How to Talk Sexy Around Boys

Give your sex appeal a boost with this practical guide

Co-authored by Nicole Moore

Last Updated: December 30, 2022 References

It can be hard to say what you think when it comes to boys, especially when what you're thinking is worth a blush or two. You get all tongue tied, and shy, just when you want to be sexy and witty. While there's no simple "1-2-3" general guide to sexy talk, we have some suggestions that might help you say those sexy things to your crush. Read on!

Steps

1
Be prepared. That's what the Boy Scouts say. But we're going to use that to make a Boy Scout blush.
- Take a look at yourself in the mirror, then close your eyes. Think about something or somebody you think is super sexy. Think about that with your eyes closed, until you are feeling undeniably sexy. Now open your eyes, and take a look. That's a look you want to recreate!
- Listen to voices, and see how guys respond. Sexy is as much in the tone as it is in the words you use.^{[1]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Nicole Moore
  Love & Relationship Coach
  Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.} Low and throaty is always a safe bet, but if your voice is not ready for that, soft and sweet works well too.
2
Don't say, "I love you" right away. Start with saying phrases such as "I must really like you." This turns guys on without sounding too serious, too soon.
3
Practice your "look." Once you know what your sexy look is, practice it on yourself, until you can get that "look" whenever you want.^{[2]
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Expert Source

Nicole Moore
Love & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.} Try variations on it:
- Look directly ahead with a no-nonsense "yes, you" gaze.^{[3]
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- Bend your head down, and look up with your eyes. It's sort of the opposite of the direct gaze, but still very sexy to guys.
- As you're waking away from him, turn your head and eyes towards him, and smile. If that doesn't make his knees quiver, nothing will!
4
Appreciate him, and let him know.^{[4]
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Expert Source

Alessandra Conti
Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 23 April 2021.} Nothing is sexier than telling somebody how much you appreciate things about them, especially the little things.^{[5]
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Research source}
- When you're talking to him, focus on him, no matter who else is around—even if the hottest guy around walks into the room. Focusing on him alone is most definitely sexy. Think about it: if Selena Gomez walked into the room while he's talking to you, and his gaze never wandered from you for an instant, how would you feel?^{[6]
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5
Don't overdo it. Being a little bit aloof means that you're not going to be taken for granted. Look like you don't really care if he responds or not, and enjoy yourself!^{[7]
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- Try making eye contact, smiling, and then looking away as if you’ve got something else oon your mind.^{[8]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Nicole Moore
  Love & Relationship Coach
  Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.}
6
Use his imagination. If the goal is to make him think sexy thoughts about you, then there's no better place to start than his own imagination. Try using subtle cues when talking. It might be a sexy smile, or touching your lips while listening to him, or even saying something that is borderline naughty, like "It is so hot today, I could just toss off all my clothes and dance naked in the fountain!"
- Ask him questions that will get his imagination going! That will give him the impression that you really care about what he thinks.^{[9]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Nicole Moore
  Love & Relationship Coach
  Expert Interview. 6 October 2021.}
7
Touch him while talking.^{[10]
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Expert Source

Alessandra Conti
Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 23 April 2021.} Don't just use "friend" touches. Part of talking sexy is being sexy. When you're saying something flirty, run a finger down his forearm towards his hand. He will like that.^{[11]
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8
Use words well. Learn how to use double entendres. Those are words or phrases open to two interpretations, one of which is usually risqué or indecent.

Expert Q&A

Question

How can you make your crush fall in love with you?

Alessandra Conti
Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Alessandra Conti is a Celebrity Matchmaker, Dating Coach, and Co-Founder of Matchmakers In The City, a personal Matchmaking firm headquartered in Los Angeles, California. Alessandra is a Matchmaker behind MTV's, “Are You The One”, and is the go-to Celebrity Matchmaker for shows like NBC's Access Hollywood, and CBS's Face The Truth. Her dating and relationship advice has been featured on Forbes, Elite Daily, The New Yorker, The LA Times, and Fox News. For nearly 10 years, Alessandra has worked with clients ranging from celebrities to young professionals and leads a team of matchmakers responsible for hundreds of marriages through their knowledge of interpersonal relationships, body language, and lie detection. She holds a BA in Communications from American University and is a Matchmaking Institute Certified Matchmaker (CMM).

Alessandra Conti

Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach

Expert Answer

Be yourself. Be the best version of yourself. Figure out what your crush's love languages are and give them that to be yourself. Do not try to be the person that you think that they want to be, figure out their love languages, express that to them, but ultimately be the best version of yourself and, and shine. And when you're shining. Then you're seductive.
Question

How do you attract someone you like?

Alessandra Conti
Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach
Alessandra Conti is a Celebrity Matchmaker, Dating Coach, and Co-Founder of Matchmakers In The City, a personal Matchmaking firm headquartered in Los Angeles, California. Alessandra is a Matchmaker behind MTV's, “Are You The One”, and is the go-to Celebrity Matchmaker for shows like NBC's Access Hollywood, and CBS's Face The Truth. Her dating and relationship advice has been featured on Forbes, Elite Daily, The New Yorker, The LA Times, and Fox News. For nearly 10 years, Alessandra has worked with clients ranging from celebrities to young professionals and leads a team of matchmakers responsible for hundreds of marriages through their knowledge of interpersonal relationships, body language, and lie detection. She holds a BA in Communications from American University and is a Matchmaking Institute Certified Matchmaker (CMM).

Alessandra Conti

Celebrity Matchmaker & Dating Coach

Expert Answer

So attraction begins with feeling attractive. So it's so important to work on yourself and to really feel attractive in the way that you look, the way that you're presenting yourself, and the way that you're feeling. Considering that men and women, are both visual creatures. So a very easy thing to do to kind of boost your levels of attraction is to start taking care of your body, going to the gym.

Warnings

Don't try to be someone you're not. If you don't feel sexy, you won't be sexy.

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Don't overdo it on trying to have a husky voice, or the boy you are trying to impress will think you are ill.

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Remember: You don't have to try to impress anybody unless you really want to.

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If you overdo it, it may come across as desperate.

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