think first, and never make judgments about their mistakes because everyone makes them. Be sensitive and listen.

References

  1. Attributions vary, Plato possibly.
  2. Mary Church, PhD. Research & Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.
  3. Mary Church, PhD. Research & Clinical Psychologist. Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.

About This Article

Mary Church, PhD
Co-authored by:
Research & Clinical Psychologist
This article was co-authored by Mary Church, PhD. Dr. Mary Church is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist based in Honolulu, Hawaii. With over a decade of clinical experience, she aims to integrate evolution, genetics, and neuroscience within the practice of psychotherapy. Dr. Church holds a BS in Psychology from Eckerd College and an MS and PhD in Experimental Psychology from The University of Memphis. She completed a Post-Doctorate in Clinical Psychology at The University of Hawaii at Manoa. In addition, Dr. Church is a member of the American Evaluation Association and Hawaii-Pacific Evaluation Association. This article has been viewed 37,071 times.
5 votes - 64%
Co-authors: 9
Updated: October 25, 2022
Views: 37,071
Categories: Emotions and Feelings
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