How to Be a Responsible Teen

Co-authored by Kirsten Parker, MFA and Jessica Gibson

Last Updated: December 29, 2022 References Approved

Being a teenager can be hard at times—between parental expectations, school work, and relationships with your friends, you might feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders. Instead of seeing these as stressors, consider all the opportunities you have! As a teen, you have lots of experiences and choices that let you prove how responsible you are.

1

Keep your room clean and organized.

Take care of your things and clean up after yourself. If your parents are still picking up after you or cleaning your room, they probably don't think you can handle other obligations like having a job or looking after a car. Prove that you can look after your things by organizing your room and keeping it tidy. Your parents will probably be impressed and grateful that you're caring for your belongings.^{[1]
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- Don't forget that showing responsibility also means respecting other people's things. If you've got siblings, always ask before you want to borrow something and take really good care of it if you do.

2

Help out around your home.

Contribute without being asked to demonstrate responsibility. If your parents have to nag you to do chores, they might think you're not ready for more independence. To earn their respect, find ways to help out without being asked. You might not think they'll notice, but over time, they'll realize that you're contributing. You can also ask them for things you can do that will show you're responsible.^{[2]
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- For example, if you know the trash always has to go to the curb on Tuesdays, move it out there the night before without being told. Try to do things that will help your parents and family out.

3

Work toward good grades.

Make an effort to study and turn in your homework. Yes, homework can be a hassle, but doing it will help you stay on track in class. Going to your classes and learning the material is one of the best ways to prove you're responsible—after all, good grades show that you're attending class, staying engaged, doing homework, and taking exams. This might seem like a lot of pressure, but remember that your teachers and counselors want you to succeed!
- If you're struggling with schoolwork, reach out to your teacher or counselor for help. You might need to work on your time management skills to fit in studying time with extracurricular activities and a part-time job, for instance.

4

Get a part-time or summer job.

You'll earn skills, experience, and money while proving responsibility. Your first job is a huge milestone! It shows that you can manage your time, take on work responsibilities, and that you're challenging yourself. During the school year, try not to work more than 10-15 hours a week so you still have time for homework or extracurriculars. You may want to work more during the summer if you're saving up or just have more time.^{[3]
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- Getting a job in high school also gives you valuable work experience. You can put this on a resume and learn about what kind of jobs you like.

5

Avoid drugs and alcohol.

These are risky activities that show poor judgment and can lead to addiction. You'll prove that you're a really responsible teen if you turn down drugs and alcohol.^{[4]
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Mayo Clinic
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Go to source} Unfortunately, you might find yourself in a situation where someone's really pushing it on you. If you can't avoid the person, here are a few ways you can turn them down:^{[5]
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- Let them know you're the designated driver and that you need to be sober.
- Explain that you don't use drugs or alcohol because you're on a sports team or have to work later, for instance.
- Bring your own non-alcoholic drink and let them know you're fine.
- Tell them your parents will be checking on you when you get home.
- Be clear that you don't use drugs or alcohol.

6

Protect yourself and your online identity.

Keep yourself safe and don't put yourself in risky situations. You might have rules that you're expected to follow—a curfew, rules about when you're allowed to drive, or places you can go with friends, for instance.^{[6]
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Mayo Clinic
Educational website from one of the world's leading hospitals
Go to source} Your parents probably have these rules to keep you safe! Keep your personal safety in mind when you're going places or meeting up with friends and don't let your guard down when you're online—be cautious about sharing personal information and change your profile settings to private.^{[7]
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- It's almost impossible to remove something from the internet, so think twice before you post something and never share things that could compromise or embarrass you.

7

Think before you act.

Consider the consequences before you do or say something you might regret. It's really easy to respond quickly at the moment and say or do something you regret, especially if you're arguing with friends or your family. If you start getting angry, take a few seconds to think about why you're upset and ways you could react. Consider the consequences of each reaction before you decide.^{[8]
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- For example, if your parent tells you that you can't go over to a friend's house, you might finish chores and then ask again instead of throwing a fit or getting into an argument with them.
- It's okay to be upset! However, if you don't think can react without getting angry and saying something you regret, give yourself some space to process things. Then, once you've cooled off, go back and talk with the person.

8

Have an open line of communication with your parents.

When you're a teenager, it can feel hard to talk, but make it a priority. You don't have to be best friends, but it's important to let them know what's going on in your life and how you're doing. Your parents will appreciate you letting them be involved in your life.^{[9]
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- If you get in the habit of just checking in with your parents about everyday things, it will be easier to have more serious conversations later on.
- Don't forget to ask about how things are going with your parents and take the time to listen. This shows them that you're considerate and growing up.

9

Discuss responsibilities and privileges.

Have a talk if you think you deserve more independence. It can be hard for parents to step back and give their teenagers more freedom, but if you feel like you deserve more privileges, sit down with them to talk about it. Be respectful and tell them what responsible things you've done to earn more freedom.^{[10]
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- For example, you might say, "I've raised my grades in two of my classes and I worked all summer. I think I'm responsible enough to have a later curfew. What do you think?"
- Don't demand more privileges or freedoms just because it's what your friends have. Remember, you've got to show your parents that you've earned their respect.

10

Practice good hygiene.

Bathe and wash your hair regularly so you're clean and smell nice. When you go through puberty, you might notice your hair becomes oilier, your skin is prone to breakouts, and your sweat has a stronger odor. This just means that you should wash your face daily, shower or bathe frequently, and wash your hair often.^{[11]
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- It's probably a good idea to start using deodorant which can keep you smelling fresh throughout the day, especially if you exercise.
- If you have acne, you may want to start a simple skincare regimen to manage oil and treat blemishes. Wash your skin twice a day with an oil-free cleanser and keep it moisturized. Pick up a few acne spot treatments that contain benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid to treat annoying pimples.
- Wear clean clothes and to show you're really responsible, wash your dirty clothes.

11

Take care of your own health.

Make your own doctor and dentist appointments to get regular care. Show your parents that you're growing up and taking steps to look after yourself. To show you're responsible, talk with your parents about scheduling your own doctor and dentist appointments.^{[12]
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- If you need to get a ride from your parent, check the appointment with them before you book so you know they can drive you.
- Health care can be confusing! If you have questions about medical care or insurance, ask your parent to help clear things up. This shows your guardian that you're serious about managing your health.

Expert Q&A
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Question

What's a good first step?

Rachel Clissold
Certified Life Coach
Rachel Clissold is a Life Coach and Consultant in Sydney, Australia. With over six years of coaching experience and over 17 years of corporate training, Rachel specializes in helping business leaders move through internal roadblocks, gain more freedom and clarity, and optimize their company’s efficiency and productivity. Rachel uses a wide range of techniques including coaching, intuitive guidance, neuro-linguistic programming, and holistic biohacking to help clients overcome fear, break through limitations, and bring their epic visions to life. Rachel is an acclaimed Reiki Master Practitioner, Qualified practitioner in NLP, EFT, Hypnosis & Past Life Regression. She has created events with up to 500 people around Australia, United Kingdom, Bali, and Costa Rica.

Rachel Clissold

Certified Life Coach

Expert Answer

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Start with acceptance. Just acknowledge that you're in charge of your personal behavior. Once you internalize that, it's a lot easier to start being responsible.
Question

Is feeling bad about my mistakes going to help me be more responsible?

Rachel Clissold
Certified Life Coach
Rachel Clissold is a Life Coach and Consultant in Sydney, Australia. With over six years of coaching experience and over 17 years of corporate training, Rachel specializes in helping business leaders move through internal roadblocks, gain more freedom and clarity, and optimize their company’s efficiency and productivity. Rachel uses a wide range of techniques including coaching, intuitive guidance, neuro-linguistic programming, and holistic biohacking to help clients overcome fear, break through limitations, and bring their epic visions to life. Rachel is an acclaimed Reiki Master Practitioner, Qualified practitioner in NLP, EFT, Hypnosis & Past Life Regression. She has created events with up to 500 people around Australia, United Kingdom, Bali, and Costa Rica.

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Certified Life Coach

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Not necessarily. Don't focus so much on judging the behavior. Try to show yourself a little compassion. If you make a mistake, just own it and forget about feeling bad about yourself.
Question

What does it really mean to be responsible?

Rachel Clissold
Certified Life Coach
Rachel Clissold is a Life Coach and Consultant in Sydney, Australia. With over six years of coaching experience and over 17 years of corporate training, Rachel specializes in helping business leaders move through internal roadblocks, gain more freedom and clarity, and optimize their company’s efficiency and productivity. Rachel uses a wide range of techniques including coaching, intuitive guidance, neuro-linguistic programming, and holistic biohacking to help clients overcome fear, break through limitations, and bring their epic visions to life. Rachel is an acclaimed Reiki Master Practitioner, Qualified practitioner in NLP, EFT, Hypnosis & Past Life Regression. She has created events with up to 500 people around Australia, United Kingdom, Bali, and Costa Rica.

Rachel Clissold

Certified Life Coach

Expert Answer

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It just means that you take ownership over yourself. You don't blame other people or outside influences when you make a mistake or do something wrong.