How to Get a Boy to Like You (Teens)

Co-authored by Imad Jbara and Amy Bobinger

Last Updated: January 21, 2022 References

When you have a crush on a boy, it can be hard to think about anything else. Maybe you're picturing his eyes, his smile, or his style instead of doing your math homework, for instance. You might even find yourself spending a lot of time planning how to get him to like you. While you can't really make anyone else like you, there are things you can do to boost your chances, like spending time around him, looking more confident, and sending him flirty signals.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Getting to Know Each Other

1
Say hi when you see him. Sometimes you have to give someone a little attention to get them to notice you. It can be hard, but when you see your crush, take a deep breath to gather your nerves, then make eye contact, smile, and say hi. You can even throw in a little wave, if you'd like!^{[1]
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- If you see the boy you like several times a day, just say hi the first time you see him. You can still make eye contact and smile when you bump into him later, though!
2
Strike up a conversation when the two of you are near each other. If you're just passing him in the hall, a simple "Hi" might be enough. However, if you're sitting next to each other at a pep rally or standing by each other in the lunch line, it might be awkward if you don't say anything else after that. Try talking about whatever's going on around you for an easy way to make small talk.^{[2]
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- For instance, if you run into each other while you're at a concert, you might say, "Have you heard this band before? I came with my friend, but she says they're really good."
- If you sit next to each other in class, you could chat before the bell rings. For example, you might say, "Hey did you study for the quiz today?"
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3
Ask open-ended questions about his interests. If you ask a question that can be answered with "Yes" or "No," chances are that's the only response you're going to get. Try to get creative by asking him questions that will require him to elaborate on his answer a little.^{[3]
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- For instance, if you're talking about school, instead of saying, "Do you like English class?" you might say, "Who's your favorite teacher?"
- If he mentions watching TV, instead of saying "Do you watch The Voice?" you could say, "What kind of stuff do you like to watch?"
- If he gives you a short answer anyway, try saying something like, "Oh yeah? Why?"
Tip: Really pay attention to the answers, too—if he mentions he has a math test later that day, the next time you see him you can ask him out it went. That might show him that you're interested in what he has to say.
4
Find something you have in common, then chat about it when you see him. When you're chatting with the boy you have a crush on, ask him about the things he likes. If he mentions any things you like too, make a note of them. Then, try to mention them when you are around him.^{[4]
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Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.}
- If you discover that you both love This Is Us, for instance, you'll have something to talk about every time a new episode airs!
- It's okay to talk about things you don't have in common, too! For instance, if he loves hockey but you don't know anything about it, you can still ask, "Hey, did your team win their game last night?"
5
Get his number, then text him casually. Texting can be a great way to get to know someone, because they have time to think about what they want to say. However, when you're just starting to get to know a guy, it's best to keep your texts brief and positive.^{[5]
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- For instance, you might text him something like, "Hey! I can't read what I wrote in my science notes from today's class! Can you snap me a pic of your notes?"
- Just keep in mind that it doesn't necessarily mean that a guy likes you just because he's texting you. Try to just act natural, as if you're texting your best friend.
6
Try to find ways to spend time around each other. The best way to get to know a guy is to spend time around each other, so when you get the chance to hang out, take it! For instance, you might invite him to sit with you and your friends at an assembly, or you might ask him to be your lab partner if you have science class together.^{[6]
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- Make sure to balance this with giving him plenty of space, though. It's probably not a good idea to follow him everywhere he goes—just look for organic opportunities to spend time around each other when you can.
7
Allow your relationship to deepen over time. It can be a little awkward if someone you hardly know tells you everything about their personal life, so hold your secrets close to your chest at first. As you and your crush get to know each other better, he'll see it as a sign of trust when you open up to him.^{[7]
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- For instance, when you're first getting to know each other, you might casually mention that you love 80s New Wave music. After you get closer, you could tell him that the reason is because your favorite aunt always plays it when you go over to her house, and it reminds you of her.
- As you're getting to know each other better, take the time to make sure your values match up. For instance, if you feel kindness is an important quality in another person, pay attention to the way the guy treats others to make sure you're comfortable with it.
8
Don't change to be more like what you think he wants. Sometimes, it's easy to feel like you need to make changes to yourself so a guy will you. However, it's really important to be yourself so you can find the person who's going to like you for your unique personality. You're perfect for someone, even if it's not the person you have a crush on right this second.^{[8]
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- For instance, if you like hanging out indoors but your crush wants someone who's super outdoorsy, don't pretend like you love camping. If you do end up going camping together, he'll probably be able to tell you're not into it, and he'll feel betrayed that you lied.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Showing Him Your Best Side

1
Try to look your best each day. Your daily routine doesn't have to be elaborate—sometimes just a little attention to your appearance can make a big difference. Each morning, wash your face, shower, and brush your teeth. Put on clean, wrinkle-free clothes that fit you comfortably, and take a few moments to style your hair.^{[9]
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- If you wear makeup, try to keep it light and natural—focus on enhancing the features you like the most. For instance, you use concealer to cover any blemishes, then add a little mascara and gloss to enhance your eyes and lips.
- Most guys are very visual, so putting effort into your grooming and appearance can make you seem more attractive to him.
- Guys do tend to respond first to someone's appearance, although over time, your character and personality will have a bigger part in whether they want to date you.
2
Stand up straight and make eye contact to project confidence. If you seem more confident, you'll instantly appear more attractive.^{[10]
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Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.} Whenever you think about it, straighten your back, push your shoulders back, and lift your chin slightly. Making eye contact with other people, rather than looking at your feet, will make you seem more confident, too.^{[11]
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- If you start to feel nervous or insecure, try taking several long, deep breaths to help yourself calm down and feel confident again.
- Also, when you speak, try to keep your tone calm and relaxed to seem more self-assured.
3
Give your guy your whole attention when he's around. Your crush isn't going to have a chance to fall for your personality if you're constantly looking at your phone. When the two of you have a chance to spend time together, make it a priority to focus on him. That will make him feel more appreciated.^{[12]
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- In addition to showing your crush that you value his time, you'll also have a better chance of getting to know the real him, since you'll notice small details you won't see if you're busy texting your bestie the whole time he's talking
4
Don't tease your crush or try to make him jealous. Sometimes when you like a guy, you might feel tempted to tease him or put him in his place. Teasing your crush might seem like a way to throw off his suspicion that you like him or to break any tension between you. However, if you hurt his feelings, spend all your time talking about other guys, or make him feel bad about himself, he probably won't want to spend time around you.^{[13]
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- For instance, if he says, "I like your bow," but you're wearing a headband, don't roll your eyes and say "It's a headband! Boys are so dumb!" Instead, smile and say something like, "Oh, my headband? Thanks, this is my favorite color!"
- Similarly, it's not okay for a guy to tease you to the point of hurting your feelings. A little light joking is okay, but if you feel like he crosses a line into being unkind, it's a good idea to spend your time around other people, instead.
5
Try to be positive and kind. Even if they have a tough exterior, you might be surprised to learn that many guys appreciate positivity and kindness in others, especially someone they're thinking about dating. If you constantly complain, gossip about others, or put other people down, your crush is probably going to think less of you. Instead, try to talk about other people in a way that builds them up, and try to find the bright side in any situation rather than only seeing the bad.^{[14]
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- For instance, instead of saying, "Gabby did SO BAD on her presentation in Debate Club today," you might say, "I felt bad for Gabby. You could tell she worked hard on her presentation but it just didn't go well."
- As another example, if you find yourself waiting for the bus, instead of complaining, "The bus is always late—it's so annoying!" you might say, "That's cool, it gives us a few more minutes to talk."
- This will also help you seem less dramatic. Since a lot of guys really hate drama, this can make you seem more attractive.
6
Work hard on your own projects or hobbies. Even though you might feel like your whole world revolves around your crush, it's important to keep your own interests in mind. By staying focused on your schoolwork, extracurricular activities, or hobbies, you'll feel more self-assured and independent, and that's going to be obvious to your crush, as well.^{[15]
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- For instance, if you have violin lessons every Wednesday, but your crush invites you to hang out, say something like, "Oh I'd love to but I have a lesson that day. Can we hang out Thursday, instead?"

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Hinting How You Feel

1
Make eye contact, smile, then look away for an easy way to flirt. When you're ready to start sending flirty signals to your crush, try catching their eye the next time they're around. Once they're looking into your eyes, hold their gaze for about 3-5 seconds. Then, smile at them before you look away.^{[16]
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- This can be just intriguing enough to catch your crush's attention and make him wonder what you're thinking.
2
Mimic his behavior subtly when he's around. When you like someone, you'll often subconsciously copy the way they're standing or the gestures they make. However, if you're aware of what you're doing, you can do this intentionally to send a subtle message to your crush that you're into him.^{[17]
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- For instance, if he leans forward with his elbows on the table, or if he brushes his hair back, you might do the same.
- Don't go overboard with this—if you're obvious enough that he notices, it will probably seem weird to him.
Tip: Pay attention to whether he mirrors your actions, too—it could be a sign he likes you!
3
Use touch to flirt with him more obviously. If he seems receptive to some of your more subtle flirting, you might try amping it up a little. If you feel comfortable doing so, touch his arm when he says something funny, for instance. You could also lay your hand on his if he's talking about having a bad day. Then, pay attention to his reaction to make sure he's okay with it.^{[18]
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- If he pulls away or frowns, it could mean he isn't into you, or he wants to stay just friends. Give him a little space and see how he reacts.
- If he smiles or seems comfortable with the touch, it could mean he likes you, although he may just be okay with being physically affectionate with his friends.
4
Compliment him to let him know what you like about him. A compliment is a great way to brighten someone else's day, and it can be a very effective flirting technique, as well. Try to compliment something about his personality or his accomplishments, for instance, to let him know that your feelings for him are more than just superficial.^{[19]
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- For example, you might say, "I thought it was really amazing how you stood up for Steven when he was being bullied."
- You could also say, "You always make me feel good about myself when I'm around. I really like that."
- It's okay to compliment his appearance, too, especially if he's recently changed something. For instance, if you say, "Hey Jeremy, your haircut looks great," it lets him know that you noticed his new 'do and you like it!
5
Invite him to hang out with you one-on-one to take things to the next level. You don't necessarily have to call it a date, but spending some time alone with your crush will give both of you a chance to figure out how the other one feels. Try to stick to something casual, so if the vibe isn't right, it won't be too awkward.^{[20]
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- For instance, you might ask him if he wants to grab a burger with you after school, or you might ask him if he'll meet you in the library for an hour after school to help you study for your Spanish mid-term.
6
Ask him to be your boyfriend if you want to be really bold. There's no reason you shouldn't ask out the guy you like if that's what you want to do! Wait until the two of you are alone, then let him know that you want him to be your boyfriend.^{[21]
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- For instance, you might say, "Hey Josh, I think you're a really great guy, and I'm really into you. Do you want to go out with me?"
- If you're shy, try sending him a text or a note telling him how you feel, instead.^{[22]
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Expert Q&A
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Question

How can I get a boy to fall for me at school?

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

Imad Jbara

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Support wikiHow by unlocking this expert answer.

Let him know that you're interested by talking to him. Give him compliments every now and then to make him feel good and want to spend some time with you.
Question

What if I WANT to change for a guy? Is that bad?

Amy Gremillion

Community Answer

Spend some time really meditating on what you want to change. If a guy inspires you to make a change for the better, and it's something you want to change about yourself anyway (like doing better in school or saying yes to invitations more often), there's nothing wrong with that. However, if you only want to make that change to attract the guy, then no, you shouldn't do that.
Question

I like a guy he looks at me any time we do eye contact very time but I am confused about he likes to me?

Amy Gremillion

Community Answer

It can be really hard to tell if a guy likes you, but don't worry about reading into every little sign. Just try to get to know him if you can. If he likes you, it will be obvious over time.