How to Be Fun and Flirty

Co-authored by Eddy Baller

Last Updated: March 12, 2023 References

Being fun and flirty starts with confidence and playfulness. For instance, smile often, make direct eye contact, and don’t be afraid to express yourself. When you’re alone with your crush, compliment them, touch them, and be spontaneous. Don’t be afraid to strut your stuff! With a little effort, you can be fun and flirty.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Acting Fun and Flirty

1
Smile often so you seem warm and approachable. To be fun and flirty, you want to be positive, upbeat, and genuine. Smiling at others as you pass them is an easy way to display these qualities. Do this all the time, and others will likely think you are fun and easygoing. Radiate your beautiful smile for the world to see, and you’ll seem confident and flirty.^{[1]
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- If you are insecure about your smile, that’s okay! Smile in front of the mirror to practice. Try different techniques, like opening your mouth more or tilting your chin down slightly, until you find the smile that makes you feel the best.
- While walking down the street, keep a smile on your face the whole time. You can listen to positive music or look at nature around you to boost your mood if need be.
2
Maintain a positive attitude so you seem fun and carefree. For instance, don't constantly talk about how stressed or busy you are, but instead keep a lighthearted, optimistic attitude for life. This way, others will think you're upbeat and fun, and they'll likely want to be around you more often.^{[2]
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- For example, instead of saying something like "Man, this week sucked. I was so busy with work, I barely got to relax," try saying "Wow, am I glad it's Friday!"
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3
Make direct eye contact with everyone you meet. Another way to show your flirtatious side is to lock eyes with people when you meet them, rather than looking away. This shows enthusiasm and deepens your connection instantly. Making eye contact also displays confidence and a self-assured attitude, which often seems effortlessly flirty as well.^{[3]
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Eddy Baller
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.}
- For example, when you are buying your morning coffee, make eye contact with the barista and smile back at them.
4
Express yourself without hesitation. Oftentimes self-expression and self-assured behavior seems fun, flirty, and intriguing, so don’t be afraid to dance in public, make a bold decision, or express your opinion. Expressing yourself without any reservations can make others interested in getting to know you better. This is an easy way to get cuties to engage with you.^{[5]
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- You can walk up to your crush and give them a note with your phone number.
- Try singing karaoke if you are at the bar with your friends.
5
Laugh and giggle all the time! An effortless way to show your fun side is by finding humor in every situation. Laugh at other people's jokes and giggle at your own mistakes, for instance. This shows you have a lighthearted, playful attitude.^{[6]
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- For example, if you take the wrong exit while driving home from work, laugh to yourself rather than getting upset over the mistake.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Flirting One-on-One

1
Flip your hair tastefully to capture your crush’s interest. Subtly flipping long hair out of your face or behind your shoulder is a classic flirtatious move. Place your hand underneath your hair, and quickly flip it behind you. Try not to be too obvious with your hair flip so this can seem effortless and irresistible.^{[7]
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2
Introduce yourself confidently when you want to break the ice. To seem fun and flirty to your crush, don’t be afraid to introduce yourself first. They may think your confidence is sexy, and your initiative will likely intrigue them.^{[8]
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Expert Source

Eddy Baller
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.}
- Do this if you are at a concert, bar, or social event and find someone you want to get to know better.
3
Compliment your crush to make them feel good. While chatting with a hottie, tell them things like, “Your outfit looks awesome,” or “Your hair color is gorgeous,” to boost their confidence. Throwing out compliments can seem flirty and fun, and you may seem more approachable and confident.^{[10]
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- For example, if you are on a coffee date, say something like, “I really like spending time with you. We should do this more often.”
- Compliment their physical appearance, intelligence, or personality traits, for instance.
4
Touch your crush appropriately to show them your flirty side. An easy way to come across confident is to incorporate flirtatious touching. Simply tap your crush on the arm, touch their shoulder gently, or stroke their hand in passing. This shows them you are into them without being too direct.^{[11]
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- For example, if you are chatting at school or at work, you can gently touch their arm as you say goodbye.
- Don't jump straight into doing this when you meet someone—you want to respect their space at first until they start to open up and feel more comfortable.^{[12]
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  Eddy Baller
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.}
5
Be spontaneous when making plans with others. Spontaneity can be fun and exciting, and they’ll likely think you’re up for anything! For instance, shoot your crush a text saying something like, “I really want some Chinese food! Want to go grab lunch?”^{[13]
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- If you recently went on a first date, text your date and say something like, “Hey, I really enjoyed our date last week. What are you up to tonight?”
- If you’re in a relationship, you can text your partner while at work and say, “I booked us a romantic weekend getaway. It’s a surprise but pack a backpack and come over after work!”
6
Tease your crush to show your playful side. There’s nothing more fun and flirty than a little innocent teasing. To do this, get creative and improvise depending on the situation. You can wink at your crush as they walk past you, send a suggestive text message, or joke around when chatting.^{[14]
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- For example, mimic or mock something they say in a harmless way. You can make fun of their accent or repeat their words back to them.
- Give your crush a silly nickname and call them by it regularly. For example, you can say something like, “Since you laugh all the time, I’m calling you Giggles.”
7
Invite your crush to go on a fun, exciting date. To seem fun and flirty, it's helpful to keep up with cool events and new businesses popping up in your area. This way, you'll always have a fun event coming up to look forward to. Ask your crush to hit the new Spanish restaurant that just opened up downtown for a new, interesting date idea.^{[15]
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- To find events in your area, read the newspaper, check online, or review social media events.
- For example, you can go to a concert on a Friday night, go to a Saturday farmer's market or craft show, or hit a gallery opening.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Looking Fun and Flirty

1
Be hygienic so you look and smell great. Shower daily, wash your face every day, and brush your teeth twice a day. Put on deodorant before you leave the house, and do your laundry every week or so. Doing these things will help you look and smell awesome so you can flirt with confidence.^{[16]
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- In addition, it’s a good idea to get a haircut every 4-6 weeks and cut your nails regularly.
- Shave 1 or more times a week to keep your skin smooth and touchable.
2
Dress in clothes that make you feel confident and sexy. You don’t have to wear sexy clothing to feel confident and cute in your outfits. Pick a button-down, jeans, dress, skirt, or blouse that boosts your confidence. Fill your wardrobe with awesome items that make you feel great so you can feel fun and flirty in any outfit.^{[17]
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- Put on a form-fitting white tee and a pair of tailored, dark-washed jeans for a casual yet playful look.
- Wear a pencil skirt with a cream-colored lace blouse for a feminine style that you can play up for work or for a night out.
- If you wear very revealing clothing, you may seem desperate rather than flirty. Be tasteful with the amount of visible cleavage, for example.
3
Pick clothing or accessories that show off your neck. In particular, showing off your neck is a flirty gesture that may get the interest of your crush. Choose tops with a “V”-cut to show off your neckline, and try wearing a choker-style necklace to draw attention to your neck. This is an easy way to add a subtle flirty touch.^{[18]
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Try cute and sexy hairstyles like tousled waves or a high ponytail. Styling your hair in a sexy way can instantly boost your confidence level. Tousled waves are flirty because they can mimic that sexy, bedhead style. High ponytails are fun because you can show off your facial features and neck. You can feel flirty and cute with nearly any hairstyles, but search online for inspiration if you want ideas.^{[19]
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- To make tousled waves, try braiding your hair and sleeping with them in to make instant curls. You can also use a curling iron to curl all of your hair. Then, use a blowdryer or your hands to tousle the curls into soft, relaxed waves.
- For a high ponytail, comb all of your hair back and grasp it at the crown of your head. Secure your hair with an elastic hair tie. It is helpful to spray a light, even layer of hairspray to reduce frizz or flyaway hairs.
- For a masculine, flirty style, try rubbing a dime-size amount of gel in your hands and running it through your hair. Comb your hair backward for a slicked-back, sleek style.
5
Apply some makeup if you want to enhance and define your features. Use a dime-size amount of liquid foundation to cover your forehead, cheeks, nose, and chin. Apply eyeliner and mascara to define your eyes. If you’d like, you can fill in your brows with an eyebrow pencil and dust some eyeshadow over your lids. Wear blush for a flushed, rosy glow, and add red lipstick or lip gloss for a kissable touch.^{[20]
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- Add more or less makeup, based on personal preference.
- You can also set your foundation with mineral setting powder so your makeup stays on all day.
- Defining your eyes can help you feel sexy and confident, so you can easily make eye contact with cute passersby.
6
Exercise at least 3 times a week to maintain a great physique. To be fun and flirty, it’s important to be positive and feel confident, so work out for 20-30 minutes or longer every day if you can. Regular exercise keeps your body healthy, and it’s known to also boost mood and prevent depression. Do cardiovascular activities, such as running, hiking, or playing sports, to get your heart rate up.^{[21]
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- You can also jog on a treadmill, take a walk with your friends, or lift weights at the gym.
- Create an exercise schedule that works with your day-to-day life. If you can only go to the gym a couple times a week, that’s okay.

What Are The Dos And Don'Ts Of Body Language When Flirting?

Community Q&A

Question

How do I talk to a girl I don't know?

Karley Snyder

Community Answer

Start simple! Go up to her and say hello and introduce yourself. Ask her what her name is and where she is from. You can talk about where you go to school or what you do for a living. Bring up a funny personal story or a unique fact.
Question

What if you are not good at pickup lines?

Karley Snyder

Community Answer

That's okay! Try telling a funny joke or winking at your crush instead. You don't have to use a pickup line to be flirty.
Question

What if I am shy?

Karley Snyder

Community Answer

If you're shy, try stepping out of your comfort zone a little so you can make the first move. You can also play up your shyness as a flirty method! Try making eye contact with a cutie, then immediately looking away. You can flip your hair or subtly wink at them, to show them you're interested, but don't make the first move.

Warnings

Don't flirt with people that you aren't interested in. This could lead them on and hurt their feelings.

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Avoid excessively bragging about yourself or only talking about yourself. While this may make you feel confident, it may be a turn-off for some people.

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