How to Attract a Scorpio Man As an Aries Woman

Co-authored by Angel Eyedealism and Jennifer Mueller, JD

Last Updated: May 31, 2022 References

If you're a typical Aries woman, you love the thrill of the chase and the hunt for the perfect partner. Perhaps it's not surprising you've got your sights set on a Scorpio, the guy some call the "bad boy" of the zodiac, the one that seems so hard to tame.^{[1]
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Research source} You may say you never back down from a challenge, but Scorpio would likely say the same thing. Here, we've gathered some tips you can use to snag—and hold—that scorpion's attention.

1

Embrace the quirks that make you unique.

Scorpio guys are usually attracted to people who are different. The cookie-cutter type won't turn a scorpion's head. He wants someone who has her own thing going on and is confident enough to own it. This doesn't mean faking it—he can smell that a mile away. Instead, give him a glimpse of who you really are through little things that make you so uniquely "you."^{[2]
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- For example, maybe you have a conservative career and dress the part, but you have an eye-catching keychain that hints at your passion for the occult. Scorpios are known to be interested in the occult as well, so that's something he'll definitely notice.^{[3]
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- A small accessory with a story behind it is also great. If he asks you about it, you have a ready-made conversation starter.

2

Give him hints that your personality has depth.

Try writing in a journal or reading a book around him. The typical Scorpio is a bit of an onion himself—layers and layers—and he appreciates the same in another person. You'll catch his interest if it seems like you've got more going on under the surface than would appear at first glance.^{[4]
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- Just a little something unexpected or out of the ordinary will stoke his curiosity. He'll be attracted because he'll feel like he just has to learn more about you, to find out all the different layers of your psyche.
- But speaking of layers, you want to peel those back slowly. Don't tell him your whole life story on the first date—he's not likely to stick around if there's no mystery left.^{[5]
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3

Create opportunities for him to approach you alone.

The scorpion usually stays away if you're surrounded by friends.^{[6]
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Research source} This might be hard for you if you're the typical extroverted Aries who's always out with a bunch of people.^{[7]
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Research source} But if you want to attract that Scorpio guy, make an effort to go out alone when you know you're likely to cross paths.
- For example, if you always see him when you go to the local café with your friends, go by yourself at around the same time. If he's there, you'll have a greater chance of catching his eye.
- Scorpio also tends to be attracted to confidence, and a woman out alone exudes confidence.

4

Skip the small talk and start a substantive discussion.

Most Scorpio men bore of small talk quickly. Unless you're majoring in meteorology or are really passionate about climate change, talking about the weather isn't usually a great opener with a Scorpio. Instead, ask him a question about his hopes and dreams or something he's really passionate about and watch him open up and engage.^{[8]
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- Remember that both Aries and Scorpio are ruled by Mars, the planet of passion. Stick to topics that ignite interest (yours or his)—even if you're into something he's not familiar with, he'll find your passion for the subject fascinating. Aries is a fire sign, so let him see some of that spark!

5

Listen actively when he talks about how he feels.

Emotions can be extremely important to the sensitive scorpion. This might be a bit hard for you, Aries, since you typically want to talk about actions and results. The Scorpio guy often wants to talk about how he feels, and sometimes he just wants to vent—he's looking for empathy, not a solution.^{[9]
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- You might get in the habit of asking him, "Are you looking for solutions or do you just want me to listen?" That helps you understand what he wants from you so he won't get upset at your reaction.

6

Cool down before you confront him about something upsetting.

Your quick, Aries temper can overwhelm an emotional Scorpio. You're a fire sign, and you're known for a hot temper that can evaporate the still waters of your scorpion if you're not careful. Step away and take a few deep breaths to calm and ground yourself before you bring up problems.^{[10]
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- If you do blow up on your scorpion, take ownership of your actions and your words and apologize as soon as possible. He'll forgive you—in time—if you show how much he means to you.

7

Share something you're passionate about with him.

Scorpio, like Aries, is also ruled by Mars, the planet of passion. Your scorpion typically loves seeing you get really excited and enthralled by something. You don't have to worry about holding back with him—seeing you get really into something will make you attractive to him.^{[11]
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- As an Aries, you're known to be eager and enthusiastic, so it shouldn't be hard for you to find something you love that you can share.^{[12]
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  Research source} It's even better if it's something he's not that familiar with, so you can teach him all about it.
- Be careful if you have a tendency to jump from one thing to another. Scorpios tend to get obsessive about their interests, so if he sees you bouncing around from one thing to the next, he might think you're flaky or superficial—two traits he's not a fan of.

8

Stick to a single signature scent if you wear perfume.

Scorpios have the reputation for having a strong sense of smell. A floral, spicy, or fruity signature scent will capture his attention and he'll notice it every time you're together.^{[13]
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Research source} Over time, he'll come to associate it with you and it will fuel his attraction to you.
- Essential oils work great for signature scents because they're often scents he'll come across throughout the course of his day. Every time he smells it, he'll be reminded of you.

9

Go on an outdoor adventure together.

Both Aries and Scorpio are known as adventurous signs. The typical Aries is pretty active, so a hiking or camping adventure might be right up your alley.^{[14]
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Research source} If you're not that into roughing it, you'll still have a lot of fun on a road trip going somewhere off the beaten path that the two of you can discover on your own.^{[15]
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- For example, you might book a cabin in the woods next to a pristine lake. You can go boating or fishing during the day and cuddle up by the fire at night.

10

Challenge him to a game of strategy.

A Scorpio man typically enjoys opportunities to think strategically.^{[16]
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Research source} If you're a typical Aries woman, you have a competitive streak a mile wide—indulge it in a game of strategy, such as chess or checkers, that puts the two of you head-to-head.^{[17]
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Research source} As the two of you become engaged in the game, the sparks are sure to fly.
- There are plenty of other games that require strategic thinking if chess isn't your bag. Some classic 2-player games include Stratego, Scrabble, and Go. If you've got a couple of other players, you might try Risk or Catan.

11

Suggest a hard-hitting documentary to watch together.

A Scorpio man is typically attracted to deep and difficult subjects. Scorpio guys tend to enjoy deep-dives into psychological subjects—they love analyzing things and figuring out what makes people tick. If you find something kind of out there, dealing with the paranormal or the occult, he'll probably really eat it up.^{[18]
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- Plan on plenty of discussion afterward—your scorpion is sure to have lots of thoughts about what you just watched. If you're watching something at home, be prepared for frequent pauses so he can digest what just happened on screen.

12

Spend a night out indulging at a new fancy restaurant.

Scorpios are known to love indulging in quality food and drinks.^{[19]
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Research source} Going to a new restaurant can help satisfy your craving for something different, something exotic.^{[20]
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Research source} And it gives him the opportunity to pamper his tastebuds, which he's always going to be down for. Win-win!
- If, like a typical Aries, you're one for the grand romantic gesture, you might call the restaurant ahead of time and set up a special table and tasting menu for the two of you to savor.

13

Get adventurous in the bedroom.

Scorpio men are known for their passion and sexual magnetism. One place scorpions typically aren't shy is in bed, get ready for some sparks. And don't be surprised if he breaks out the handcuffs!^{[21]
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- Since both of your signs are ruled by Mars, it's likely the two of you will fight for dominance and really push each other's sexual limits—but your chemistry is raw, passionate, and primal.^{[22]
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14

Give your Scorpio guy enough quiet time to regroup.

If you're a typical extroverted Aries, you might not understand his need for alone time. Scorpio guys tend to be more introverted and emotional. If your guy's this way, take it seriously when he says he needs some time alone. It's not you, it's him! Without enough alone time to recharge his batteries, he'll get cranky and shut down.^{[23]
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- As an extrovert, this might be difficult for you to understand. Just think of it as the opposite of the antsy-ness you feel if you're sitting at home alone with nowhere to go.

15

Open up to him and let him get to know your true self.

A Scorpio guy won't stick around if he feels like you're putting on a front. Above all, your scorpion needs you to be open and honest with him. If you're just saying whatever you think he wants to hear or trying to change yourself into his ideal woman so he'll fall for you, he'll figure it out eventually—and he won't like it.^{[24]
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- The best thing you can do is open yourself up to him and let him get to know you as a person—warts and all! Don't pretend to be someone you're not. He'll have more appreciation for you if he can see that you're not putting on an act with him.

16

Give him time to open up.

The elusive scorpion tends to keep himself mysterious. Getting to know a Scorpio man sometimes requires a little bit of patience, so don't expect him to tell you everything about him on the first date. This sensitive guy prefers to keep his vulnerabilities hidden until he's sure that he can trust you.^{[25]
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Research source} Show him that you are trustworthy and solid, and eventually he will relax.
- When he does reveal something deeper about himself, show that you understand and appreciate the trust that he's placed in you. You might say, "thank you so much for sharing that with me, it means a lot to know you trust me enough to talk about something so personal."

17

Avoid getting involved with other men.

If he's a typical Scorpio, he'll lose interest if he feels he has to compete. A typical Scorpio gets jealous easily and isn't one to get involved with someone who's got eyes for anyone but him, so clear your dance card before you make a move.^{[26]
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Research source} And, although this can be difficult for a typical Aries, try to keep your flirting with others to a minimum—especially when you're out with him.^{[27]
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- This is an area where a Scorpio and an Aries can have problems, so you might find that you have to really watch yourself. Something that you see as harmless, meaningless flirting can really stoke a Scorpio's jealousy.