How to Get a Man's Attention

Co-authored by Lisa Shield

Last Updated: June 9, 2022 References

Getting a man's attention after he's already caught yours is often easier said than done. The simplest thing to do is to present yourself in a way that could catch any guy's eye. Once the man you're interested in looks your way, make it a point to maintain contact, then gradually ease into conversation.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Part One: Catch His Eye

1
Leave a little mystery when you dress. Your clothes should highlight your best features without putting everything on display. Showing just a hint of your feminine charm can tease him into imagining more.
- Revealing clothes are not necessarily the sexiest option. Instead, focus on playing up your best features. Pick out clothes that flatter your body type. The shape and material of the clothing should work with your natural curves, drawing attention to all the right places.
- Showing a little skin can also be effective, but the key idea is to leave more to the imagination than what you show. Pick out one revealing garment and balance it out with clothes that offer more coverage. For instance, wear a low-cut blouse with a knee-length or longer skirt. If you wear a blouse with a low back, make sure that your chest and legs are covered. When you opt for a mini skirt, keep your bust behind a blouse with a full neckline.
2
Wear red. Studies suggest that the color red can make women look more attractive to men more than any other color can.
- Some theories suggest that red is a naturally stimulating color. Others suggest that the link between the color red and sexuality is a learned behavior. Either way, multiple studies have suggested that red definitely has a positive effect when it comes to getting a man's attention.^{[1]
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- As with most things, less is more. Instead of dressing in bright red from head to toe, mix a little red into your outfit. Wear a red dress with black shoes or red shoes with a black dress, but avoid wearing a red dress with a red shoe.
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3
Amplify your pheromones with the right scent. A little perfume can go a long way, especially when you choose the right scent. Scent can trigger attraction on an instinctual level.
- Certain fragrances are believed to be more sensual than others. Traditionally, these scents include sandalwood, rose, ylang ylang, jasmine, and patchouli.^{[2]
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- Use a small dab or spray of perfume and only apply it to your pulse points. These points are located at your wrists, behind your ears, in the bend of your elbow, behind your knees, and on the inside of your ankles.
4
Relax your movements. Slow, smooth movements can make you appear more confident, more feminine, and more sensual. When you know he's looking in your direction, put a little extra effort into looking a little more graceful.
- Mind your posture and keep your back straight. Doing this demonstrates an appealing level of confidence while subtly flattering your chest.
- If you're at a club, party, or similar event, consider dancing at a time you know he can watch. Dancing can be a very sensual action. It also conveys confidence and a fun-loving nature.
- Try not to look jumpy or intimidated, even if you actually feel really nervous. You don't need to sit in the same spot the entire time, but maintain a relatively fixed position to demonstrate a calm, relaxed, and confident attitude.^{[3]
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Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Part Two: Make Contact

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Make eye contact. Once your eyes do meet his, you also need to show him a smile. Eye contact lets a man know that you're interested in him, but the smile is what lets him know that your interest is a positive one.^{[4]
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- To maximize the effect further, start by making a few sidelong glances in his direction.
- After a couple of these, look at him directly.
- As soon as he looks back, though, lower your eyes and show a coy, embarrassed smile.
- Slowly drag your eyes back up to his after a few moments. Continue to smile.
- Break eye contact and look away completely for a few minutes. Repeat the process again, as needed, to convey your interest.
2
Repeat after him. Mimic his body language. When he sips from his drink, sip from yours. If he tilts his head, tilt yours, too.
- Your behavior can relate to his without directly repeating it. For example, if he gets another drink and your glass is still full, hold up your glass in a quick "cheers" pose before taking a sip. Doing so acknowledges his action and clues him into the fact that you're paying attention.
3
Utilize the power of touch. When women are interested in a man, they naturally begin to play with their hair and touch themselves in other similar ways. You can use these types of actions to indirectly convey your interest to a man.
- Play with your hair. Twirl in between your fingers or run your fingers through it in an absent-minded manner.^{[5]
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- Run your fingers over your neck and shoulders.
- Wet or nibble on your lips, but try not to be obvious about it.
4
Challenge him. If the man you have your eye on still hasn't made a move, take a step back and give him the chance to chase after you. After making your interest obvious for a few minutes, stop and act like your interest is declining. Let a few more minutes pass by before turning his way again.
5
Give him an opportunity to approach you. Don't look busy. If a man thinks that you're waiting for someone or preoccupied by something else, he's less likely to look your way.
- In fact, it can be a good idea to look bored—when you're not looking at him, of course. Play around with a pen or glass. Keep your attention off your phone and out of a book. Look around idly and without focusing on much of anything.
- Some men might need a little more encouragement. Give him the opportunity to talk to you by positioning yourself closer and standing alone. Walk by him on your way to the restroom or bar. You can even lightly bump shoulders with him and apologize with a coy grin.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Part Three: Start Talking

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Compliment him.^{[6]
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Research source} You can compliment something about his appearance or you can wait until the conversation progresses and you're able to compliment something about his personality. Either way, honest flattery can make him feel good about himself and about the person offering it.
- Make sure that the compliments you offer are sincere.
- If you have a hard time verbalizing a convincing compliment, you can compliment him indirectly. A good way to do this is by laughing at his jokes.
- An even simpler way to compliment a man is to pay attention to what he says. Reply back with responses that make sense. Every so often, return to something he mentioned earlier in the conversation just to show that you found it interesting enough to remember.
2
Keep it light and keep it brief. Avoid topics that seem heavy, dull, or depressing. Stick with fairly lighthearted subjects, especially those that allow your comments to be easily summarized.
- A first meeting is not the time to tell him your life story, your past relationship woes, or your deepest fears. It's also not the right time to complain about work or your childhood.^{[7]
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- You can, however, mention your dreams or share humorous, short tales from your past or present. Choose topics that will leave you both in a good mood. Limit any stories you have to under a minute. If he wants to know more, he can ask.
- This does not, however, mean that you should try to act dumb. On the contrary, be as clever as the conversation allows. You don't need to be a brain surgeon, but you'll hold is attention much better if you can keep up with what he's saying instead of pretending to be oblivious.
3
Demonstrate "open" body language. Nonverbal communication is just as important as verbal communication. Situate yourself so that you appear open to the man's advances. If he thinks that you're shrinking back from him, his attention is likely to waver.
- Face him directly and occasionally lean forward in his direction.
- Keep your hands unclenched and your arms open. Avoid crossing your arms during the conversation.
- Find an excuse to touch him.^{[8]
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  Research source} You can "accidentally" touch his hand in the middle of the conversation or casually touch his shoulder when he makes an interesting remark.