How to Go to a Party Alone Without Feeling Weird About It

Co-authored by Tracy Carver, PhD and Hannah Madden

Last Updated: February 16, 2022 References

If there’s a party you really want to go to but none of your friends can make it, you don’t have to miss out! Going to a party by yourself can be just as fun as going with friends (if not moreso). While it might feel a little strange at first, you can reframe your thinking and change your mindset so you don’t feel weird about showing up solo to any event.

1

Remind yourself that you belong there.

Give yourself a little pep talk before you head out the door. You’re going to a party alone, and that’s okay! No one’s going to think you’re creepy or weird—and they probably won’t notice you at all.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Tracy Carver, PhD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 12 January 2021.} You have as much of a right to be at that party as anyone else.^{[2]
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- If people do notice that you’re alone, they’ll probably envy your confidence. Many people struggle with going out by themselves, so good for you!

2

Wear an interesting outfit.

Your clothing can be a great conversation starter. Plus, wearing something that makes you stand out will make you feel more confident! Throw on a fun statement piece that people might compliment, like a patterned shirt or a fun hat.^{[3]
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- If anyone gives you a compliment, say something like, “Thanks! I found it while thrifting the other day.” That way, it could segue into a conversation.
- If you don’t want to stand out, you don’t have to put on a statement piece.

3

Look for familiar faces.

Is there anyone at the party you might know? Even if they’re a friend of a friend, you could still grab them for a quick chat to say hello. Scan the party for any familiar faces, and go over to see how they’re doing.^{[4]
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- If it’s someone you’ve only met a few times, try leading with something like, “Hey, Tim! It’s Allen, remember me? We met at Jessica’s party a few weeks back.”
- You could also make a beeline for the party host, who you probably know. Offer to help them hand out drinks or make sure everyone has a snack to eat.

4

Calm your nerves with a drink.

It will also give your hands something to do. When you first head to the party, grab a drink and sip on it throughout the night. You don’t need to get wasted if you don’t want to, but it might help to have a drink or two before the night really gets started.^{[5]
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- If you are planning on getting drunk, make sure you have a safe ride home. Drinking on your own is slightly more dangerous than doing it with friends, so use your best judgement.

5

Put your phone away.

Try not to spend all your time looking down at your cell. You’ll seem closed off, and no one wants to approach someone who looks busy. Although it might feel weird, put your phone away and only get it out to take pics or send a quick text.^{[6]
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- You’ll look more approachable and nice if you keep open body language by standing up straight, not crossing your arms, and keeping your head up.

6

Approach other people who are alone.

It’s slightly less intimidating than a group of people. If you spot anyone at the party who’s also by themselves, head on over and start a conversation! Give them a compliment, talk about the music playing, or simply introduce yourself. Chances are, they’ll be grateful to have someone to talk to, too.^{[7]
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- You could say something like, “Hey, I like your shoes! That neon yellow really stands out. I’m Ashley, by the way.”
- If you can’t spot anyone who’s alone, try going for people standing in groups of 2 or 3.

7

Dive into small talk.

It’s the best way to make conversation with strangers. Talk about the weather, see where they grew up, and simply get to know the people around you a little more. Some quality conversation starts include:^{[8]
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- “Did you grow up around here?”
- “How do you know the party host?”
- “Oh, I love this song! Have you heard of this band before?”
- “Where’d you get that scarf? It’s beautiful!”

8

Be nonchalant about the fact that you’re alone.

If anyone asks, there’s no need to lie. Going out alone isn’t a big deal, and tons of people do it all the time.^{[9]
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Expert Source

Tracy Carver, PhD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 12 January 2021.} People might ask about who you’re here with, so it’s best to have an answer prepared, like:^{[10]
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- “I’m just here on my own. All my friends were busy, but I didn’t want to miss it!”
- “Yeah, none of my friends could make it tonight. I thought I’d head out on my own for once.”

9

Talk to multiple groups of people.

Try not to latch onto one person all night. While it might feel more comfortable to hang around the first person you chatted with, the whole point of going out alone is to meet new people! Try to mingle and talk to as many people as you can before the night is over.^{[11]
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- It’s better to leave your conversation partner wanting more than to overstay your welcome. If they start looking bored or glancing around the room, just tell them you’ll see them later.

10

Just have fun!

You don’t have to worry about anyone besides yourself. When you go to parties alone, you can do whatever you want, stay as long as you want, and leave as soon as you get bored. Try to embrace the freedom of being out alone, and just focus on having a good time.^{[12]
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- You never know—you might even have more fun heading out alone than you would with a group of people.