10+ Ways to Tell if a Gemini Man Is Playing You

Co-authored by Tara Divina and Madeleine Criglow

Last Updated: September 20, 2021 References

It's hard not to fall for a Gemini man. As the most charming of the Zodiac, they have a way with words and seem to always know the perfect thing to do to get your attention. Sometimes, though, it can be a little difficult to know if they're being sincere. Are they in love or simply playing the game? This article is here to help you figure out how your Gemini guy really feels about you.

1

He doesn’t talk about his feelings.

If a Gemini man is committed, he'll open up to you. A Gemini that's playing you might only bring up surface-level topics, like the weather or sports. He may also change the subject when deeper subjects come up. Another indication would be if he seems more interested in your physical connection than your conversations.^{[1]
X
Research source}
- To see if he'd be interested in a deeper conversation, try to broach a deeper subject. Bring up his passions in life or goals for the future, and see how he responds.
- You might say, "You've got so many cool guitars! What do you like about playing music?" or "You seem super passionate about your job. Was it always something you wanted to do?" If he gives you a brief, vague answer instead of taking the time to really think about it, he might not be looking for a real connection.

2

He won't commit when you try to plan dates.

Do you go weeks without seeing him because of how busy he is? You may not be first on his priorities list if it's hard to fit into his schedule. Geminis do usually have a lot going on, but if they really like you, they'll make time for you.^{[2]
X
Research source
[v161190_b01]. 20 November 2019.} Notice if he's always got excuses for why he can't set a date.^{[3]
X
Research source}
- For example, he might refuse to give a definitive answer if you ask him to go to a concert with you in 3 weeks.
- He might say things like, "Things are just so crazy for me right now" or "I'd love to hang out, but work has been wild lately."

3

He takes forever to respond to texts.

Most people check their phones throughout the day. It's a sign he's not super serious about your relationship if he's always taking hours or even days to respond to your texts. When a Gemini man is serious about someone, they're usually very dependable and you'll hear from them often.^{[4]
X
Research source}
- It's also a sign if he doesn't put much effort into the conversation. If he responds with 1-word answers like "K" or "Haha," he may want to keep things casual.
- Everyone has different texting styles. If the Gemini guy you like is hard to reach over text but super reliable in person, texting may just not be his forte. Things like school and work schedules can also get in the way of texting back quickly.

4

He seems fickle and you can't get a read on him.

One minute he seems super into you, and the next he seems cold. Geminis are known as the twins of the Zodiac, which sometimes makes them seem like they have multiple personalities.^{[5]
X
Research source
[v161190_b01]. 20 November 2019.} When they're dating, this can look like constantly changing their mind about how they feel about a person, no matter how amazing they are.^{[6]
X
Research source}
- A Gemini guy who's playing you might laugh at your jokes one night and then seem bored and uninterested the next.
- If someone is fickle like this, it can really hurt. Try not to take it personally, as this is much more a reflection of the Gemini guy than you or any of your wonderful qualities.

5

He's often unreliable or flaky.

He cancels plans often or won’t follow through with his promises. You've finally set a date with the Gemini guy only for him to cancel at the last minute. If this happens on more than one occasion, he's probably not super invested in your relationship. He may also make promises, like offering to give you a ride to work, only to forget or tell you something came up.^{[7]
X
Research source}
- It's painful when someone treats you like this, but remember that it has way more to do with his shortcomings than you. Everyone is different, but sometimes Geminis struggle with maintaining commitments in favor of new endeavors.

6

He doesn't consider what you want out of the relationship.

If the relationship is all about meeting his needs, something is up. Is he always the one calling the shots, whether it be how often you hang out, what you do together, or what subjects you talk about? This Gemini guy might be playing you if you don't get a say in how the relationship progresses. He might be prioritizing his needs in an effort to keep things casual between you two.^{[8]
X
Research source}
- Geminis are capable of serious, monogamous relationships, but they're known for being rather picky about who they settle down with.

7

He doesn’t talk about your future plans as a couple.

Gemini men sometimes struggle with commitment. One big sign of this is refusing to talk about your future as a couple, like dates more than a few weeks in advance, your plans for the holidays, and even where your relationship is headed. Geminis like to live in the here and now, but when they're really invested in a relationship, they'll put their fears aside and commit.^{[9]
X
Research source}
- A noncommittal Gemini guy might avoid talking about things like being exclusive or moving in together.

8

He flirts with other people when you’re out together.

Gemini men are notorious for having a wandering eye. Though this may bother some more than others, this kind of behavior likely means he's not ready to commit to an exclusive arrangement. It might also be a warning sign he's seeing other people and pursuing other connections when you're not together.^{[10]
X
Research source}
- This might look like eyeing the barista while you're on a coffee date or talking up one of his "friends" when you're hanging out as a group.
- Geminis like to flirt and struggle with making up their mind. It can be hurtful to be on the opposite end of this, but try not to take what they're doing as a slight against you. It's much more related to their own relationship struggles.

9

He keeps his phone hidden.

This might mean he's texting or seeing other people. He doesn't have to share everything with you, but it's a warning sign if he's very guarded about his phone activity. He may be texting other people he's interested in or dating others on the side. Though this isn't necessarily a problem if you're both on the same page, he might be playing you if he's not being honest with you about it.^{[11]
X
Research source}
- If you're worried that he's been seeing other people, approach the subject directly and honestly in a respectful conversation.
- Say something like, "I know we've only been seeing each other for a few weeks, but I'd like to be on the same page about what we're doing. Are you seeing other people?"
- Avoid going through his phone without his permission. This will only add to the dishonesty and lack of trust in your relationship.

10

He hasn't introduced you to his friends or family.

Gemini men value their loved ones.^{[12]
X
Research source} If you've been dating for a few months and he's never introduced you to any of his friends and family, something might be up. He may be trying to keep the relationship casual.^{[13]
X
Research source}
- For example, does he neglect to invite you to parties with his friends? Do you mostly just hang out one-on-one? Does he avoid posting pictures of you together online?
- Keep in mind there may be other reasons you haven't met his friends and family yet! If you're comfortable, try bringing up the subject with him.

11

He won’t define the relationship.

A Gemini may be playing you if he won't make his intentions clear. Have you recently brought up the "What are we" conversation with no success? He may change the subject or tell you that he's not into labels. If that's the case, he's likely only looking for something casual.^{[14]
X
Research source}
- If you want something serious and he doesn't, you might consider walking away from the relationship. This can be really difficult, but it will make you feel much better in the long run. You deserve someone who's looking for the same thing as you!