How to Have Hope

Co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS

Last Updated: January 14, 2023 References Approved

Do you often find yourself struggling to see any meaning or purpose in your day-to-day activities? Do you want to break out of bad habits but can’t find the desire to do so? Hope might seem like a vague word with perhaps little to no relevance to your life, but insofar as it means seeing the possibilities inherent to your life, it might just be a necessary precursor for you to get out of any rut you might find yourself in. Follow these steps below to get on your way to seeing more possibilities in your everyday life circumstances.

Method 1

Method 1 of 4:

Envisioning Your Life

1
Figure out how you want your life to look. People often struggle to hope for a better tomorrow because they don’t know what it might look like. Before you can have hope it might be necessary to first figure out what type of life you imagine as the most desirable. Take some time to consider your ideal life and what it would include.^{[1]
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- Ask yourself: “If I could wake up tomorrow and have any life, what would it be like?” Think about as many details as possible. What would your house look like? What would your friends be like? What kind of activities would you participate in?
- You may find it helpful to write out your vision for your life so that you can review it and revisit it from time to time.
2
Compare your ideal vision to your present life circumstances. After you figure out what kind of life you would like to have in an ideal world, compare that life to your present life circumstances. Doing so can help you to determine what areas of your life are already in line with your vision, or if you are headed in the right direction.
- For example, if you envision yourself 40 pounds thinner, consider what you are doing right now to get you to that goal. Are you eating healthy foods? Controlling your portions? Exercising regularly? What do you need to move closer to your vision?
- As you reflect on your life, consider your current circumstances. Have any of the aspects of your ideal vision already been manifested in your life?
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3
Consider whether you have realistic or unrealistic expectations for your life. In order to have hope, it is important to make sure that the vision you have for yourself is realistic. If your vision is not realistic, it may cause you to feel hopeless. Consider your vision for your life and try to determine if your vision is realistic. If not, you may need to make some adjustments so that your vision is something that you can achieve.
- For example, imagine your vision is to be a millionaire, but you don’t know what type of job you would want to get you there. In this case, you should consider starting with goals that are more relevant to your current life conditions.
4
Set some goals for yourself. Having goals to work towards is one of the best ways to have hope. After you have developed a vision for your life, take time to set some goals. Write your goals out and work hard to achieve them. To improve your chances of reaching your goals, make sure that the goals you set are SMART goals. This acronym stands for the following features:^{[2]
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- Specific—the goal is targeted rather than broad and/or vague
- Measurable—the goal can be quantified (measured with numbers)
- Action Oriented—the goal is something that you can actively work towards and control
- Realistic-the goal is something you can actually achieve with the resources available to you
- Time Bound—the goal has a beginning and ending or a deadline that you will hold yourself to

Method 2

Method 2 of 4:

Developing Hope

1
Acknowledge your strengths. Some people may lack hope because they feel like they are not good at anything. If you have been feeling this type of hopelessness, try making a list of all of your strengths and accomplishments. Read through the list and congratulate yourself for these positive traits. Giving yourself a little pat on the back now and then will help you to develop your hope for the future.^{[3]
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2
Cultivate supportive relationships. As much as possible, surround yourself with supportive and capable people. Strive to surround yourself with those people who help you to feel good and encourage you to be your best. Having a supportive network of friends will help you to further your interests and goals. It’s much easier to find hope within a strong community as opposed to completely on your own.
- Look at the activities and attitudes of people around you. See if any of them can serve as role models for what you would like to accomplish for yourself. Also, consider how the people around you act and make you feel.
3
Engage in pleasurable activities. Doing things that you enjoy can also help you to develop your sense of hope. By engaging in activities that make you happy every day, you will have a greater sense of purpose. If you are not sure about what activities bring you the most joy, try out some new things to figure it out. Take a class at your local community college, try a new sport, learn a new skill, or take up a new hobby.
4
Get involved with a cause. Getting involved in a cause in your community can be a great way to cultivate hope towards the future. This can be in either your local community or even an online community, but either way the essential point of departure here is building relationships with others over common goals or projects. Involving yourself with other people who share your interests can help you to overcome alienation, which can cause a feeling of hopelessness.^{[4]
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- Get involved in local politics or join an online forum discussion on some world affair you might be passionate about. The more you do this the easier it will be.
- Consider volunteer work. Some studies have shown that volunteering has a wide range of benefits for your mental and physical health.^{[5]
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5
Put yourself in more diverse situations. Always staying within your comfort zone may cause you to feel hopeless and depressed. However, putting yourself in situations that make you uncomfortable may help you to move past hopelessness and other negative emotions.^{[6]
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Research source} Getting out of your comfort zone is essential to changing your thought patterns and learning to approach the world with more hope.^{[7]
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- Search for activities in your life that put you within that window between feeling only slightly uncomfortable and being entirely overwhelmed by your anxiety altogether. These will usually be the best times for you to grow and develop your sense of hope. For example, you could try going out with coworkers after work if you typically go straight home.
6
Keep track of your thoughts and feelings in a journal. Journaling can help you to understand why you have been feeling hopeless and it is also a great way to relieve stress. To get started with journaling, choose a comfortable place and plan to devote about 20 minutes per day to writing. Start by writing about how you are feeling, what you are thinking, or whatever you want. You can also use your journal to record your progress toward your goals.
- Try keeping a gratitude diary. Every night, think of three things you are grateful for and write them down. Doing this every day will help you to develop a more hopeful outlook and it can also help you to sleep better and enjoy better health.^{[8]
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  Greater Good Magazine
  Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living
  Go to source}
7
Take care of yourself. Exercise, eat healthy food, get plenty of rest, and relax. Doing these things will help you to develop a sense of hope. By taking good care of yourself, you are sending your mind signals that you deserve to be happy and treated well. Make sure that you are devoting enough time to meeting your basic needs for exercise, food, sleep, and relaxation.^{[9]
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- Exercise regularly. Try to get 30 minutes of moderate exercise per day.
- Eat a balanced diet of healthy foods like fruit, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins.
- Get 7-9 hours of sleep per night.
- Set aside at least 15 minutes per day to relax. Practice yoga, do deep breathing exercises, or meditate.
- Drink 8 glasses of water per day.

Method 3

Method 3 of 4:

Dealing with Anxiety and Hopelessness

1
Identify symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). People with PTSD often experience hopelessness, among other symptoms. Consider whether you might be suffering from PTSD and talk to a mental health professional if you suspect that you are. Some of the common types of PTSD and their corresponding symptoms include:^{[10]
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- Hyperarousal: irritability, agitation, difficulty sleeping, difficulty concentrating, feelings of panic, always ready to attack or respond
- Re-experiencing: nightmares, intrusive memories, and flashbacks, experiencing physical symptoms of a traumatic event, extra-sensitive to reminders of trauma
- Numbing: feeling disconnected or robotic, losing interest in people and activities, feeling hopeless, isolated, and/or depressed, avoiding thinking about people associated with trauma
2
Address your anxiety about the future. Research has shown that having unrealistic expectations for yourself—in a sense, having “false hope”—can produce anxiety.^{[11]
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Trustworthy Source
Nature
Respected Multidisciplinary Scientific Journal
Go to source} This anxiety can make it difficult to see the opportunities that are available to you. Unchecked anxiety can hinder your progress and make you feel less hopeful. In order to create realistic hope, as opposed to “false hope,” you need to learn to deal with your anxiety.
- Try practicing systematic desensitization. Systematic desensitization eases people into distressing situations so that they can feel more comfortable with them. Start by learning basic relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing exercises or meditation. Then, perform such techniques in situations that make you uncomfortable.^{[12]
  X
  Trustworthy Source
  Simply Psychology
  Popular site for evidence-based psychology information
  Go to source} For example, if you start to feel anxious when thinking about plans for tomorrow, concentrate on your breath and regulate it as you imagine possibilities for yourself.
- As you become less anxious about situations that make you a little bit uncomfortable, challenge yourself to practice relaxation techniques in situations that make you feel more anxious. Keep progressing until you have tackled the situation that produces the most anxiety for you.
3
Notice when lack of hope becomes all-pervading hopelessness. Almost everyone experiences anxiety in certain situations or feels sad during short periods of their life. These can be helpful reactions to certain unhealthy things in life. But when these feelings start to become attached to everything in your surroundings, it could be an indication of something more serious, such as an anxiety disorder or depression.
- Try to address the patterns of thinking that have been keeping you down by talking to someone about how you have been feeling. Consider seeing a therapist or mental health counselor, or even a mental health support group.
- When your anxiety or depression is associated with something or someone in your life, it might be necessary to make an extreme change, such as moving to a new location or simply away from the person who has been bothering you. Get feedback from other people in your community who you trust before making any decisions that might drastically change your life.
4
Consider visiting a mental health professional. If you happen to experience a high degree of anxiety, or just can’t seem to break out of an unhealthy habit or thought pattern, seeing a professional therapist could help get you moving in the right direction. They can offer you helpful psychological tools and/or techniques, which might help you to overcome your unique obstacles. This can be especially helpful if you keep feeling frustrated with your life after multiple failed attempts to change it.

Method 4

Method 4 of 4:

Understanding Hope

1
Think about what it means to have hope. Hope is an attitude that you work to achieve every day. It is not a permanent state of mind. One definition of hope used by some psychologists is “a positive motivational state that is based on an interactively derived sense of successful (a) agency (goal-directed energy) and (b) pathways (planning to meet goals).” Hope is the result of doing things that bring us pleasure and help us reach our goals.^{[13]
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2
Realize that you need to work on your attitude every day. Don’t expect yourself to become more hopeful all of a sudden, as if there’s a switch you can simply turn on or off. Becoming hopeful requires you to work on your attitude every day. Take this process one day at a time and focus your attention on the aspects of your life that you actually have control over.^{[14]
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- For example, if you lack hope regarding your ability to find a job. Don’t dwell on what you cannot control, such as who calls you for an interview. Start thinking about what you can control, such as how many jobs you apply to. Take small steps to build your hope up every day by working on the things you can control.
3
Learn to challenge your negative thoughts rather than ignore them. To have hope, it is important to work on your ability to deal with negative thoughts and stop letting them get the better of you. By learning to engage with difficult emotions when they arise, as opposed to ignoring them, you can begin to understand why you are having those feelings. Understanding your feelings will help you to deal with them in a constructive manner, rather than allow them to overtake you.^{[15]
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- For example, if you notice that you get discouraged about your weight loss progress sometimes, think about what is causing you to feel that way. Are you comparing yourself to other people? Are you not losing weight as fast as you hoped you would? Try to identify the source of your discouragement become more aware of the reason for these thoughts.
4
Recognize that you need to be resilient in challenging situations. In order to cultivate a sense of hope, you need to learn how to function in situations that cause you distress and derail your sense of motivation. Research has found that learning to be more comfortable in threatening situations can actually reduce the risk for physical health problems and improve overall psychological functioning.^{[16]
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PubMed Central
Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health
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- A strong social support system and feeling confident in your abilities are also necessary to develop a sense of resilience.

Warnings

Hopelessness may be a symptom of depression or another mental health problem. Get help as soon as possible if you are feeling hopeless and the feelings don’t seem to be getting better.

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If you are feeling suicidal, get help immediately! If you do not know where to turn, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 988. ^{[17]
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Trustworthy Source
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Suicide prevention network operating a toll-free 24/7 hotline for anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts or emotional distress
Go to source}

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