How to Look Sexy if You Are Big

Co-authored by Elle Monus

Last Updated: September 20, 2021 References

Sometimes society and the media tell women that they have to be skinny to be beautiful. This is completely untrue. Big girls and women can have a radiant sexiness, too. To look your sexiest, you’ll need to love your body, dress it well, and bring out your most confident self.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Having Sexy Style

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Embrace your curves. Don’t try to hide your tummy or drown your body in a sea of fabric. Wear clothes that are fitted to your shape.^{[1]
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Elle Monus
Image Consultant
Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.} Don’t be afraid to wear a bodycon dress or a form-fitting top.^{[2]
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Elle Monus
Image Consultant
Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.} Love your curves and show them off in your sexiest outfits. Take time to research your coloring, face shape, and body shape, so you can pick out styles and colors that bring out your natural beauty.^{[3]
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Elle Monus
Image Consultant
Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.} However, a fit and flare dress and a pair of heels will always be flattering.^{[4]
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- If you have an inverted triangle body shape, focus on creating volume on your bottom third to balance your body with A-line skirts and wide leg pants.^{[5]
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  Elle Monus
  Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.}
- If you have an hourglass body shape, make sure your fabric flows over any trouble spots instead of clinging to your body.^{[6]
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  Elle Monus
  Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.}
- If you have an apple body shape, try empire waist tops and jeggings to prevent the excess fabric on the hips and thighs.^{[7]
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  Expert Source
  
  Elle Monus
  Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.}
- If you have a rectangle body shape, you can wear almost anything! Experiment with a classic shift dress, as it can help you create a gorgeous retro-inspired look.^{[8]
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  Elle Monus
  Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.}
- If you have a pear body shape, you'll do well with a solid bottom and a bold top.^{[9]
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  Expert Source
  
  Elle Monus
  Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.}
2
Show some skin. Lots of plus-size models have been rocking crop tops lately; try a crop top that shows off a layer of skin a few inches above your belly paired with a pair of high-waisted jeans or a high-waisted skirt. You should show off whatever body part you love about yourself, whether it’s your stomach, your butt, or your legs. You’ll feel and look sexiest when you’re showing the skin you love.^{[10]
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3
Tailor your clothes. If you find a piece of clothing you love but it doesn’t fit quite perfectly, bring it to a tailor to have it fitted specifically for you. You can get some garments tailored for under $20. Sometimes it’s good to buy a few pieces of clothing that fit really well rather than having many pieces of clothing that don’t look quite right.^{[11]
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- It’s not your fault for not “fitting” into clothes; the garment should fit you!
4
Wear bold makeup. Go for a dramatic smoky eye with black eyeliner, dark eyeshadow, and mascara. Fill in or accentuate dark, bold eyebrows. Unless the bold, red lip makes you feel sexier, opt for a toned-down, subtle pink lip, where only the bottom lip is lined. Use blush from your cheekbone to your temple to define your face even more.^{[12]
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Accessorize subtly. Don’t feel the need to over-accessorize. Some stylists recommend going for a bold print instead of a statement necklace. Try wearing a subtle pair of earrings or a few thin rings. You could also wear a simple pendant if you are wearing a simple top with a high neckline.^{[13]
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- Of course, you can use accessories wisely to draw attention to where you want. For example, if you have a pear-shaped body, use a statement necklace to draw attention upwards, creating the illusion of balance.^{[14]
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  Expert Source
  
  Elle Monus
  Image Consultant
  Expert Interview. 7 September 2021.}

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Being Confident

1
Use good posture. Good posture helps you look and feel more confident. Pull your shoulders back, let your back be straight and tall, and be proud of who you are. Good posture can even up your testosterone, making you even more confident. You’ll feel more empowered, and you will act like it, too!^{[15]
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Think about your best moments. Picture a moment when you were your best self: captivating, confident, and sexy. Take a few minutes to breathe deeply and envision this moment. Think about how future situations, such as a party you plan to attend or a job interview you will have soon, could also involve your best self. You’ll feel and be more confident.^{[16]
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Look in the mirror and find things you love. When you look at yourself in the morning, find a few things you like about yourself. Consciously think about those things. You will focus more on the good parts of yourself than the parts of your body you’re not as happy about.^{[17]
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Don’t let negativity in. Society often criticizes big women for unfair reasons. They erroneously think that big women can’t be healthy, happy, or stylish. Understand that these comments are hurtful but not true. Find support from other plus-size women in your life to offset these negative comments with positivity and compliments.^{[18]
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Limit your exposure to unrealistic portrayals of women in media. Too often, the media show us only models and celebrities who are thin. Remember that most models are airbrushed, and their photos are retouched before they’re printed in magazines or put on the Internet. Follow some plus-size fashionistas on Instagram to get more style inspiration and see beautiful, plus-size women feeling beautiful in their skin. Look at body positivity campaigns, such as Selfridges’ “Incredible Machines” campaign^{[19]
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Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Taking Care of Your Body

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Eat healthy, yummy foods. You don’t have to live off of kale and quinoa, but you should nourish your body. Make a plan to eat healthy and try to stick to it. Here are some tips for making sure you have a balanced diet:
- Get about a third of your calories from proteins, like lean meat, nuts, and beans.
- Eat fruits and vegetables with every meal.
- Stay hydrated. Drink water as much as you can.
- Try not to drink too much alcohol.
- Eat what you want, but eat it all in moderation. You can have some ice cream, but keep the portion size relatively small.^{[21]
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2
Exercise three or four times per week. Even if you don’t want to lose weight, you will feel sexy and healthy if you commit to exercising a few times per week. Exercising is great for toning your body. You could try yoga, pilates, strength training, a spin class, a jog, or even a brisk walk If you can exercise for 20 to 30 minutes at once, you are in better shape than an unfit thin person. Just because you are plus-size does not mean that you can’t be in shape. Find ways to make exercise fun: walks with loved ones, backyard sports, playing in the pool, and hiking.
3
Sleep well. Good sleep can help to keep your memory sharp, make you more creative, help you live longer, prevent depression, and keep you at a healthy weight.^{[22]
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Research source} Make sure that you’re sleeping well every night. Here are some tips to help you sleep better:
- Take melatonin before you go to bed. Melatonin supplements naturally help you fall and stay asleep faster.
- Turn off all of your screens (cell phone included) an hour before you go to bed.
- Do not do anything in your bed except for sleep and have sex. If you’re watching TV or doing a crossword puzzle, move away from your bed.
- Don’t drink caffeine in the afternoon.^{[23]
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Community Q&A

Question

What if I want to look sexy for a boy who doesn't like me?

Community Answer

Focus on being sexy for yourself first. When you feel sexy, you'll look and feel more confident, which is a turn-on for many guys. If he still doesn't like you after that, don't take it personally and move on!
Question

What if nothing fits me right?

Community Answer

I have the same problem. Either it’s too big or too small. You can try to get it tailored or just keep trying different brands, and eventually you’ll find one with the right fit.
Question

Why do you need to be healthy?

Community Answer

To function well, be your best, and live fully. If you're not healthy, you will feel worse, look worse, have less energy, and your mind will not work as well as it could. And if you get really ill, you will have to waste a lot of time suffering and recovering from the illness instead of living your life.

Warnings

Remember that true beauty and sexiness comes from within, not from your appearance. Try not to fixate too much on outer beauty when inner beauty matters more.

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Before starting any form of exercise program, consult your doctor. This goes double if you have chronic health problems.

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