How to Figure Out if Someone Likes You over Text

Co-authored by Mark Rosenfeld and Jessica Gibson

Last Updated: August 2, 2022 References

Texting is fantastic for a lot of reasons but it does present some unique challenges. For instance, how can you detect chemistry when you can't read a person's body language? Fortunately, if someone's attracted to you, they'll usually send predictable types of texts—flirty, curious, complimentary. Read through their texts with our suggestions in mind to figure out if someone's crushing on you. It's not a fool-proof method. It's entirely possible for someone to do a couple of these things without intending to ask you out.

1

Playful messages

Read the tone of the texts to see if they're fun, playful, or coy. Most people won't obviously come out and text something like, "I like you. Do you want to go out?" You'll have to read between the lines and pay attention to the mood of their texts. Maybe they gently tease or joke with you, for instance.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 11 June 2021.}
- If they sound businesslike and professional, they're probably not trying to flirt with you.
- They might text, "I'd love to visit Europe one day. Till then, I'll settle for Italian food. You don't know any good spots, do you?"

2

Frequent texts

Messaging throughout the day means they're thinking about you. Scroll through your messages to see what times they texted you. If you see that they sent you a message in the morning, a few in the afternoon, some after dinner, and one before you went to bed, it might mean you're on their mind a lot!^{[2]
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Expert Source

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 11 June 2021.}
- These don't have to be super flirty texts or serious conversations. Even just a quick text to check in shows that they care about what you're up to or how you're doing.
- The texts might also show that they're paying attention to you. For instance, you might get a message like, "You slayed it at the game tonight. Maybe you could teach me a few tips?"
- They may be into you if you can tell you're always on their mind. They might text you during the day to ask how a meeting or test went, for instance.

3

Quick replies

Quick replies are a good sign that they're into you. Did you just get a notification even though you just texted them? If this keeps happening, they're probably waiting by their phone and focusing on your conversation. This is a great sign that they want to talk with you.^{[3]
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- It doesn't matter what you're texting about—the point is they want to keep the conversation going, which is why they're texting back so quickly.^{[4]
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  Expert Source
  
  Mark Rosenfeld
  Dating & Relationship Coach
  Expert Interview. 11 June 2021.}
- A lot of times, these quick replies can be part of a debate or conversation about things you like. They might text, "Favorite band?" Once you reply, they may quickly ask, "Pineapple on pizza. Yes or no?" And so on.
- It could just mean they're fast at replying in general.

4

Flirty emojis

Look for hearts, smiley faces, or kiss emojis in their messages. Some people love to use emojis when they communicate! Read through your messages from the person and watch for some of the more playful, flirty ones like:^{[5]
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- The winking face
- The smirking face
- The face blowing a kiss
- The heart eyes

5

Invitations

They'll ask you to come because they want to spend time with you! They might ask you directly to hang out or they may just suggest that you show up to something they're going to. Either way, it means they want to be around you.^{[6]
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- For instance, they may text, "I'm at the party. Why aren't you here?!" or, "Hey, I'm meeting up with some friends tonight at the coffee shop. Want to join?"
- This might be tied to checking in on you. You might get a text like, "Missed you at work today! You alright? Want to meet up later?"

6

Compliments

If they're into you, they'll tell you things they like about you. They may text to say how great you looked today or to compliment you on something you did. For instance, you might get, "That color green looks amazing on you," or, "Ugh, I'm trying to work, but I can't stop thinking about how you killed it during the game."^{[7]
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- Appreciate a direct compliment for what it is. The person is literally saying that they like you!
- They might be specific, too. For instance, you may get a text like, "I was super impressed by your answer in English class today. I never thought about the book that way."

7

Nicknames

Tailored nicknames suggest closeness or intimacy. You're not going to have an adorable nickname for someone you don't really like, right? If they're crushing on you, they probably won't drop a heavy term of endearment like "Darling" but they may use more subtle or personalized ones.^{[8]
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- For example, if they're into you, they might use a custom nickname like "Blue Eyes," 'Mr. Nice Guy."

8

Recommendations

They probably like you if they're looking for your advice. This shows that they value your opinions. For instance, they might text, "Need some new bands. Thoughts?" or "I loved the last show you recommended. Got any more?" They may even ask for your input on deeper topics like how to handle family drama or what you think about a current event.^{[9]
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- Sure, lots of people may ask for your opinion, but remember, if they like you, they're probably doing a lot of these things or frequently asking for your advice. They may simply be looking for a reason to talk to you.
- They may give you recommendations, too! For example, they could text, "You've got to read Smith's new book. I know you would love it."

9

Unique behavior

Get an idea of how they text other people if you're really not sure. You may still be confused even after reading between the lines, and that's okay! If you have friends in common who can keep a secret, ask to read the person's texts to them. This gives you an idea of how they communicate. Are they flirty with others? Do they use lots of emojis? How often do they text?^{[10]
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- For example, you might learn that the person doesn't actually text others very often and, when they do, it's fairly straightforward. This may mean that, if they're texting you a lot throughout the day and being really expressive, they're probably into you.
- Pay attention to when they're texting other people. If they're texting you late night because they can't sleep, it's probably because they want to build a connection with you.

10

Date acceptance

Text them a short invite to hang out together. This is one of the best ways to figure out if they like you. If they're interested in you, they'll most likely say yes! If they're not into you, they may ignore the message or give you an excuse. Either way, you'll have a much better idea of how they feel about you.^{[11]
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- Try sending a text like, "Hey let's grab a drink this Thursday. 8pm?" Keep in mind that if they like you but they can't meet up at that time, they might just suggest a time that works for them. If they don't suggest another time, you can totally wait a few days and try again.

Expert Q&A

Question

How do you hint at liking someone through text?

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Mark Rosenfeld is a Dating and Relationship Coach for women and founded Make Him Yours in 2015. Mark specializes in helping people find, attract, and keep extraordinary relationships. He has been featured in Style Magazine, Thought Catalog, Elite Daily, News.com.au, and The Good Men Project. Mark’s dating videos have received over 60 million views, and his book “Make Him Yours – Beating the Odds of Modern Dating” was a best-seller on Amazon on its release.

Mark Rosenfeld

Dating & Relationship Coach

Expert Answer

It's really more about the energy you're putting out than the specific words that you're sharing. Aim to reply quickly, be enthusiastic, and let the conversation develop organically. If there's any mutual interest there, you should feel it and they will too.