How to Attract Boys

Co-authored by Mark Rosenfeld

Last Updated: November 11, 2022 References

Getting a boy to talk to you and like you might seem like an impossible task, especially if he’s shy. However, you can attract boys by showing off your positive attitude, talking to them, and being confident in yourself. Attracting boys is easy when you know what they’re looking for in a girl!

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Dressing Attractively

1
Think about what kind of style you’d like to have. Your style can show people your interests and give them a preview of your personality. There are plenty of different styles to choose from, including preppy, sporty, edgy, hipster, and many more. Look for clothes that you like online and try to come up with a style that fits your personality.^{[1]
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- If your style doesn’t fit into a category, that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with being unique! The most important thing is that you’re comfortable in confident in what you wear.
2
Consider what you’ll be doing during the day when you get dressed in the morning. Think about your plans for the day and any activities that you have going on. Sometimes, being too dressed up can come off as intimidating to boys. Try to keep your outfits casual unless it’s a special occasion like a dance or party.^{[2]
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- If you’re playing volleyball in gym class, it’s probably not the best day to wear a dress to school.
- If you’re worried about being over-dressed, ask your friends what they’re planning on wearing. This will give you a better idea of what everyone else is doing and keep you from sticking out.
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3
Wear clothes that fit you well and feel comfortable. When it comes to fashion, you can find clothes for your body no matter what size you are. The number on the tag isn’t important as long as the clothes fit, and you feel comfortable and confident in them. When you’re shopping, always try on your clothes before you buy them, and ask a friend or your parent what they think.^{[3]
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- Make sure your clothes fit the dress code for your school and aren’t too revealing. That includes making sure your shirts aren’t too tight or low-cut and shorts and skirts are long enough.
- If you’re shopping for tops, make sure they aren’t too tight and that you can freely move your arms up and down. Check to make sure long sleeves hit around your wrist.
- If you’re buying jeans, make sure the button and zipper lay flat against your body when fastened. In the dressing room, touch your toes and bend your knees to make sure you can move around in them. If the waist is a little big but everywhere else fits, consider getting a belt.
- When shopping for special occasions, like a dance, keep in mind that you can normally have dresses altered to fit your body better. Very few people fit perfectly into dresses without some kind of alteration!
4
Style your hair in a way that is comfortable and makes you feel pretty. In the mornings, wash and dry your hair before styling it for the day. If you like your natural hair, leave it down after drying it. Curling your hair is a great way to draw attention to your beautiful hair, especially if you normally wear it straight! The most important part is that you feel happy with how it looks.^{[4]
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- For a quick and easy look, pull your hair into a high ponytail or a braid if you have long hair.
- If you have shorter hair, a headband can keep your hair out of your face.
5
Wear makeup that highlights your natural beauty. Most boys don’t really understand makeup, but it can be helpful for giving yourself some confidence. If you have a blemish on your face, you can cover it with some concealer. To draw attention to your eyes, apply a swipe or two of mascara.^{[5]
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- Products like brightly colored eyeshadow or bold lipstick can be intimidating to boys, so it’s better to show off your natural beauty.
- If you have issues with your skin, like redness or acne, don’t worry. Plenty of girls deal with these problems, and most of them can be taken care of by making a skincare routine that includes cleanser, spot treatment, and moisturizer.
6
Take care of your body. One of the best ways to attract boys is by making sure you’re clean and look nice. Make sure you shower every day, wear deodorant, brush your teeth, exercise, and eat a healthy diet. Getting enough sleep at night and drinking water will also help to improve your skin and mood throughout the day.
- Men are attracted to all different types of women, so don’t worry so much about losing weight to fit the idea of a pretty girl in your mind. As long as you’re staying healthy and you’re confident in yourself, boys will like you!

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Having an Attractive Attitude

1
Smile to make yourself look open and approachable. Smiling is scientifically proven to cause boys to find you more beautiful, especially in situations where you want him to approach you.^{[6]
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Expert Source

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 11 June 2021.} If you want to talk to a guy, smile at him to let him know that you’re interested in him and are happy to talk.^{[7]
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- Don’t feel like you have to be happy all the time, though. It’s okay to have other emotions, and you don’t have to smile if you don’t feel like it.
2
Exhibit confidence with your attitude, intelligence, and appearance. Sitting up straight and making eye contact will show boys that you’re confident in yourself. When you’re speaking, talk clearly and loud enough so that he can hear you. If you’re talking about something that you’re passionate about, let your knowledge show!^{[8]
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- If you’re shy when it comes to meeting new people, focus on listening and responding to what the guy you’re interested in is saying. Remember that you’re smart and funny, and he’ll be able to see it, too!
- Avoid bragging about your accomplishments or skills in front of boys. This can be intimidating to them and make them feel inadequate. You can bring up your achievements, but be sure to involve other people in the conversation as well!
3
Be open-minded and respectful when having a conversation. Everyone is attracted to people who are open to new experiences and information. If you’re talking to a guy about something that you disagree on, listen to what he has to say and encourage him to listen to your point of view. Keeping an open mind is especially important when it comes to meeting new people.^{[9]
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- This doesn’t mean that you have to change your opinion whenever you disagree with a boy about something. Just be sure to be respectful of their point of view, even if you strongly disagree.
4
Avoid drama and gossip between your friends and other guys. Boys tend to find gossip and drama unnecessary and confusing. If your friends are fighting or you don’t like one of your exes, try to avoid talking about it at first. Sometimes, boys think that if you have drama with other people, you’ll have it with them too.^{[10]
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- Having positive and happy friendships is a sign to guys that you’re able to have good relationships. Even if you’re currently having drama with your friends, try to focus on the positive things about your friendship!

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Getting a Boy to Like You

1
Give him a compliment on something that you like about him. Being nice is a great way to make a boy feel more comfortable around you. Keep your compliments genuine and specific, and say them with a smile so he knows that you aren’t teasing him. Sometimes, it’s better to give compliments when you’re hanging out alone, to keep other people from making fun.^{[11]
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- For example, if you’re both into sports, you can say something like “I like your Lebron James jersey, did you watch the game last night?”
- If you’re working on a school project together, let him know that you admire his intelligence by saying something like “That’s a great idea, I would’ve never thought of that!”
2
Ask him questions about his hobbies and interests. Focus on asking questions that require an explanation, not just a “yes” or a “no.” If you know you have a common interest, like music or sports, ask him questions to lead him into a conversation.^{[12]
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Expert Source

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 11 June 2021.} Let him do the talking while you listen and throw in some comments here and there.^{[13]
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- This is the best way to get to know a guy to see if you could actually like him beyond just a crush.
- Letting him talk will show him that you’re interested in getting to know him better and that you’re a good listener.
3
Let your personality shine in your conversations. Think about how you act around your girlfriends and how easily you can talk to them. Try to act the same way around the boy that you like by talking about things you both are interested in, like music, sports, or movies. Share your opinions and thoughts freely so he can get to know the real you.^{[14]
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- If a guy seems less interested after you start talking to him, don’t worry about it. That just means that he’s not a good fit for you.
4
Make an excuse to touch his arm or hand. Body language and touching are a great way to communicate to a guy that you like him without outwardly saying something. Sit close to him so that your knees are touching, and reach out to touch his arm or leg when he says something funny.^{[15]
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Expert Source

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 11 June 2021.} This can signal to a guy that you’re interested in him as more than just a friend.^{[16]
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- Avoid doing anything too overt, like grabbing his hand out of nowhere. This can scare him or make him think that you have the wrong impression about your relationship. Smaller gestures are better for figuring out how he feels.
5
Send him a text or like his posts on Instagram and Twitter. It might seem simple, but guys are surprised when girls are confident enough to show interest in a public way, like on social media. Even a quick text to let him know that you saw something that made you think of him can ensure that you’re on his mind, too!^{[17]
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- Sending a text can even start a whole conversation that can bring you closer together and give you something to talk about in person. Keep your texts light and flirty until you’re able to hang out with him and see how he’s feeling.
- Be careful not to bombard him with notifications by sending multiple text messages in a row or liking more than 2 posts at a time. When responding to texts, send 1-2 messages as your response and then wait for him to answer.
6
Make time to be alone together. Boys can sometimes act different when they’re alone with you. Ask him to partner with you for a project or even just talk to him between classes. This will give you time to see how he feels about you when no one is around, and gives him the opportunity to ask you out.
- Most guys won’t ask out a girl in front their friends because they’ll be embarrassed if you say no in front of everyone. Alone time gives him a chance to talk to you without all of the pressure.

Conversation Help

Positive Interactions with Boys

Ways to Catch a Guy's Eye

Expert Q&A

Question

What do men find most attractive in a woman?

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Mark Rosenfeld is a Dating and Relationship Coach for women and founded Make Him Yours in 2015. Mark specializes in helping people find, attract, and keep extraordinary relationships. He has been featured in Style Magazine, Thought Catalog, Elite Daily, News.com.au, and The Good Men Project. Mark’s dating videos have received over 60 million views, and his book “Make Him Yours – Beating the Odds of Modern Dating” was a best-seller on Amazon on its release.

Mark Rosenfeld

Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Answer

Men find it attractive when women set boundaries and standards for themselves. Men want to be able to respect the woman that they're with, but it's hard to do that when women don't expect to be treated well.
Question

What do men want from women?

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Mark Rosenfeld is a Dating and Relationship Coach for women and founded Make Him Yours in 2015. Mark specializes in helping people find, attract, and keep extraordinary relationships. He has been featured in Style Magazine, Thought Catalog, Elite Daily, News.com.au, and The Good Men Project. Mark’s dating videos have received over 60 million views, and his book “Make Him Yours – Beating the Odds of Modern Dating” was a best-seller on Amazon on its release.

Mark Rosenfeld

Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Answer

Men want women who have their own lives. It's important for women to have their own priorities outside of a relationship, like getting exercise or spending time with friends.
Question

How can I be more attractive?

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Mark Rosenfeld is a Dating and Relationship Coach for women and founded Make Him Yours in 2015. Mark specializes in helping people find, attract, and keep extraordinary relationships. He has been featured in Style Magazine, Thought Catalog, Elite Daily, News.com.au, and The Good Men Project. Mark’s dating videos have received over 60 million views, and his book “Make Him Yours – Beating the Odds of Modern Dating” was a best-seller on Amazon on its release.

Mark Rosenfeld

Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Answer

Take responsibility for your actions; unless you're very codependent, it's hard to really respect someone who plays the victim in their own life. Also, try to surround yourself with a grateful, enthusiastic, and positive energy.