How to Be Cocky Funny over Text

Written by Imad Jbara | Edited by Madeleine Flamiano

Last Updated: May 21, 2022 References

Want to make someone cute laugh and get their attention right away? Sending cocky funny texts to your crush can kick things up a notch and make you seem cool and confident. If you’re ready to get a little flirty and really bold, we’ve got you covered. In this article, we’ll share fun ways to be cocky funny over text—try a couple out to crack up your crush and show off how confident you are.

This article is based on an interview with our professional relationship coach, Imad Jbara. Check out the full interview here.

1

“I’m here. What were your other two wishes?”

A little bit of arrogance will grab their attention. Just make sure your text is so over the top that it’s obviously a joke. Send it as an opener to kick off the convo and talk about how great you are. They’ll either laugh or totally agree with you.^{[1]
X
Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 28 September 2021.}
- “You've missed me. In fact, you’ve been thinking about me all day. 😏”^{[2]
  X
  Research source}
- “Admit it. Life just isn’t the same without me around.”
- “Name one other person who kills your boredom like I do. I’ll wait.”

2

“You’ll have to wait for a piece of this!”

Play hard to get to work up their appetite. You can either text them out of the blue, or you can hit back and say you're really busy if they ask to hang out. You’ll fire up their curiosity, and they’ll wonder when they can finally have you to themselves.^{[3]
X
Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 28 September 2021.}
- “I’ve got way too much to do. Get in line if you want some of my time! ⌚”
- “I’ve got a lot on my plate. If I’m going to drop everything, what do you bring to the table?”
- “You’ll never meet anyone more busy than me. I swear.”

3

“I’m such a bad influence….”

Talk about the trouble you got into and they’ll imagine how wild you are. When you open up about your day, focus on any new or exciting details. Also share any ways you were adventurous. They’ll crave hearing more updates from you.^{[4]
X
Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 28 September 2021.}
- “My friends shouldn’t bring me to the club. 🍸 I steal the show every time…”
- “You won’t believe this, but I met a professional mime today, and I asked him if he’d teach me some top-secret moves…”
- “I’m not a role model, but, you know what. I shake things up. Today, I…”

4

“Busy day! Anyway, I’m going to bed.”

Play up a sense of mystery to keep their mind on you. If they reach out to you, wait 3 or more hours to reply. Give vague details about what you’ve been up to, then just disappear. They’ll want to know all your secrets, and they’ll want to chat ASAP.^{[5]
X
Expert Source

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.}
- “One adventure after the other! I’ll hit you back after I get some sleep. 😴”
- “Today was a trip. Way too much to say about it. But not right now!”
- “Oh, hey, you texted! It’s been non-stop today. I promise I’ll catch up with you tomorrow.”

5

“Just finished my shift and hung up my cape!”

Text them something random to show off your creativity. Stand out from the crowd and send a quick story you just made up. You’ll score extra points if it’s a line your crush has never heard before. They’ll forget anyone else they’re talking to and be hooked on you.^{[6]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- “Being a full-time Netflix viewer is tiring. 🎞️ Need to cut my workload in half!”
- “Just got enlisted in the CIA today…”
- “Signed up for extreme ironing. My biceps are next-level now. 💪🏼”

6

“We’d fight all the time… and I’d win!”

Joke about playful arguments to spark some chemistry. Tease them and work them up to create some tension. ^{[7]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.} When you use a chill and casual tone, they’ll know your little debates are just for fun.
- “You really think that?! Wait till you hear my opinion. You’ll rip me apart. 🦁”
- “Jeez, how’re we ever going to get along?! 😜”
- “Can we find one thing to agree on? 😉”

7

“Just DMing you because you seem like a cool person.”

Use a laidback compliment to come off as relaxed. Make them smile with a sincere comment about a hobby or interest of theirs.^{[8]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.} They won’t be able to tell if you’re hitting on them or just making a new friend because you’re so social.
- “Hey, you love mixed-breed dogs, too. 🐕‍🦺 I like that.”^{[9]
  X
  Research source}
- “That’s an impressive mural. You really painted that?”
- “That vid of you bowling… wow. 🎳 I want you on my team.”

8

“You’re smart. Ready to be my personal assistant?”

Praise their intelligence and throw in some sarcasm to shock them. Bring up one of their traits that you really admire, then follow up with a funny comment. They’re more likely to think you’re honest instead of just "nice" because you were so bold and creative.^{[10]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- “You always know what to say! You can be my speech writer. 📝”
- “Good comebacks. 💥 Can I borrow some? I’d really pull them off.”
- "That was really deep! 😲 Did you get that from a book or something?”

9

“Give your parents a high five for me. Nice work, there.”

Send indirect flattery and they’ll want the spotlight on them. Hint that they’re attractive or smart.^{[11]
X
Expert Source

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.} When you use a clever way to highlight what you like about them, they’ll want you to confess exactly how you’ll feel. You’ll create a fun little game that they’ll get addicted to.
- “That fancy education was put to good use! 👍”
- “That outfit looks insanely elegant. Great purchase. 🏷️”
- “That song was spellbinding. 🎙️ Who’s your vocal coach?”

10

“That’s how you’re planning on seducing me? Might work.”

Ask a flirty question to create some tension. If you noticed a new side to their personality on social media or they just made a remark that made you laugh, talk about the effect it had on you. Act like you’re not totally won over just yet. They’ll be curious about what will finally do the trick.^{[12]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- “You bake? Trying to win my heart? Maybe if you send some cookies over…🍪”
- “You’re funny. 😆 I might fall for you if you tell too many jokes. Slow down.”
- “You’re nice. Maybe… too nice. 🤔 You seem too good to be true.”

11

“Need someone cute to distract me.”

Confess your crush to show off how bold you are. Express your attraction to them, but act very casual.^{[13]
X
Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 28 September 2021.} When you compliment their looks, mention that you’re a little bored. They’ll get the sense that you’re after more than just appearances, but they'll probably also blush because you noticed them.
- “I’d love for you to come over. You’re easy on the eyes. 👀”
- “I’m bored, but I bet you can change that, cutie. 😉”
- “I need a way to pass the time. You’re fun and hot, so why not? 🔥”

12

“Today is your lucky day… you get to go out with me.”

Joke that it's rare to score a date with you to make them smirk. Tell them that you’re finally ready to spend one-on-one time together.^{[14]
X
Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 28 September 2021.} When you make a big deal about how special they should feel, they’ll likely dig your sense of humor and imagine all the ways you’ll entertain them.
- “You won the lotto! 🎫 A whole day with me!”
- ”You’re about to go on a whirlwind adventure. 🗺️ You get to see me.”
- “Some people get all the luck. 🍀 Just don't rub it in that you get to date me!”

13

“Just get this over with and buy me dinner already!”

Playfully get on their case to ask you out to jump start a connection. If you sense that they’re dropping a lot of hints or that you two are having an awesome conversation, suddenly bring up the possibility for a date. Make it sound like it was their idea and they might just make the first move.^{[15]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.}
- “This is getting old. 🙄 I know you like me. Just ask me out already!”
- “Try something new. 🎉 Work up the courage to admit you like me.”
- “Treat yourself and buy me dinner. 🍝 You know you want to.”

14

“Wear something nice and meet me tonight.”

Be super assertive to make their heart race. You could win a lot of points if you take the lead.^{[16]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.} After you’ve tested the waters and feel they’re comfortable with you, text a spontaneous invite. If they're shy, they'll like that you took initiative, and if they're more upfront, they'll like that you beat them to the punch.
- “Don’t make any plans tonight. I have a spot I want to take you to.”
- “Put your best outfit on. I want to show you off.”
- “Can you be ready in a couple hours? I know a restaurant you’d love.”^{[17]
  X
  Research source}

15

“Any skills? I’ll date you if you’d survive on a desert island.”

Make them explain why you need them so they’ll want your approval. Play off a question as random and hypothetical.^{[18]
X
Expert Source

Imad Jbara
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 22 September 2021.} Tease them a little bit and bring up what you want in someone you’re dating. You’ll encourage them to think about a relationship, and they might start to find ways to impress you.
- “Can you hold your own during a trivia night? 📚 I need someone who knows random facts.”^{[19]
  X
  Research source}
- “Are you down for a little trouble? 😈 I need a partner in crime.”
- “Do you love to speak your mind? 🔊 I like someone who's opinionated.”

16

“I know I’m wildly interesting, but let’s talk about you.”

Drop the cockiness and ask them to open up to create some closeness. Once you’ve experimented with some witty one-liners, shift the convo to an even friendlier tone. Say how interested you are to learn more about them.^{[20]
X
Expert Source

Julianne Cantarella
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 6 August 2021.} They’ll probably love how you’re the total package—cocky, funny, and actually pretty sweet.
- “Yeah, I’m amazing, but I bet you are, too. 🙂 Let’s focus on you, now.”
- “I’m just playing with you. 😂 Seriously, I like talking to you.”
- “Just wanted to break the ice! 🧊 ⛏️ How’ve you been?”
- Use emojis here and there to show that it is lighthearted and fun.^{[21]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Cher Gopman
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 17 May 2019.}
- Don't stick to one topic for too long.^{[22]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Cher Gopman
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 17 May 2019.}
- Send an interesting photo or song saying that it reminds you of them.^{[23]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Cher Gopman
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 17 May 2019.}

Expert Q&A

Question

How can I make my text conversations interesting?

Cher Gopman
Dating Coach
Cher Gopman is the Founder of NYC Wingwoman LLC, a date coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Cher is a Certified Life Coach, a former psychiatric nurse, and her work has been featured on Inside Edition, Fox, ABC, VH1, and The New York Post.

Cher Gopman

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

You can use emojis to make the text messages fun. Besides this, do not stick to one topic for too long. Otherwise, the conversation may be boring.
Question

What can I do to create a common ground for both of us?

Cher Gopman
Dating Coach
Cher Gopman is the Founder of NYC Wingwoman LLC, a date coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Cher is a Certified Life Coach, a former psychiatric nurse, and her work has been featured on Inside Edition, Fox, ABC, VH1, and The New York Post.

Cher Gopman

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

You can share a photo or a song with your partner and say that it reminds you of them.