How to Get a Guy to Notice You

Co-authored by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW and Danielle Blinka, MA, MPA

Last Updated: August 28, 2022 References

When you like a guy, it hurts to feel like he doesn't notice you. Fortunately, you can get on his radar by catching his attention. Draw his eye with a great outfit, eye contact, and a smile. Additionally, have a casual conversation to really get his attention and show off your personality so he’s more drawn to you. It’s also helpful to connect with him over social media so he sees how awesome you are.

Method 1

Method 1 of 4:

Catching His Eye

1
Wear an outfit that makes you feel fabulous. When you wear something that makes you feel great, it boosts your confidence and makes you look more attractive. Choose something that enhances your best features and flatters your shape. This will draw his attention.^{[1]
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- For instance, you might wear jeans and a form-fitting t-shirt or button-up, a cotton t-shirt and a skirt, or a cute dress.
- Don’t worry about being trendy. He’s going to pay more attention to your confidence, not your outfit.
Tip: Add a pop of red to your outfit to draw all eyes to you! For instance, wear a red shirt, dress, scarf, tie, shoes, or hat.
2
Apply red lipstick if you normally wear makeup. You don't need to wear makeup to get a guy, but red lipstick is a great option if makeup is already a part of your look. Red lipstick is considered a sexy color, so it will make guys think you’re more attractive. Use a classic red for an easy option. Alternatively, match your red to your skin tone. Wear a red with bluish undertones if you have a cool skin tone or a red with orange undertones if you have a warm skin tone.^{[2]
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- Don’t worry about wearing red lipstick if you hate makeup. You shouldn’t put up a false self: you want him to be attracted to who you are.
- If you're still in school, make sure you're allowed to wear makeup before you do it.
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3
Wear a signature scent to make him remember you. Scent can both draw his attention and make him remember you. Choose a scent that you like and that smells great on you. Then, wear it whenever you’re around him.^{[3]
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- For instance, you might wear perfume, scented lotion, scented shampoo, or diluted essential oils.
4
Make eye contact and smile at him for 2-3 seconds. Eye contact shows him that you noticed him. If you also smile, he’ll know you might be interested. Plus, smiling makes your face look more attractive. Whenever you’re around him, look him in the eye and smile.^{[4]
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- Don’t stare at him longer than 3 seconds because he’ll get uncomfortable.
5
Use open body language to draw his attention. Face your body toward him and keep your arms down at your sides. This shows him you’re approachable and comfortable with him. Avoid positions that close you off, like crossing your arms over your chest or crossing your legs.^{[5]
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- Try not to turn away from him because this closes you off from him.
6
Wink at him when you pass him. Winking at a guy is an easy way to flirt without having to say anything. Whenever you pass by him, look at him, smile, and wink. Keep walking so that he’s left thinking about what the wink might mean. Alternatively, wink at him during a conversation to be a little flirty.^{[6]
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- If for some reason he’s not interested, you can just act like the wink was an accident. Say, “Oh, I’m sorry! There must be something in my eye. I’ll go find a mirror to check.”
7
Brush against him or casually touch his arm to break the touch barrier. Touching a guy is also a great way to flirt without saying anything. It guarantees that he’ll notice you and may make him start thinking about touching you. If you’re nervous, simply brush against him while you’re passing him. If you’re more bold, lightly touch his arm while you’re talking to him.^{[7]
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- When you brush against him, say something like, “Oh, I’m sorry,” or “These halls are too narrow.”
- You might touch his arm and ask him a question like, “Do you know when our essay is due?” or “Can you tell me where the nearest coffee shop is?”

Method 2

Method 2 of 4:

Talking to Him

1
Ask him questions so you can get to know him. People love talking about themselves, so he’ll get a big confidence boost if you show an interest in what he has to say. Get him talking by asking him questions. Then, listen to his response. Nod along as he talks and paraphrase what he said back to him.^{[8]
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- You might ask, “What are your plans for the summer?” “What did you do last weekend?” or “What kind of music does your favorite band play?”
- If you're still in school, ask questions about your assignments, like "Which topic did you choose for the research project?" or "Are you going to the school play auditions this year?"
2
Share your knowledge and opinions to show him you’re smart. Guys will be attracted to your intelligence, so don’t be afraid to speak your mind. Open up to him by telling him your ideas and opinions. Just keep things positive by not engaging in an argument.^{[9]
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- Talk about the books you've read and current events.
- If you're in school, you might comment about the topics you're studying. You could say, "I think it's interesting that the book we're studying in English class relates to what we're studying in history class."
- It’s okay to disagree about things. Make peace by acknowledging the difference and changing the subject. If he has a different opinion than you, say, “It’s always interesting to hear someone else's take on things. Did you watch the game on Friday?”
3
Give him a sincere compliment to make him feel good. Look for reasons to compliment him whenever you’re around him. Compliments shouldn’t always be focused on his looks. Tell him what you like about his achievements and his personality as well. This will show him that you notice him, which will draw his attention.^{[10]
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- You might say, “Your hair looks really cool today,” or “Awesome presentation this morning.”
4
Ask him for help with something so he feels needed. Everyone likes feeling needed, so asking for help is a great way to connect with someone. Plus, it gives you a reason to talk to him. Choose a small favor or task that you know he can help with. Then, ask if he’ll give you a hand.^{[11]
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- Say, “Can you help me set up for the meeting today?” “Will you show me how to put this together,” or “Will you help me collect donations for the local animal shelter?"
- If you're still in school, ask him for help with an assignment or afterschool activity. Say, "Can you show me how to throw a curveball?" "Will you help me get ready for the debate tournament on Saturday?" or "Will you proofread my essay if I proofread yours?"

Method 3

Method 3 of 4:

Showing off Your Personality

1
Act confident so you seem like a good catch. Confidence makes you look attractive and interesting. To show you’re confident, stand up tall, look people in the eye, and smile a lot. Additionally, focus on your talents and accomplishments so you feel good about yourself, which will show.^{[12]
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- If you’re low in confidence, work on building your confidence by listing your strengths, accomplishing a goal, and using positive self talk.
2
Share your passions with others so you appear interesting. Being passionate about something makes you seem like an exciting, interesting person. Talk about your passions when the guy you like is around. If you can, wear items like t-shirts, buttons, hats, or totes that reflect your passions. Additionally, post about your passions online.^{[13]
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- For example, you might say something like, “My art lets me express what I’m really feeling inside and connect with others."
- If you're at work, talk about your professional goals. Say, "I want to stay at this company for awhile, so I'm working toward a promotion." If you're at school, talk about your extracurricular activities. Say, "I'm starting a new club to help animals because I'm passionate about animal rights."
- Similarly, you might wear a t-shirt that features your favorite band or carry a tote bag with a print related to your hobby.
3
Engage in hobbies and activities so you’re a well-rounded person. Being involved in something makes you seem like a better catch. Do the things that make you happy, and post about them online. When you’re around the guy you like, make it clear that you’re super busy with all of the fun things you do.^{[14]
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- Being busy can actually make him more interested in you because it makes it clear that you aren't solely focused on finding a relationship.
- Say something like, “I’m so excited that we have a half day on Friday because I need a few hours to rest. This weekend is packed with my art class, a show, and Cheyenne’s party.”
4
Try something new so you seem adventurous. Think of things you’ve always wanted to try or maybe feel afraid to try. Then, check off 1 new thing every month. This will show him that you’re exciting and adventurous, which will draw his interest.^{[15]
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- For example, go bungee jumping, try a new restaurant, join a club, start a new hobby, or take a class.

Method 4

Method 4 of 4:

Using Social Media

1
Friend or follow his social media accounts to connect with him. If you’re not already connected on social media, make the first move and send him a friend request or hit “follow.” Most likely, he’ll follow you back automatically. This will ensure that he sees your posts. Plus, it makes it easier for him to contact you by commenting on your post or sending you a direct message.^{[16]
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- Don’t follow all of his accounts at once. Start with the platform you use most, then space out the others over a few days. This makes it look like you’re just discovering his other pages.
2
Post about your interests and activities on social media. Include the highlights of your day so that he can see what an awesome catch you are. Post a mix of photos, updates, and events that you’re attending. This will show him that you’re involved in a lot of fun stuff, which may make him interested.^{[17]
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- For instance, post a pic with your friends, use a photo of you playing a sport, include a photo of your cat, or post a progress photo of a painting you’re working on.
Warning: It's important to be careful when you're posting online. Don't post your location, personal information, or contact information on social media. Similarly, avoid sharing information that someone could use to find you or that you don't want made public.
3
Include photos of you enjoying life but limit your selfies. Selfies can make you feel great about yourself, so don’t feel bad about taking them. However, posting too many selfies can make you seem narcissistic or bored. Instead, make sure most of your photos are showing you doing something. This will draw his eye to you instead of making him keep scrolling.^{[18]
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- If you’re really feeling your look, try taking a selfie from further away so people see what’s going on around you. This tells people you’re doing something fun while also showing off your look.
4
Limit how often you post negative things on social media. It’s okay to sometimes post about negative events in your life when you need support or advice. However, posting long rants and frequent complaints is a turn off for a lot of people. You want your guy to see you as mostly positive and someone who enjoys life.^{[19]
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- For instance, it’s okay to post something like, “I had a hard day today, but I’m grateful for my friends,” or “Really needing support right now because I lost my dog today.” However, avoid rants about people you hate or polarizing issues, as well as comments like, “Everything always goes wrong,” or “People really suck.”