How to Prevent Your Teen from Joining a Gang

Talk to your teen about gangs. Education is key to keeping your teen from joining a gang. Take time to sit down and talk to your teen about the dangers of gangs.^[3]

• Be as frank as possible when discussing gangs with your teens. Explain that, short term, gang activity can lead to trouble with police, trouble with school, and poor relationships with family members. Longterm, make sure your teen knows gang activity can prevent them having access to education and employment options, time in jail, and a risk to their personal safety and the personal safety of their family and friends.
• Listen as well. Your teen may be compelled to argue or even disregard what you're saying. Try to understand why your teen is resisting. Is he or she being intimidated by a gang? Is a person your teen looks up to in a gang? Understanding the reasons gang membership is appealing to teens can help you better address the problem.

Keep your teen engaged in other activities. Teens often join gangs for a sense of community or for some excitement. Keeping your teen as engaged in other activities as possible can lessen the draw of gangs.^[4]

• Encourage your teen to engage in activities that appeal to his or her interest. Is your teen always sketching or drawing? Enroll him or her in art classes. Is your teen athletic? Encourage him or her to join a school sports team. Is your teen interested in music? Invest in a piano, guitar, or other musical instrument.
• Push your teen to find an after school job. While some teens might resist the notion of working, emphasize how building a work ethic can help later on. Talk about what your teen could do with all the extra spending money.
• Allow your teen to have friends over at your house. You want your teen to feel most comfortable at home, where it's safe. This also gives you an opportunity to get to know your teen and his or her peers. You can encourage wholesome activities, like board games and age appropriate movies, over the kinds of activities that might land your teen in trouble.

Learn how to best communicate with a teen. Communicating with teenager can be difficult. Most teens feel an increased need for autonomy and independence, which means they may pull away and rebel against you. However, learning the means to effectively communicate with a teen can help.^[5]

• Always listen without judgment. If your teen is willing to share something with you, let him or her. Try to stay calm and listen, even if your concerned by what your teen is saying. Remember, as a parent you're better off hearing bad news than not hearing it. Being reactionary and harsh can discourage your teen from reaching out when in need.
• Respect your teen's sense of privacy and autonomy. Unless you suspect a serious problem, allow your teen his or her own space. Let them have a bedroom to themselves. Do not always ask who your teen is calling or texting on the phone. Do not touch your teen's belonging without permission.
• Schedule times to talk. You do not need to schedule a weekly conversation, but having a family dinner night or board game night gives your teen the opportunity to share. Strive to keep communication open and keep yourself available when your teen is in need.

Identify positive role models for your teen. Teens often join gangs because they feel lost. Lacking positive role models, a teen might turn to the allure of a gang. Identify positive roll models for your teen.

• Get your teen involved in the community. Encourage him or her to volunteer. Take him or her to church, town hall meetings, and other places and meetings you attend.
• Teach your teen about people you admire. This can be someone you know personally, like your great-grandmother who supported her family during the Great Depression. It can also be a public figure, like a politician or activist. Showing your teen what you believe admirable qualities constitute can lessen the appeal of gang members.

Remove gang related graffiti. Graffiti is often a way for gangs to advertise and recruit new members. If you notice new or unusual graffiti in your area, google the images to see if they're gang affiliated. If they are, talk to the local police about having them removed as soon as possible. Depending on regulations in your area, you may be able to remove the images yourself or schedule a community cleanup. Stop by the local courthouse and ask what your options are in terms of arranging a cleanup.

Team up with other parents. The phrase "It takes a village to raise a child" exists for a reason. You cannot do this alone. Work with other parents to build a stronger community and to keep out gangs.^[6]

• Schedule a meeting with other parents in town to discuss gang activity in your area. Brainstorm ideas about how to keep your teens out of gangs.
• Working together, you and other parents can create regular community events and activities for teens to engage in in order to discourage them from joining gangs. You can also go, as a group, to a PTA to raise any concerns you have about gang activity in the school system.
• Look into starting a neighborhood watch to keep on the lookout for gang activity.