12 Telltale Signs a Church Guy Likes You

Co-authored by Jan & Jillian Yuhas and Christopher M. Osborne, PhD

Last Updated: June 6, 2022 References

That nice “church guy” you know might be more polite and respectful than the average guy, but he’ll still show his interest in you in many of the same ways. So what signs should you be looking for? In this article, we’ll guide you through a thorough list of “I like you” hints to watch for from a Christian guy—and point out some ways for you to show that you like him as well!

1

He invites you to church services or events.

He’ll want to spend time with you and support your spiritual growth. Depending on your current religious circumstances, he may start slow—for instance, asking “Do you mind if I pray for you?” From there, he might invite you to a church social event (like a youth group outing or a movie night) and eventually to a religious service with him.^{[1]
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- If you’re hesitant about doing church activities with him, don’t expect him to just give up. Instead, he’ll likely shift to a more long-range strategy, focusing on praying for you and building up a relationship in hopes that you’ll change your mind over time.
- If you want to show that you’re interested in him, beat him to the punch and invite him to a church event!

2

He asks you about what you believe and why.

Understanding your beliefs helps him evaluate your compatibility. This is a fairly normal part of getting to know someone better, but will likely carry even more importance because of his religious perspective. He’s looking for compatibility, of course, but also self-awareness—evidence that you’ve really put a lot of thought into what you believe.^{[2]
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- This doesn’t mean you need to have all the answers—it’s a good sign if you have struggles and questions and an acceptance that there’s more for you to learn, feel, and understand. This shows you’re open to growth.
- Don’t let yourself feel like you’re being quizzed or interrogated. Just share your thoughts and feelings in a way that’s comfortable for you, and ask him questions of your own.
- Asking thoughtful questions is a clear sign of genuine interest. "Players" won't take the time to get to know your values and what's important to you.^{[3]
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  Expert Source
  
  Jan & Jillian Yuhas
  Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
  Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.}

3

He wants to see your faith (or moral code) in action.

It’s important to him that you’re a good and caring person. This is something every guy wants to see, but probably even more so for a Christian. One of his main goals is to live by the “golden rule”—treating others like he wants to be treated—so he’ll definitely appreciate any signs that you aim to live by that same code.^{[4]
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- If you come from a similar faith tradition as him, he’ll be looking for a compatibility between what you say you believe and how you live what you believe.
- Alternatively, if you come from a different (or no) religious background, he’ll likely want to see if you act in ways that are at least generally compatible with his beliefs.

4

He confides in you about his life and future plans.

Doing this reveals a growing comfort level and amount of trust. He might share elements of his faith journey, possibly including difficulties and doubts he has faced (and might currently be facing). He might also start talking more about his future and subtly look for signs that you approve of it. After all, if he really likes you, he hopes you will also be a part of his future!^{[5]
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- It’s also possible that he’s confiding in you because you’ve become a close friend—but not a romantic interest. So don’t rely on this alone as clear a sign that he likes you romantically.

5

He appreciates you being comfortable in your own skin.

If he likes you, it means he accepts you for who you are. There certainly may be elements of your personality or lifestyle or beliefs that he hopes you’ll be inspired to change, possibly with his help. But he’s not looking for you to pretend to be someone you’re not. He likes the authentic you and wants you to achieve the highest version of yourself (according to his Christian understanding of your “highest version”).^{[6]
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Expert Source

Jan & Jillian Yuhas
Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.}
- The more comfortable you are being yourself and loving yourself, the more attractive you’ll be to guys. Even more importantly, being comfortable in your own skin is essential to your physical and emotional wellbeing.
- He's more likely to see you as a long-term partner when you confidently know your worth, share your vulnerabilities, have aspirations in life, possess great listening skills, and make quality time for the connection to grow.^{[8]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Jan & Jillian Yuhas
  Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
  Expert Interview. 19 August 2021.}

6

He doesn’t mind if you pursue him in a thoughtful manner.

If you like him too, go ahead and let him know! As a religious guy, he might be turned off if you go after him in an aggressive or highly-sexualized manner. But that doesn’t mean he wants you to be completely passive, either. Drop little hints that you like him—similar to the hints he’s giving you—or just tell him directly.^{[9]
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- It’s okay to drop hints and wait for him to ask you out, but it’s just as okay for you to take the initiative and ask him out.
- If you’re ready to ask him out, keep it simple and straightforward: “Jake, would you like to go out to lunch with me on Saturday?”

7

You believe God put him in your life so you can be together.

Trust your faith and feelings if you’re also a religious person. No, the average matchmaker wouldn’t include “faith in God’s plan” as a sign that you’re meant to get together with a particular guy. But if you have that faith that this guy is meant to be a part of your life, trust that God will inspire him to have those same feelings for you. Some signs that a guy likes you (and that you like him) can come from a higher power!
- Pray about what you’re feeling and for guidance about how to approach things with the guy.
- Look for signs that he’s a genuinely Godly person—that he truly tries to explore his faith, live his faith, share his faith, and make amends when he falls short of his faith.

8

He pays close attention to what you say and how you look.

His memory and eye for detail may seem to magically improve. Well, that is, at least when it comes to details about the object of his interest—you. You might notice him saying things like the following:^{[10]
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- “Hey, you changed your hairstyle a little. It looks very nice that way.”
- “Last week you mentioned you had a dental appointment that you weren’t looking forward to. How did that end up going?”
- “That’s a nice new cover you got for your Bible. Where did you find that one?”

9

He gives compliments that go beyond your looks.

He’ll praise things like your personality, compassion, and spirituality. It’s natural and inevitable that a guy is going to want to flatter someone he likes with compliments about their beauty. But a Christian guy in particular may be more eager to compliment your religious faith and practices as well.^{[11]
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- He might, for instance, use a physical compliment to lead into a deeper compliment about how you practice your faith: “You look great today—you’re glowing! It’s obvious how much fulfillment you get from teaching the second-grade Sunday school class.”
- If you’re interested in him, too, try giving compliments that similarly go beyond just his good looks: “You look cool in that K-LOVE t-shirt! I heard that you interned at the radio station last summer—that’s a really great way to share your faith.”

10

He craves positive feedback from you.

Watch for some extra “pep in his step” when you respond well. When you laugh at one of his jokes, ask him for some advice, or just choose to walk up to him and say hello, does he get super enthused with a big smile? If so, it’s probably because every little bit of positive feedback you provide gives him hope that you’re interested in him.^{[12]
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- Everyone likes getting positive feedback, so compare how he reacts to your positive feedback versus that from other people. If he seems happy when other people thank him but ecstatic when you do it, that’s a strong signal!
- To give effective positive feedback in the form of a compliment, be specific and direct: “Cal, you did a great job doing the Old Testament reading during yesterday’s service. You read with enthusiasm and did a great job pronouncing all those tricky names!”

11

He tries to help you out and also impress you.

Watch for him to take his desire to be a good person to the next level. As a Christian guy, he’s almost certainly been taught to “help thy neighbor” without concern for recognition or rewards. But, if he likes you, it’s natural for him to do a bit more to show you kindness and to feel a bit of pride if you seem impressed.^{[13]
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- He might not openly strive for your recognition like some other guys you may have come across, but you’ll probably notice an extra glint in his eye when you show any sign of being impressed.

12

He does his best to make you laugh.

Religious or not, this is pretty much an every-guy strategy. He probably assumes that you—like most everyone—find a good sense of humor to be attractive, so he’ll definitely want to showcase his fun (and funny) side. He may not go into a full-on comedy routine, but he’ll likely be more jokey than usual when you’re around.^{[14]
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- Especially if you come from outside his faith tradition, he may worry that you think a religious guy like him is serious all the time. In that case, he may try even harder to show off his funny side.

13

He makes a lot of friendly eye contact.

This is a universal human trait that shows interest. Eye contact equals connection, so he’s naturally going to want to lock eyes with you. If he’s shy he might glance away pretty quickly, but he’ll be sure to look your way again soon!^{[15]
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- We’re talking about friendly glances here, usually paired with a smile. Steer clear of a Christian guy—or any guy—who gives you an aggressive or creepy stare-down.

14

He displays welcoming body language toward you.

He’ll want to focus and close in on you without causing worry. Observe his body language carefully, because it’s sure to reveal some “tells” that he may not even be aware of. Any of the following can be signs that a guy is interested in you:^{[16]
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- He turns his body, from head to toe, directly towards you.
- He keeps his arms visible and to his sides in an “open” gesture.
- He removes obstacles between you, such as a bag that’s resting on the table.
- He leans in towards you, or subtly shuffles (if standing) or slides (if sitting) closer to you.
- He reaches out to touch you in a non-threatening, non-sexualized way, such as by lightly touching your forearm as you both laugh at a joke.

15

He gets fidgety and a bit self-conscious around you.

Even confident guys get nervous and worry about how they look. You might, for example, notice him running his fingers through his hair or adjusting his shirt a lot. Such activity is both nervous fidgeting and an unconscious effort to “preen” himself so he looks as attractive to you as possible.^{[17]
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- If you notice that he wears the best of his “Sunday best” outfits when you’re around, that’s another strong sign that he’s trying to look extra-good for you!
- While this isn’t true in all cases, a Christian guy may be more fidgety and nervous in this situation than the average guy. Why? He may put more pressure on himself to handle his attraction toward you in a respectful fashion.

Expert Q&A

Question

How do you attract a man and make him want you?

Jan & Jillian Yuhas
Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
Jan Yuhas and Jillian Yuhas are Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists and the Founders of Entwined Lifestyle. They specialize in helping individuals and couples work on effective communication, healthy boundaries, and lifestyle wellness. They have also been featured on media outlets such as Yahoo Lifestyle and Bustle. Jan and Jillian both hold a BA in Psychology from The University of Illinois at Chicago and an MA in Marriage and Family Therapy from The Adler School of Professional Psychology.

Jan & Jillian Yuhas

Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists

Expert Answer

Attracting a good guy begins with owning your self-worth and living a fulfilling life. Confidence is one of the most desired traits a man will seek in partner, as he's attracted to someone who will compliment his lifestyle. He will desire a partner who seeks hobbies, passion projects, career goals, and maintain an optimistic outlook on life.
Question

How do you know if he is the right man for you?

Jan & Jillian Yuhas
Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists
Jan Yuhas and Jillian Yuhas are Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists and the Founders of Entwined Lifestyle. They specialize in helping individuals and couples work on effective communication, healthy boundaries, and lifestyle wellness. They have also been featured on media outlets such as Yahoo Lifestyle and Bustle. Jan and Jillian both hold a BA in Psychology from The University of Illinois at Chicago and an MA in Marriage and Family Therapy from The Adler School of Professional Psychology.

Jan & Jillian Yuhas

Relationship Coaches & Boundary Specialists

Expert Answer

Your relationship values provide a road map for relationship success to determine who will be a good man. Some examples of relationship values are, but not limited to: integrity, trust, honesty, loyalty, communication, kindness, and growth mindset. It's important to align on at least 3 of your relationship values to build a strong foundation with a partner for a long-term, loving relationship.