It can be a little hard to know what to say when you get a “hey you” text from a guy. The best way to respond depends on a lot of things, like how well you know him, what his usual texting style is like, and whether you’re really interested in talking to him. In this article, we’ll give you a few tips on how to deal with this type of text.

This article is based on an interview with our professional dating coach and licensed social worker, Julianne Cantarella. Check out the full interview here.

1

Say “hey” back to keep things simple.

  1. Sometimes, the simplest response is best. A “hey” or “hey you” text is pretty low-effort, so it can be a little disappointing to get one of these. Give him a taste of his own medicine and put the burden of starting a real conversation back on him. If he’s really interested in talking to you, he’ll probably come out of his shell and say something a little more engaging.[1]
    • Responding back with a simple “Hey!” shows that you are interested in talking to him. However, at the same time, it lets him know that you expect him to put in a little more work.
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5

Respond with an emoji.

  1. Emojis are a good fallback when you don’t know what to say. You can’t actually use facial expressions or body language to communicate over text, but emojis can be a helpful alternative.[3] They can be playful and flirty if you’re into him, but they can also express confusion or frustration if you’re befuddled by his low-effort texting. For instance, send something like:
    • A heart, a wink, or a kissy face if you’re in a flirty mood.
    • A “meh” emoji if you want to convey that you’re not impressed.
    • A simple smile to show friendly interest.
    • A thinking or puzzled emoji to show that you’re not sure how to respond.
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9

Ask him a question to get the convo rolling.

10

Continue your chat over the phone.

  1. Talking over text can be a bit limiting. If you’re really interested in chatting with the guy, see if he’s willing to take it to the next level. Ask if you can give him a call, or bring up the possibility of meeting in person.[9]
    • Say something like, “I’m not super into texting, actually. Could we chat over the phone?” Or, “It would be cool to see your face. Want to take this to FaceTime?”
    • You could also say something like, “I’ve really enjoyed texting with you over the past few weeks. I’d love to get together in person! What would you say to hanging out this weekend?”
11

Watch for signs of “breadcrumbing.”

  1. Does he go days or weeks without contacting you? If so, a “hey, you” text out of the blue could be a sign that he’s stringing you along—especially if it doesn’t lead to a real conversation. If it seems like he’s not willing to put a lot of effort into your relationship (or friendship), consider moving on.[10] Other signs of “breadcrumbing” include:[11]
    • Occasionally liking your posts on social media, but never bothering to reach out for a conversation.
    • Not making any effort to meet up with you or move the relationship forward.
    • Constantly making excuses not to see you or talk to you.
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12

Call him on it if it bothers you.

  1. Julianne Cantarella. Dating & Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.
  2. https://www.today.com/health/breadcrumbing-what-it-how-spot-it-t107900
  3. https://www.today.com/health/breadcrumbing-what-it-how-spot-it-t107900
  4. Julianne Cantarella. Dating & Relationship Coach. Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.
  5. https://www.today.com/health/breadcrumbing-what-it-how-spot-it-t107900

About This Article

Julianne Cantarella
Written by:
Dating & Relationship Coach
This article was written by Julianne Cantarella and by wikiHow staff writer, Megaera Lorenz, PhD. Julianne Cantarella is a Dating Coach, Certified Life Coach, Licensed Social Worker, and the CEO and President of New Jersey's Matchmaker. With over a decade of experience, she specializes in helping women heal from a heartbreak and create healthy long-term relationships. Julianne created a comprehensive transformational date coaching program From First Date to Soulmate™ that has helped hundreds of women find love. She holds a Bachelor of Social Work (BSW) from Ramapo College of New Jersey and a Master of Social Work (MSW) from Fordham University. Julianne has contributed to numerous media such as Your Tango Online Magazine, 24Seven Wellness Magazine, and Talk of The Town Magazine. She has also been featured as a relationship expert on CBS, iHeartRadio, and PBS “This Emotional Life Project.” This article has been viewed 178,909 times.
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Co-authors: 9
Updated: August 31, 2022
Views: 178,909
Categories: Texting
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