How to Date a Virgo Woman

Co-authored by Stina Garbis

Last Updated: July 13, 2022 References

Dating a Virgo woman can be really fun and exciting. Virgos are charming, creative, loyal, and strong. You might have also heard that they can be picky when it comes to dating. Don’t worry! By putting in some extra effort and showing her your awesome qualities, you’ll have a better chance of winning her heart.

This article is based on an interview with our psychic astrologer, Stina Garbis, owner of Psychic Stina. Check out the full interview here.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Creating a Strong Impression on a First Date

1
Notice if she has typical Virgo qualities. Before you make assumptions about what this woman wants based on her sign, try to figure out if she has the common traits of a Virgo. You can do this by asking her questions about her interests, her likes and dislikes, and so on. You can also do a little investigating and talk to mutual friends or check her out on social media to get a better sense of her interests and personality.
- Virgos are thought to be hard workers, straightforward, loyal, critical, analytical, practical, and kind.^{[1]
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  Research source} Ask yourself if this woman has these qualities.
- Virgos like honesty, availability, and cleanliness in a partner.
2
Put your best foot forward. A typical Virgo is less likely to be easily charmed or swayed by passion. Anticipate a woman who is far more practical about whom she dates.^{[2]
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Research source} If she is a true Virgo, expect her to apply a critical eye toward you right from the get-go. Don’t be offended by this, since she is considering you as a potential partner. This means she might still think highly of you as a person even if she doesn’t initially believe you to be right for her romantically.
- Make yourself open and available to her, as a shy Virgo won't pursue you if she thinks you're a hard target.
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3
Dress carefully. Notice if appearance seems to be important to this woman. Is her clothing immaculately tailored? Are her friends similarly well-dressed? If so, you may want to put extra effort into dressing yourself. Choose them with precision to make a clear statement about who you are, right from the start. Take her own fashion sense as a cue. Match her level of casual versus elegant wear, within your own tastes, to meet her own personal expectations.^{[3]
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- Bear in mind that Virgos are more often interested in long-term relationships than one-time hookups. Consequently, this may be a long courtship.^{[4]
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  Research source} Be sure to dress to please while staying true to who you are to avoid wasting either of your time.
4
Groom yourself. Further ensure that you make a positive visual impression by taking care of your body’s appearance. Shower beforehand, comb your hair, and apply deodorant. Brush your teeth, floss, and rinse with mouthwash. Cut and clean your nails. Clip any nose or ear hairs that are poking out. Exfoliate and moisturize your skin to get rid of any dry flakes.^{[5]
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5
Be punctual.^{[6]
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Research source} If this woman has a Virgo's judgmental streak, she may have difficulty overcoming first impressions.^{[7]
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Research source} Avoid creating one of unreliability on your very first date. If you are held up for whatever reason, make every effort to contact her and let her know. Replace the negative impression of being late with the positive one of being communicative.
6
Keep her at ease. Expect her to apply the same critical eye to herself.^{[8]
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Research source} Obviously, ask about her life (work, school, friends, family, dreams, etc.) when appropriate to indicate your interest in her. Pay attention, however, to how comfortable she seems in answering. Back off when she becomes awkward, nervous, or edgy about certain topics.
- Because of their self-critical nature, Virgos may often feel uncomfortable when they are the center of attention.
- If she is reluctant to share too much information about herself right away, stick to more general topics, such as world news or movies or music.
- Keep the conversation light and organic to prevent it from resembling a formal interrogation.^{[9]
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7
Keep yourself at ease, too. Resist the urge to appear flawless in her eyes. It can be hard to resist the urge to present yourself as the perfect person, or to try and change yourself to appeal to what you think she wants, but this rarely works out. Be yourself and see if you match up. Although Virgos hope to find a perfect fit romantically, remember that they expect the fit to be perfect, not you personally. Keep in mind that she may be looking for a partner whose strengths make up for her weaknesses, and so she may not be too concerned if your strengths don’t match all of hers.^{[10]
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- Focus on creating a strong honest first impression, rather than an idealized one that would be impossible to live up to. Aim to show her exactly who you are instead of what you think she wants you to be.
8
Talk about a wide array of topics. Remember that Virgos are very pragmatic in their assessment of potential partners. Expect her to not only wonder how well the two of you will get along, but how well you could integrate into her larger life. Unless she seems bored or irritated, don’t be shy of steering the conversation toward interests that she doesn’t share. Even if she personally dislikes, say, punk rock, trust that she will view your passion for it as a plus.^{[12]
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- When you find out what a Virgo is interested in, take note! Use that topic or interest to intrigue her.
9
Be patient. Although Virgos may harbor inner passions, expect them to act reserved around new people. Don’t be discouraged by a lack of immediate sparks.^{[13]
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Research source} For now, simply aim to win a second date with her. Accept that as a victory in and of itself while allowing her plenty of time to grow more comfortable with you.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Dating a Virgo Long-Term

1
Challenge her false impressions. Give your Virgo the benefit of the doubt and assume that she is aware of her tendency to judge people too quickly. Trust that she is open to reconsidering them when proven wrong.^{[14]
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Research source} If you feel like she has misunderstood a statement of yours, reopen the conversation and clarify your meaning. If she has misinterpreted your actions, explain exactly why you acted as you did.
- For example, say she has concluded that you have poor manners because you didn’t hold the door open for her. Joke about how you are unsure of what is still considered chivalrous and what is now thought to be outmoded and belittling in the modern world of dating.
2
Engage her brain. Understand that Virgos tend to be very knowledgeable. Stimulate her mind by always keeping the conversation alive. Embrace discussions on any number of subjects. Challenge her points of view when you disagree.^{[15]
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- Don’t worry about being an expert on each and every topic. Your openness to discuss topics that you never pondered before should impress her just as much as your thorough knowledge on a subject, if not more so.
3
Have a thick skin. Resist the urge to feel offended by her blunt statements. Appreciate that her practical mind often compels her to speak directly, without mincing words. Regard her criticisms, opinions, and advice as simple statements of what she thinks, rather than a personal attack.^{[16]
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- Past instances of offending people have probably clued her into this tendency of hers, so trust that all you have to do is softly point out that you would appreciate a different choice of words in the future.
- Virgos pride themselves on being critics, and also being right.
4
Be sensitive to her feelings. Remember that no one receives the brunt of her critical eye as much as she does. Expect her to over-analyze your relationship and worry over her own faults, whether or not you even consider them to be a problem. Anticipate that her expectations of herself may lead to pronounced mood swings at times, depending on how well she thinks she’s living up to her standards.^{[17]
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- Encourage her to talk openly about her feelings, which she may hide in the beginning.
- Assure her when her worries are baseless or resolvable.
- Couch your own criticisms gently, since she may take them too much to heart.
EXPERT TIP

Jessica Lanyadoo
Astrologer & Psychic Medium
Jessica Lanyadoo is an astrologer with over 20 years of consulting experience. She is the author of Astrology for Real Relationships: Understanding You, Me, and How We All Get Along and is the host of the popular astrology and advice show, Ghost of a Podcast. Lanyadoo co-hosted TLC’s digital astrology show Stargazing and writes weekly and monthly horoscopes that help you heal.

Jessica Lanyadoo
Astrologer & Psychic Medium

Virgos are reflective and consider all sides of a situation. Your Virgo crush thinks about how they feel, what you're saying, and what you're not saying in any situation. Win them over by being consistent and flexible when you're interacting.
5
Share her with her other commitments. Expect your Virgo to strive to be perfect in other areas of her life, too. Accept that she will divide her time between you and other obligations, such as work, friends, and family. Understand that this balancing act may in fact appear quite imbalanced at times.^{[19]
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Research source} When it appears to be against you, trust that her pragmatic mind has made a logical decision about what needs more attention this minute, rather than take it as a personal slight.
6
Judge her by her actions, not words. Appreciate that your Virgo’s passions will rarely erupt into fiery pronouncements of undying devotion. Remember that she is more likely to think in terms of practicality rather than poetry. Expect her to demonstrate her love with small, consistent acts of caring. Rest assured that her gestures, however moderate, indicate a sincere love and desire for stability.^{[20]
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- For example, though you might be feeling neglected after her fifth night of working late in a row, appreciate her effort to, say, fix you breakfast or a cup of coffee before she leaves in the morning.
7
Be ready to plan ahead. Don’t be surprised if your meticulous Virgo likes to map out the next several years in advance. Expect her to have ambitions as well as clear strategies of how to achieve them. Either share your own early on so that you can formulate a plan together for shared success, or be very, very flexible in where you’d like to see yourself in the future.^{[21]
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- Remember that she may not necessarily be looking for a partner with the exact same qualities as her. So don’t be overwhelmed if you are more of a spontaneous type who prefers seizing the moment. This may be a trait that she envies!^{[22]
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Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Getting Physical

1
Tread cautiously at first. No matter what the person's sign, never make assumptions about what she wants based on that alone. Instead of trying to guess what she is comfortable with, have a candid conversation about sexual preferences. If the woman is a reserved Virgo, you may not be getting physical until later in the relationship, but once that is on the table, it is important you have this talk, even if she is shy. Avoid ruining your chances by forcing a physical relationship before she is ready.
- Bear in mind that Virgos are typically more interested in your potential as a long-term partner, rather than a quick fling.^{[23]
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2
Consider making the first move. If you are both open to it, you may want to initiate physical intimacy with a Virgo. Improve your chances by waiting for a private moment, since Virgos may be reluctant to display too much affection in front of others.
3
Plan ahead. Take a page from your Virgo and be meticulous in your planning. Make an event of it with plenty of build-up, such as: a fine bottle of wine; a bouquet of flowers or rose petals on the bed or couch; dimmed lights and lighted candles.^{[24]
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Research source} Take some of the uncertainty out of the equation by announcing your intentions without backing her into a corner. At the same time, demonstrate your confidence to her by setting the stage for your hoped-for outcome.
- If she chooses not to be physical, respect that and back off. Don't try to talk her into it or convince her otherwise.
4
Be supportive. Remember that Virgos criticize themselves more than anyone. If she does something that turns you off, resist the urge to chastise her for it, which might cause her to lose confidence and retreat. Instead of telling her to not do something, encourage her to do something else. Continue to show your enthusiasm in order to assure her that you’re into it. Be patient and trust her inherent desire to perfect her skills in all areas of life.^{[25]
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5
Vocalize your desires. To take things to the next level or spice things up, tell her what you’re thinking. Don’t mistake her hesitancy for a lack of desire or adventure. Instead, appreciate that it takes Virgos some time to grow completely comfortable with a partner. Share your fantasies to probe her own. Chances are that if she shares them, she will be more than willing to raise your game!^{[26]
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Expert Q&A

Question

How can you make a Virgo chase you?

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer
Reverend Stina Garbis is a Psychic Astrologer and the Owner of Psychic Stina. With over 30 years of experience, she specializes in providing personal and professional advice through astrology and tarot card readings. Reverend Stina has experience working with high-profile celebrities, sports figures, politicians, and CEOs. She has been featured in many publications, including Bustle, Vice, The New York Post, and Readers’ Digest and she also has a 200k+ following on TikTok. Stina holds an Ordained Minister License from The International Metaphysical Ministry University Seminary.

Stina Garbis

Psychic Astrologer

Expert Answer

Virgos don't typically chase someone they're interested in. If you intrigue a Virgo and make it clear that you're interested in them, they may pursue you and open up.
Question

What can you do to make a Virgo regret losing you?

Stina Garbis
Psychic Astrologer
Reverend Stina Garbis is a Psychic Astrologer and the Owner of Psychic Stina. With over 30 years of experience, she specializes in providing personal and professional advice through astrology and tarot card readings. Reverend Stina has experience working with high-profile celebrities, sports figures, politicians, and CEOs. She has been featured in many publications, including Bustle, Vice, The New York Post, and Readers’ Digest and she also has a 200k+ following on TikTok. Stina holds an Ordained Minister License from The International Metaphysical Ministry University Seminary.

Stina Garbis

Psychic Astrologer

Expert Answer

It depends on how easily the Virgo is willing to forgive and how easily you are willing to put up with the Virgo's standards. They like to be right, but they just want to tell you, and for you to change, not actually leave. However, if you go back, are you willing to change, or do you want to go into back-and-forth battles with how you choose to live your life?