How to Fill Out an RSVP Card

Last Updated: January 26, 2021

RSVP is an acronym for the phrase, “répondez, s’il vous plaît,” which means "please reply" in French. Typically used for more formal occasions, RSVP cards let the host know who is attending an event, which in turn helps them plan for it.^{[1]
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Expert Source

Christina Millikin
Professional Event Planner
Expert Interview. 11 February 2020.} If you receive an RSVP card in the mail, it's important that you fill it out properly and send it back in a timely manner. While some of the fields may seem confusing at first, filling out the card properly is actually a breeze.

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Responding to an RSVP

1
Check the envelope to see who was officially invited. Before you respond to the RSVP, check the inside or outside of the envelope to see who was invited to the event.^{[2]
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Expert Source

Christina Millikin
Professional Event Planner
Expert Interview. 11 February 2020.} If the host is okay with you bringing a guest, it will have a +1 on the card to indicate that you can bring another person. Decide whether you can attend before filling out the card.^{[3]
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- If the card says something like “The Thompson Family,” then your immediate family is invited to the event.
- If the card doesn’t have a +1 or +2 on the card, you should assume that only the people listed on the envelope are invited.
- If you are married with children and only you and your spouse are listed on the card, you shouldn’t assume that your kids are also invited to the event.
2
Write the full name of each attending guest after the "M" on the card. The M is the first letter in the title of your name. Writing your full names will let whoever is hosting the party that you're coming.^{[4]
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- For example, write something like “Mr. Joe Smith and Mrs. Jenny Smith.”
- Only write the name(s) of those attending the event.
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3
Write the number of guests attending in the accept or decline box. Writing the number of people attending will let the host know how many people will be coming to the event. If only 1 person was invited, you can fill in this field with a checkmark or an X.^{[5]
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- Letting them know who is coming in advance will allow them to properly prepare the right amount of food and allocate enough seating for everyone.
4
Indicate your food choices if there are options. Some RSVP cards will also have choices for food options at the event. If there is more than 1 person invited, put your initials next to your food choices. This will let the host know what each guest wants in terms of food.^{[6]
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5
Write a letter of congratulations if the card is empty. Some traditional RSVP cards will have a blank space instead of blank fields on the card. Write a short note on the RSVP card congratulating them on their wedding as well as who plans on attending.^{[7]
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- If you can attend, you can write something like, “Joe and Charlotte Shivers kindly accept the invitation to attend Marsha and Greg’s wedding on May 24th.”
- If you can’t attend you can write something like, “Unfortunately, because of a prior engagement, Joe and Charlotte Shivers are unable to attend Marsha and Greg’s wedding on May 24th. We wish you both the best and regret that we can’t make it.”

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Following Proper Etiquette

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Send the response card even if you don’t plan on attending. Even if everyone invited is declining, it’s important that you still fill out the RSVP card and send it out to the host.^{[8]
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Expert Source

Christina Millikin
Professional Event Planner
Expert Interview. 11 February 2020.} This will help them determine the number of seats they need and the amount of food necessary for the event.^{[9]
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- Many hosts will be busy with event preparations and won’t have the time to reach out to you personally if you don’t send back the RSVP.
- Some hosts will have a secondary list of guests they will invite if their first list of guests decline.
2
Mail the RSVP before the deadline. Most RSVP cards will include a response deadline. Try to respond a week or 2 before this deadline to give the host enough time to plan the event.^{[10]
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Expert Source

Christina Millikin
Professional Event Planner
Expert Interview. 11 February 2020.} If you can, send the card back as soon as you’re done filling it out.^{[11]
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- If the host has to wait to receive RSVP responses, it could push back their plans which makes hosting the party more difficult.
3
Write legibly. The host should be able to easily understand the writing on the RSVP card. If it’s a larger event, they could be going through hundreds of cards, so it’s helpful if yours is easy to understand and read.^{[12]
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- Using print rather than cursive may make it easier to read your handwriting.
4
Don’t respond by phone or email if a card was sent. It’s rude in most circumstances to respond via phone or email if an official RSVP was sent to you in the mail. The host likely spent money on having the cards designed, printed, and sent, so it’s polite to fill it out and send it back rather than responding using other means.^{[13]
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- The host is likely busy planning the event, so they may not have time to respond or talk to you over the phone or email.

Expert Q&A

Question

Do I need to ask guests to RSVP?

Christina Millikin
Founder & CEO, Glow Events
Christina Millikin is the Founder and former CEO of Glow Events, an event planning agency based in San Francisco, California. Glow Events is a boutique event planning firm specializing in full event production and creative design for corporate and social events. Christina has worked with clients such as Salesforce, Heroku, Okta, and Netflix. Glow Events' work has been featured in Martha Stewert Weddings, InStyle, and SanFrancisco Magazine. Christina is an advisor to the management team at Glow, as well as a business advisor for the Goldman Sachs 10,000 Small Businesses program, and she has a BS in Marketing from the University of Florida.

Christina Millikin

Founder & CEO, Glow Events

Expert Answer

I suggest getting RSVPs back one month before an event date, so that you have time to make adjustments based on the guest count. Sometimes when people wait until the last minute, they don't have enough time to get RSVPs. This can make your event planning unorganized, so send out RSVP requests sooner rather than later.
Question

Which way do I place the completed RSVP card into the envelope?

Michele

Top Answerer

Any way you want. What matters is that you responded.