How to Feel Beautiful when You Don't Look It

Last Updated: December 15, 2021 References

Even the most confident people sometimes feel like they don't look their best. If you're having one of those days, we're here with our favorite tips to help you feel more beautiful inside and out!

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Rethinking Your Idea of Beautiful

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Focus on the positives. Look at what you do have, and the features you like the most about yourself. By focusing on the positives about yourself, you'll be reminded of your beauty and you'll begin to change your self-image, or the way you view yourself. Intentionally focusing on your positive qualities will help develop a confident attitude and an appreciation of your own worth.^{[1]
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Research source}
- Consider what you think is your best physical feature. Your eyes? Your figure? Your hair? Identify what your best features are, and try to be excited about those instead of upset about what you don't have.
2
Pick your best personality traits. Think about qualities you like about yourself that are not visible. Qualities that are part of who you are, part of your personality have the potential to show more beauty than your outward appearance.^{[2]
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Research source} Show the world the beauty in you that they cannot see. Here are some incredibly beautiful qualities to possess:
- Intelligence
- Sense of humor
- Kindness
- Courage
- Elegance
- Honesty
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3
Accept that you are human. You will have flaws or imperfections, everyone does, it is part of being human. Know; however, that something you consider a flaw, someone else may consider their favorite feature of yours! Begin to learn to love your imperfections. They are what make you, you!
4
Start an inner makeover. Most often the central factor in the idea of beauty is focused on your outward appearance. It is not surprising, then, to find a dissatisfaction with the body occurring in about 80% if women ages 18 to 40 years old.^{[3]
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Research source} Oftentimes, this dissatisfaction can lead to a desire to makeover their physical appearance. The problem, however may be more than skin-deep. Work on doing an inner-makeover first and change the way you view yourself from the inside out.
- Replace any negative or critical self-thinking with positive thoughts about the different ways you attract people. Instead of thinking, “My nose is too large” maybe think, “People tell me how beautiful my eyes are all the time.”^{[4]
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Be kind to yourself. Think of yourself as a friend who is feeling the same way. What would you say to her if she told you she didn't feel beautiful? How would you help show her the parts of her you thought were amazing? You deserve to treat yourself as well as you treat your friends.^{[5]
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Expert Source

Jennifer Butler, MSW
Love & Empowerment Coach
Expert Interview. 31 July 2020.}
- If you are struggling, try repeating affirmations or mantras to yourself, such as:
  - "I radiate beauty, charm, and grace."^{[6]
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  - "I am strong, I am beautiful, I am enough."^{[7]
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  - "My body is healthy; my mind is brilliant; my soul is tranquil."^{[8]
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6
Celebrate your uniqueness. Realize that everyone has something unique to only them. It's true, one girl may be tall and blond, but she can never be just like you. Maybe you're petite and brunette, that's something she could never be. Celebrate your uniqueness by picking out the qualities you possess that help you stand out in a crowd.^{[9]
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Reflect on your relationships. It is important to have people in your life who encourage and support you.^{[10]
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Research source} Anyone who makes you feel you are not unique, awesome, and gorgeous; is not worth your time. It's possible they just don't know you, or maybe they are struggling with their own self image, but you deserve to be around people that are good for you and good to you. Try to portray the attractive person you are on the inside to the outside world.^{[11]
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Research source} You will naturally attract those that lift you up and make you feel more beautiful!

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Changing Your Appearance

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Make a change. Maybe you are feeling you just don't love the way you look. It may be less about not feeling beautiful and more an indication that you are restless and could use a change.^{[12]
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Research source} Consider what you are unsatisfied with, or if you are not particularly unsatisfied, what you would like to alter to switch things up!.
- Change what you can. Maybe you dislike the baggy area under your eyes. An easy solution would be to get some good sleep and maybe splurge for under eye spa cream or a new concealer. You'll be rested and you'll feel pampered.
2
Draw attention away. Maybe you are unhappy with something that you cannot easily change, like the shape of your nose or the size of your ears. Change something that will draw the attention to a feature you do like. If you have great lips, put on some bright red lipstick. ^{[13]
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3
Get a new haircut or style. One of the easiest changes you can make which can have a big impact on how you feel about your appearance, is to change your hair. You can change the color, the cut, the style, or add fun accessories. ^{[14]
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Research source} Whatever you decide to do make sure that you invest the time and the money to do it right. Make sure you go to a good salon or someone you trust, so it can be just the way you want.
4
Get healthy. If you are unhappy with your body, then pick up a new fitness hobby. Picking up a new fitness hobby will help you reshape your body, learn what a powerhouse you can be, and will keep you healthy. Choose a fitness hobby that you like or maybe one you consider fun, such as aerial yoga or rock climbing. The more you enjoy it, the more likely you will be to continue to do it.
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Change your wardrobe. Changing your clothes or your clothing style is another way to have a big impact on your appearance and on your confidence.^{[15]
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Research source} Start by getting rid of anything that doesn't fit well or doesn't make you feel beautiful.^{[16]
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Research source} You've worked on changing your idea of beauty from the inside, now let your outside reflect those changes. So go for what makes you feel comfortable and beautiful.
- If you don't have the money to buy new clothes, don't worry. You don't need a totally new wardrobe, you just have to get creative. Think or new combinations to change your normal look. Keep trying on different combinations until you're happy with the new style!
- If you are still not feeling the best about your new style, try adding in some new accessories like jewelry or new materials (maybe leather bracelets or metals) to your style.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Doing What Makes You Feel Beautiful

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Donate your time. Feeling beautiful extends past just what you wear or how you look. You can also participate in activities that can make you feel like a beautiful person inside and out. Refocus your attention on helping those in need by donating your time. You will be able to reap the benefits of helping others and it may help you gain perspective on how you are feeling about yourself.
- You could even combine the two and volunteer for something like the Look Good Feel Better program through the American Cancer Society that helps patients learn beauty techniques in order to feel better about themselves during their cancer treatment.^{[17]
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  Trustworthy Source
  American Cancer Society
  Nonprofit devoted to promoting cancer research, education, and support
  Go to source}
2
Dance. Dancing is a great way to get moving and get working on feeling comfortable in your own body. Studies have shown that dancing can make you feel beautiful as well as be fundamental to your sense of well-being.^{[18]
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Research source} It is a great form of exercise and self-expression that can help you feel more confident.^{[19]
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Research source} Dancing will help you:
- Realize what your beautiful body is capable of.
- Practice graceful and fluid movements.
- Get an endorphin rush from the exercise.
- Straighten your posture and confidently hold your head up high.
3
Spend time with your friends. What could make you feel more beautiful then spending time with people who think you are amazing? You may have friends who are struggling with the same thoughts, and talking about it may even bring you closer together. Nothing is more beautiful than friends lifting each other up when they are down, so let your friends help you rediscover the beautiful qualities you possess.