This article was co-authored by Imad Jbara and by wikiHow staff writer, Glenn Carreau. Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.
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Asking for a phone number is a great way to stay connected, get a reference, or build a business partnership with a professional contact. The only question is, how should you make your request? You've got a great chance of success if you're respectful, sincere, and confident, and we're here to help. Read on, and we'll show you how to smoothly graduate from emails to phone calls in your professional connections.
Steps
Use a professional-looking email address.
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You'll seem more trustworthy, no matter why you want a phone number. If you have a couple of email addresses to choose from, make sure you're using the more universally acceptable of the two. A good friend might not bat an eye, but someone who doesn't know you that well might get the wrong impression.[1] X Research source
- For example, "Yourname@gmail.com" looks better than "coolguy69@gmail.com" when you're trying to respectfully ask for contact information from a professional acquaintance.
Make a straightforward request.
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Ask for a phone number within the first few sentences of your email. It's better to get to the point and make your request early rather than drop hints for several paragraphs before finally asking for a phone number. Begin with a friendly, polite greeting in the first sentence or two, and then ask if you can exchange phone numbers for future exchanges.[2] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source For example:
- "Hi, Ben. Thank you for responding to my inquiry and offering some really insightful advice. Would it be all right if I added your number to my contacts?"
- “Thanks for your reply! I’m always happy to have another contact in the industry, and I’d love to get your number so we can stay connected.
Give a reason for wanting their number.
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The recipient is more likely to agree if you have a solid reason for asking. Make a sensible suggestion, like exchanging numbers to coordinate schedules, and the response will probably be affirmative. You might also ask for a phone number to send progress updates or to have a quick method of contact in case of an emergency.[3] X Research source
- "I think it'll be easier to organize this project if we exchange numbers! What number can I reach you?"
- "I’ll be away from my computer a lot the next few days. Let’s exchange numbers so we can text or call about updates instead."
Tell them you prefer phone calls.
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Phone calls are better for discussing sensitive or complicated topics. It's easier to have an effective conversation when you can speak to one another in real-time, rather than waiting for an email reply. Asking for a phone number so you can call is also a great way to show the other person you're serious about building a professional connection.[4] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source
- "Let's hop on a call and discuss this in more detail! What number can I reach you?"
- "I think it’ll be easier to do a conference call with the whole team, rather than a chain email. What’s your number so I can add you to the call?"
Ask when you're planning to meet in person.
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Mention that having their number would make it easier to coordinate. It's natural to exchange numbers if an emergency comes up or you need to confirm details for the get-together. Ask for a phone number once the meeting is penciled in, and saying "yes" will feel like a no-brainer to the other person.
- "So we're all set for a coffee meeting on Thursday. I'll give you my number so you can let me know if anything changes. Would you mind sending yours too?"
- "I’m looking forward to our lunch next week! What number can I reach you in case something changes?"
Give your phone number first.
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Take the first step to show them you're sincere and trustworthy. Leave the door open for the other person to text or call you, and let them know they're welcome to do so. That way, they can decide for themselves whether they want to contact you—and the fact that you’ve freely offered up your number will make you seem more credible in the other person’s eyes.
- "Call or text me at (555)-555-5555 if you're interested. I'd be thrilled to hear from you and discuss this further!"
- “If you have any questions or concerns, please give me a call! You can reach me at (555)-555-5555.”
- “I’d love to get your professional opinion on this project. If you have a moment, please call me at (555)-555-5555.”
Use a confident tone.
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The goal is to be compelling but not demanding. As long as you phrase your words respectfully, phrase your request as a statement and not a question. Basically, say something along the lines of, "Let's exchange numbers," rather than "Can I please have your number?" A confident message is more likely to inspire the recipient into action and get you the phone number.[5] X Research source
- "Thanks for meeting with me today. Let's exchange numbers so we can check in from time to time! You can reach me at (555)-555-5555."
- “I think it’d be easier to arrange this event over the phone. My number is (555)-555-5555, and I’m available for a call this afternoon.”
Say “thank you.”
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Politeness is key when asking for a phone number, and results in more success. It’s a good idea to include a quick “thank you in advance” when you first ask for your contact’s phone number, and then again once they give it to you. Show your appreciation for the other person’s help and willingness to work with you, and you might be surprised how quickly gratitude builds bridges in your professional life![6] X Research source
- "Would you send me a phone number so we can discuss this further? Thank you very much!"
- "I’d love to have a conversation over the phone sometime about this project. Let me know what number I can reach you at and we’ll set something up. Thank you in advance!"
- After getting the number, you could follow up with, "Thank you! Are you free tomorrow morning for a call?"
Re-read the email before you hit send.
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Proofread for anything that could come off poorly to another person. You might have the best intentions, but write something that sounds presumptuous or demanding to someone else who doesn't know you. You often miss important cues from tones, facial expressions, and body language. Consider the other person's perspective and how they might respond as you proofread.[7] X Research source
Be respectful if they say no.
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They might give you their number in the future, but only on their terms. If you push the issue or insist, the other person might cut off contact entirely. Gracefully agree to keep communicating with them via email and give them a chance to change their mind about exchanging phone numbers naturally. They'll appreciate your agreeable attitude!
- "That works for me! I'm happy to keep in touch over email if you prefer."
- "No problem, I understand. Let me know if you change your mind!"
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References
- ↑ https://www.businessinsider.com/email-etiquette-rules-every-professional-needs-to-know-2016-1
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2016/09/a-guide-to-cold-emailing
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-magic-human-connection/201503/how-ask-something-in-email
- ↑ https://hbr.org/2015/07/what-email-im-and-the-phone-are-each-good-for
- ↑ https://www.hercampus.com/school/notre-dame/7-ways-sound-more-confident-your-emails/
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-magic-human-connection/201503/how-ask-something-in-email
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/200604/avoiding-email-catastrophe