How to Make a Long Distance Boyfriend Jealous (and Get Him to Think about You!)

Co-authored by John Keegan and Hannah Madden

Last Updated: August 25, 2021 References

Being in a long distance relationship is tough, especially if your partner isn’t giving you a lot of attention. If you feel like your boyfriend is ignoring you, making him jealous is one way to get him thinking about you all the time. Keep in mind, though, that jealousy can be tough on relationships, and it’s not the best way to work through your problems.

Here are 10 different ways you can get your long distance boyfriend thinking about you (and make him feel a little jealous in the process).

1

Send him hot a selfie.

Get him guessing about what you’re doing and who you’re with. Get all dolled up and then snap a quick pic to show him. If he asks about your plans, try to be vague and don’t tell him much. Even if you’re just sitting at home with your hair and makeup done, he’ll be wondering who you got all dressed up for.^{[1]
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- Bonus points if you text him a hot selfie and then stop replying for a few hours.

2

Go out with your friends.

Make sure to post lots of pictures, too. Go out to a bar, a club, or hit the town in your cutest outfit. Then, put the photos on social media where you know he’ll see them. When he sees that you’re having tons of fun without him, he’ll probably wish he was there with you.^{[2]
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Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach
Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.}^{[3]
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- You could also have your friends post pictures and tag you in them. That way, it won’t seem like you’re intentionally trying to make him jealous.

3

Ignore his texts.

Or at least wait a while to text back. If you always reply within minutes of him texting you, he’ll know he has you wrapped around his finger. A good rule of thumb is to wait 10 to 30 minutes before responding.^{[4]
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- You can do this with phone calls, too. If he calls you, ignore it and call him back a little later. He’ll wonder what you were doing that made you too busy for a phone call.
- This might work to get his attention, but in the long run, you should probably have a real conversation about whatever is bothering you.^{[5]
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  Expert Source
  
  John Keegan
  Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.}

4

Don’t commit to plans with him.

Be wishy washy about when you’ll see each other next. If he suggests a visit sometimes soon, say something like, “Yeah, I’ll have to check my calendar.” If you sound too busy to hang out with him, he’ll probably wonder who else you have plans with.^{[6]
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- Be careful with this one—in long distance relationships, it’s super important to visit each other in person as often as you can. If you blow him off too much, he might lose interest in the relationship.

5

Sound really busy.

Make it seem like you have plans all the time. If he asks what you’re up to, tell him you’re going out to a club or hanging out with friends. Try not to tell him when you’re bored or just lounging around the house, since that can make it seem like you can’t have fun without him.^{[7]
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- You could also say something like, “Omg, I’m soooo tired. I had the craziest weekend ever.”

6

Be vague about what you’re doing.

Leave a little mystery surrounding your plans for the day. If you’re going out to dinner, don’t tell him exactly who will be there (even if it’s just a group of friends). When you don’t get specific, he’ll probably make up facts to fill in the gaps, which can leave him feeling jealous.^{[8]
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- You could also say something like, “I was thinking about heading into the city today. I might meet up with someone I know there.”

7

Tell him that someone hit on you.

Let him know that someone else gave you attention. Try to mention it casually in a phone call or over text so it doesn’t sound like you’re bragging. You don’t have to get super specific, and you can even make it up if you want to.^{[9]
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- Say something like, “A guy tried to give me his number last night. I told him thanks but no thanks, but he just wouldn’t drop it!”

8

Mention other guys.

Casually name drop your guy friends in a conversation. You could mention how one of them gave you a ride home or just got a new haircut. The more you mention other dudes, the more your boyfriend will wonder about who you’re hanging out with and what you two are doing. Say stuff like:^{[10]
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- “Chris gave me a ride home from work last night.”
- “Did you see Jacob’s new haircut? It looks pretty good!”

9

Compliment his friends.

Make him think you like them more than him. Even if you don’t see his friends very often, you can still stalk their social media and get info that way. Try to casually mention that you think his friends are cool (or even compare them to him). For instance:^{[11]
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- “It’s so cool that James helped his girlfriend move. Remember when I moved? I don’t think you helped me at all!”
- “I saw Robbie’s new car, it looks pretty cool.”

10

Talk about your ex.

There’s no better way to make someone jealous. You don’t have to go overboard, but you can mention things that your ex used to do that you really liked. Even if your boyfriend isn’t the jealous type, name-dropping someone you used to date will surely get him green with envy.^{[12]
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- For example, you might say, “Oh, I remember when me and Shawn went there! It was a really romantic restaurant.”
- Or, “We should totally go to Hawaii next summer. Kyle and I vacationed there one year, and it was so much fun.”

Warnings

Making someone jealous on purpose isn’t a great way to build a healthy relationship. If you’re trying to send your boyfriend a message, it’s better to talk it out with him.^{[13]
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