How to Be a New Mom

Last Updated: January 28, 2023

Congratulations on becoming a new mom! This can be a very difficult and somewhat scary time, but it will also be one of the most special, as taking good care of your new little one is very rewarding. Like anything new, there is a kind of high at first, as you get to know and show love to your new baby. The opportunity for fun hardly ends, as you put new outfits on them and take endless pictures of how cute they are. It is a lot of fun, but sometimes being a new mom can be a difficult job. Here are some tips that will help to make your role as a new mom a bit easier to manage.

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Adapting to Your New Role

1
Stay positive at all times. Your or your spouse's being negative about anything will discourage you. More importantly, the baby develops its psyche under whatever conditions it is brought up in. So be careful what you say about yourself and your baby. Reasonably happy parents make for a better-adjusted, smiling baby.
- Believe that you can be a good mom, and you will be. Believe that your baby is going to be a good baby, and he or she will be, or at least you will ensure that he/she will be.
2
Try to not worry too much. To worry about anything drains your energy. Worrying does not solve any problems. It makes the problems seem bigger than they really are.
- If your baby gets a fever, for example, try to not worry right away that he/she will get brain damage, etc. Most fevers go away after about 24 hours. Just give your baby some medication as directed by the label, and everything will most likely be okay. Let your baby sleep as much as they want to to fight off the fever.
- If your baby is crying and you can't figure out why, it may be because of gas and that they need to be burped. Usually babies cry when they are hungry, for the most part, but their needing to burp is something that is harder for moms to think of. Sometimes you will have changed your baby, fed your baby, but they are still crying and it might be driving you crazy. Don't worry, every mom has been there, at a loss and not knowing what else to do. You may just need to pat their back and hold them upright so that they can burp.
- Swaddling your baby can also comfort them and help them to stop crying, if the crying continues after feeding and burping.
Advertisement
3
Try to remain calm and keep your cool.^{[1]
X
Expert Source

Rebecca Nguyen, MA
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
Expert Interview. 10 June 2019.} Don't worry too much if you make a mistake or lightly bump your baby's head, and don't let your spouse worry too much either.
4
Try to cut back and make time and room for parenting.
- Take as much time off work as you can in this time so you won't have to worry about sleeping so many hours every night so that you are rested for work.
- If you can, move to a smaller house or cheaper apartment so that your family can survive on one income until your baby is older.
5
Ensure that you have support from a family member.^{[2]
X
Expert Source

Rebecca Nguyen, MA
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
Expert Interview. 10 June 2019.} You can't do this huge new job on your own. You will feel overwhelmed if you don't have any help at all.
- If at all possible, make sure you are living near supportive family members. You will definitely need their help and advice. Also whenever you have questions, Google whatever it might be. You can find the answer to pretty much anything online.
- You have to have breaks, even if it's just going to the store by yourself, baby free, once a week. Try to get your mom or mother in law to babysit once a week, so you can relax and recapture the peaceful life you had before taking on all this responsibility.
6
Take time to maintain your other relationships.^{[3]
X
Expert Source

Rebecca Nguyen, MA
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
Expert Interview. 10 June 2019.} Still have friends after your new baby comes. If you used to go to a book group or religious group, keep going. It helps a lot to have other women to talk to about being a mom.
- Make sure you maintain a healthy relationship with your spouse and don't let the baby consume all of your time. It can be easy for your husband to get jealous of a new baby, but if you still do things together, that will help. Watch movies together, play games, or go shopping.
7
Go easy on yourself if you have to shift your obligations. You probably won't be able to do everything that you did before your baby arrived.
- If you used to go to church every Sunday, don't stress yourself out too much if you can't make it to church on Sundays anymore. You can find alternatives during this phase of your life, such as watching online church services or going to a mid-week Bible study when a babysitter is available.
- Be flexible and refrain from forcing yourself to go out when you know the baby might have a very hard time in the nursery, etc.
8
Be forgiving of yourself. Have grace with yourself. You don't have to be the perfect mom, because no one alive can be a perfect mom. We all make mistakes, but always know that is okay.^{[4]
X
Expert Source

Rebecca Nguyen, MA
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
Expert Interview. 10 June 2019.}
- Don't blame yourself for not being perfect. Realize it would be impossible to be. Don't expect too much of yourself or anyone else.
9
Have fun and enjoy your new baby. Don't just take care of him or her. Play with your baby, laugh with them, and make faces and noises at them. Dress them up in tons of cute outfits. Take lots of pictures. Learn to enjoy this time because it goes by quickly.
10
Give yourself a huge congrats on getting to be a mother. Not everyone gets to be one. Remember to be incredibly thankful everyday that you have the most precious gift in the entire world. Recognize that it is a tremendous privilege to get to be a mom. You are a very lucky and very fortunate woman.

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Using Some Parenting "Tricks"

1
Learn ways to make being a mom easier on yourself. It is hard enough to be employed 24/7 as a parent. The hours can be a very hard adjustment to make.
- Your life now revolves around your new little one. You have to deny yourself and serve your new baby in almost every single hour of your day. You keep getting your sleep interrupted. You can't get outside as much as you might want to. Remember to give yourself breaks sometimes: listen to fun music or watch some good movies.
2
Prop the bottle up on a blanket. This will free your hands so that you can get some work done. Sometimes, this can be a nice break which will allow you to get things done or just relax for a bit.
3
Get a swing. Nothing will do more for making your life easier than getting a swing. Fisher Price is a good brand; they seem to be durable and last longer. Babies are used to motion, because when they were in your tummy, they rocked and rolled all over the place whenever you moved around.
- Swinging is a good way to get your baby to sleep, since they are moving like they are used to. You can try rocking them yourself, but it can be hard to set them down after you've rocked them to sleep. Babies usually wake up when you lay them down in their crib etc. A swing saves you from having to worry about that.
- It is possible for a baby to sleep in a swing, one that reclines back, or a bassinet, since co-sleeping is not recommended.
- Swing sleeping can give you peace of mind that your baby is strapped in and won't be able to roll on their tummy, which can be dangerous for them and cause SIDS.
- You can also give them their bottles in the swing. You can hold the bottle for them or, as mentioned before, you can prop the bottle up on a blanket to make things easier for you.
4
Use diaper rash cream often. With disposable diapers, babies get rashes a lot. This can lead to a lot of crying and discomfort for them.
- Sometimes babies resist diaper changing time, or are extra fussy, because they have a rash.
5
Breastfeed your baby.^{[5]
X
Expert Source

Rebecca Nguyen, MA
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
Expert Interview. 10 June 2019.} Milk is much cheaper than formula, and is recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics because it provides the necessary nutrients that are easily digestible by your baby and is associated with a lower risk of SIDS.
- If you are switching from milk from formula, mix the formula with milk. You need to slowly wean your baby off of the formula. If you don't do this, they may become constipated and unhappy. Constipation happens with an abrupt change in diet, so make transitions in food "slow and easy".
6
Utilize a sleep training regimen to avoid too many sleepless nights and promote good sleep habits for your baby.^{[6]
X
Research source}
- Although studies suggest that babies who "cried it out" had no significant short-term or long-term change in their development as opposed to babies whose parents used check-and-console or "camping out" sleep training regimens, such regimens positively impacted the psychological and sleep-related health of the parent and child.
- "Camping out" refers to the parent staying in the room for increasingly shorter periods of time when the baby is crying, while "check-and-console" refers to the parent returning to check on the baby at increasingly longer intervals.
- Don't neglect your baby if you suspect there is a serious problem—attend to their needs as best you can.

Expert Q&A
Did you know you can get expert answers for this article? Unlock expert answers by supporting wikiHow

Question

What is the best advice for a first time mom?

Rebecca Nguyen, MA
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
Rebecca Nguyen is a Certified Lactation Consultant and Childbirth Educator. She runs Family Picnic in Chicago, Illinois with her mother Sue Gottschall, where they teach new parents about childbirth, breastfeeding and child development and education. Rebecca taught preschool through 3rd grade for 10 years, and she received her Master’s Degree in Early Childhood Education from the University of Illinois in 2003.

Rebecca Nguyen, MA

International Board Certified Lactation Consultant

Expert Answer

Support wikiHow by unlocking this expert answer.

A lot of moms and partners get really prepared for the birth of their baby, but they don't think about what's going to happen when they get home and who's going to be taking care of mom. Postpartum recovery takes six to eight weeks, and it's completely normal for it to take even longer. In those first couple of weeks, making sure that you have people that are able to help with cleaning the house, making meals, and do the dishes.