10 Ways to Avoid Awkward Silence with Friends and Keep the Conversation Flowing

Co-authored by Lynda Jean and Madeleine Criglow

Last Updated: June 28, 2021 References

Even the best of friends can experience awkward moments. Maybe you've all gathered for a party at your house and suddenly no one has anything to say, or someone's just said something pretty strange and no one knows how to respond. Whatever the case may be, there are many ways to respond to silence that can help alleviate any awkwardness (or at least make things a little less unbearable).

1

Prepare some conversation topics ahead of time.

That way you’ll have things to talk about whenever the conversation lulls. Maybe you just watched a horror film that your friends might want to hear about or you read something in the news that seems worth discussing. Thinking of some potential conversation topics in advance can come in handy when you're trying to fill an awkward silence.^{[1]
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- If the conversation dies down, try something like, "I just read that a new pizza place is opening up down the street. Have ya'll heard anything about that?" or "I just watched Scream for the first time! Have any of you seen it?"
- Stay away from controversial subjects like politics or religion.^{[2]
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  Expert Source
  
  Lynda Jean
  Certified Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.}

2

Ask questions.

People like talking about themselves! If there's an awkward silence, ask a follow-up question about something your friend said earlier. To really move the conversation along, ask open-ended questions instead of ones with a simple yes or no answer. Try questions like: ^{[3]
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- What was your dream career when you were a kid?
- If you could be any animal for a day, what would you be?
- What would be your dream vacation?
- If you could have dinner with any celebrity, living or dead, who would you choose?

3

Listen to your friends when they talk.

Make sure you're not just planning what you want to say next. Think of a conversation as a collaboration with someone. You've got to really listen to what they have to say to learn new things about that person and come up with a thoughtful response. It's also a great opportunity to listen for potential conversation topics if you find yourself stuck in awkward silence.^{[4]
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- Nod along while someone is talking to help you concentrate on what they're saying. This also helps encourage your friend to keep talking!
- Turn your phone on silent and keep it in your purse or pocket. It's hard to really listen when you're checking your phone or getting text alerts constantly.

4

Look for cues in the room for good conversation starters.

Notice your friend's clothes, the decor in the room, and other details. These can all be great conversation starters if you've run out of things to say. You can compliment your friend's cool sweater or ask them where they got their new backpack. Alternatively, you could say something about the song that's playing on the radio or take note of your friend's brand new stereo. Commenting on something like that can give the conversation a fresh start, and others can chime in on how they feel, too.^{[5]
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- Say something like, "I like your Ramones t-shirt, Rob. Do you have a favorite album of theirs?"

5

Change the subject.

Your conversation may be in need of a fresh start. If you've spent the last ten minutes talking about the same subject, wait for the conversation to die down and bring up a new topic. You can talk about something related, or you could simply bring up a new topic entirely.
- Good conversation topics include philosophy, sports, movies, art, and local events.
- Don't fret if your new topic seems wildly unrelated to the previous subject. Your friends will more than likely appreciate a new subject to talk about, especially if you've been on the same one for a while!

6

Get comfortable with silence.

Not all silences are as awkward as they seem! Maybe you and your friends just need a moment to decompress before starting a new conversation. Take the moment to reflect on what you've been talking about and think of new conversation topics.^{[6]
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- Awkwardness isn't always a bad thing. Feeling awkward can stem from getting out of your comfort zone.
- If these are new friends, maybe you're all just still getting to know each other. Awkwardness and feeling vulnerable is a part of that process!^{[7]
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7

Address the awkwardness.

This can actually help everyone feel more at ease. Your friends may be worried they're the ones being awkward or just as lost on what to say as you. A simple, "Well, this is awkward" will make people laugh, or at least know it's not just them.^{[8]
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- Try making light of the situation. Say something like, "I don't mean to be awkward, but is anyone else having a hard time coming up with something to say?"

8

Let your friends do some of the talking, too.

It's not your responsibility to fill every silence. Your friends can help come up with new things to talk about as well! Relax and don't put too much pressure on yourself to fill every awkward silence. If things are a little quiet, wait for your friends to speak before rushing to talk.^{[9]
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Expert Source

Lynda Jean
Certified Image Consultant
Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.}
- Think of the conversation like taking turns—everyone should get an equal chance to share.^{[10]
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  Expert Source
  
  Lynda Jean
  Certified Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.} If you brought up a new subject after the last lull, give someone else a chance to speak next time a quiet moment arises.

9

Try your best to be confident.

Adopt confident body language. This helps you feel more comfortable with yourself, and it makes you seem more approachable in conversation. Hold your head high and stand or sit up straight as you speak.^{[11]
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Research source} This newfound confidence will help you handle awkward situations with ease, and not overthink or feel insecure every time a moment of silence strikes.
- Feeling more confident will help you put yourself out there if it falls on you to change the subject or ask questions. Trying out these methods if you're feeling insecure can be pretty difficult, and it may not diffuse the awkwardness.^{[12]
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- If you find yourself feeling awkward when someone gives you a compliment, say, "Thank you!" as graciously as possible—don't just let the moment turn into an awkward silence.^{[13]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Lynda Jean
  Certified Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.}

10

Accept when the conversation is over.

It's possible everyone is ready to stop talking. Maybe it's late and you're all tired and ready to go home. Sometimes it's best to just let the conversation end and call it for the night! End the conversation on a good note by politely excusing yourself and thanking your friends for their time.^{[14]
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- Politely say something like, "Well, I'm getting pretty tired. Would ya'll want to call it a night?" or "I think I may have to get home soon. Can't wait to see you again soon!"