How to Apologize for a Drunk Text

Co-authored by Brett Baughman

Last Updated: December 15, 2022

If you woke up to discover that "drunk you" texted the absolute worst person possible (maybe your ex), you're not alone. It can be super embarrassing to wake up to a bunch of texts that you absolutely don't remember sending, but try not to beat yourself up over it. What feels cringe-worthy now may become a funny story down the line, but right now, you're probably looking for the perfect text to undo what happened. This article has everything you need to know about recovering from a drunk text and apologizing.

1

"I'm so sorry. I had too much to drink last night!"

Own what happened and simply apologize. If you sent a harmless late-night text (maybe one with a winky face or some misspellings), your best bet is to just tell the truth. First, sober up with some water and breakfast. Then, go ahead and let the person know that you had a few too many drinks the night before and are sorry for texting them. Many, many people have sent a drunk text in their lifetime, so the person you texted will probably understand.^{[1]
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- "I had a few too many last night. I'm really sorry 😬"
- Sobering up before you send your apology text can help you approach the situation with a clear head.

2

"I clearly can't handle my tequila. Sorry about that!"

Make light of what happened if your text was pretty innocent. If all you sent was some ill-advised emojis (and no drunken tirades), then the recipient might've thought it was a little funny. Send a joke to acknowledge the humor in the situation along with an apology. The person you texted will likely understand and respect that you're able to laugh at yourself.
- "Someone had too many Manhattans last night! I'm sorry if I woke you up..."

3

"Well, I'm embarrassed...sorry about my texts last night."

Admitting that you're embarrassed might diffuse the situation. You sent a drunk text and you're feeling a little vulnerable; it happens! First, re-read the text to see if it's really that bad. Even if it wasn't your proudest moment, it's likely that this person will let it go if you apologize and own up to your feelings. Text the person that you're feeling a little embarrassed and that you're sorry. They'll likely respect your honesty.^{[2]
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- "Oh no, I'm so embarrassed. Sorry about this!"

4

"OMG my friend stole my phone last night. So sorry about that text!"

Sometimes, a white lie might be necessary. If you perhaps texted someone you just started seeing and need to do damage control, you might consider fibbing a little to save face. Sure, it's not usually a good idea to lie, but it might be your best bet if you don't know this person well (and want to keep getting to know them).
- "Oh no, I forgot my phone in an Uber last night and this happened. Sorry about that!"
- Keep in mind that this person may be able to tell that you're lying.

5

"I should not have sent this. I'm sorry."

Let the person know the text was a mistake (especially if it was an ex). Sometimes, drinking can make you feel weepier, lonelier, and more nostalgic than sober you. You might wake up to realize that you're actually happy without your ex, but have to fix the situation now that you're sober. If you don't want them to get the wrong impression, let them know that the text was a mistake and that you're sorry.
- "I was drinking last night and I sent this text by mistake. My apologies!"

6

"I'm sorry about drunk texting you last night. I've been meaning to reach out, but not like that!"

It's possible that you actually still want to talk to this person. Perhaps you texted your middle school BFF or an ex you've been meaning to reconnect with. If that's the case, apologize but let them know that you've been thinking of them. Try to only contact them when you're sober going forward, and be realistic about your expectations if you were hoping this text would rekindle an old romance or friendship.
- "I'm so sorry about last night. How have you been?"

7

"I'm really sorry. I can delete your number so that doesn't happen again."

Let your ex know that it won't happen again if you're not talking right now. If you recently broke up with your ex or are in the middle of a no-contact period, try letting them know that you won't contact them in the future. This can help the two of you move on and avoid giving your ex false hope if they liked hearing from you.^{[3]
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- "I'm sorry, I had a lot to drink last night. I promise this won't happen in the future."

8

"I am so sorry for what I said last night. I was drunk, but that's no excuse."

It's possible drunk you said some unkind things last night. If you said some things you don't stand by now that you're sober, text that person a genuine apology. Let them know that you were drunk (but avoid using that as an excuse) and own up to your behavior. This person may be hurt, but they'll have a bigger chance of forgiving you if you take responsibility for what happened.^{[4]
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- "I'm really sorry about what I texted you. I had a few drinks, and I absolutely didn't mean it."

9

"Wow, I am so sorry about this. Can we meet in person sometime today? I'd like to make it up to you."

Sometimes, an in-person apology might be necessary. You might have sent a really hurtful message or something that requires a little more explanation. If that's the case, apologize and ask the person if they would be available to meet in person. Making the effort to apologize face-to-face might help the situation and let this person know that you're genuine.^{[5]
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- "I can't believe I sent this to you. I'm so sorry. Would you be free to meet sometime today so we can talk about it?"
- You might also try calling them to apologize.

10

Send nothing and pretend it never happened.

If this person isn't in your life anymore, consider simply moving on. Perhaps you texted a friend you're no longer speaking to or an ex you're on super bad terms with. In that case, you might try your best to forget about it and move forward. Sending a follow-up text might make the situation worse, even. Make a promise to yourself to avoid drunk texting again, delete this person's number, and consider blocking them if you're concerned about their reply.

11

Forgive yourself and move on.

Treat this as a lesson. Many people before you have sent a drunk text. It can be really embarrassing in the moment, but try not to be too hard on yourself. Take the steps you need to feel better (own up to it, apologize, delete their number, etc.) and then move forward. Sending multiple apology texts in a row or replaying what you said over and over again will only make the situation worse.^{[6]
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- Call up a friend for some advice and reassurance. They can help you remember that everyone makes mistakes, and you might even laugh about this down the line.

Expert Q&A

Question

How do you stop yourself from drunk texting?

Brett Baughman
Life Coach
Brett Baughman is a Business & Life Coach, as well as the Founder of The Brett Baughman Companies, Inc., and the renowned Action Mastery retreats. With over 20 years of experience, his specialty is helping high-performing executives and entrepreneurs to advance to the next level of success. He earned his Bachelor’s Degree from Illinois State University and was mentored by Tad James. During his work at the Tad James Company, he earned his certifications as a Master NLP Coach (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), a Certified Master Hypnotherapist, an NLP Trainer & Master Practitioner, and a Time Line Therapy Trainer & Master Practitioner. He’s also been voted the Top Coach to work with by Apple News.

Brett Baughman

Life Coach

Expert Answer

Remove any numbers that you're prone to drunk text from your contacts list. Put them in an email or store them in a note on your phone—that way, you still have their contact info, but they're less accessible.
Question

Should you apologize after drunk texting?

Brett Baughman
Life Coach
Brett Baughman is a Business & Life Coach, as well as the Founder of The Brett Baughman Companies, Inc., and the renowned Action Mastery retreats. With over 20 years of experience, his specialty is helping high-performing executives and entrepreneurs to advance to the next level of success. He earned his Bachelor’s Degree from Illinois State University and was mentored by Tad James. During his work at the Tad James Company, he earned his certifications as a Master NLP Coach (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), a Certified Master Hypnotherapist, an NLP Trainer & Master Practitioner, and a Time Line Therapy Trainer & Master Practitioner. He’s also been voted the Top Coach to work with by Apple News.

Brett Baughman

Life Coach

Expert Answer

Absolutely! The worst thing we can do is lie, hide, or stress out about the outcome. If your relationship with that person is supposed to happen, it will happen and the person will understand and forgive you. If not, you'll know very quickly that it's time to move on.