How to Join a Fraternity

Last Updated: March 5, 2023

Joining a fraternity is a process that begins with researching the frats that you're interested in to find a right match and then attending rush events in order to make your bids. People decide to join fraternities for any number of reasons from networking and friendship to increased academic and community involvement. Discovering the right fraternity for you can be a hectic process, especially while narrowing down a long list of fraternities over the course of a rush week. However, by knowing what you want out of a fraternity and what to expect of rushing, you can go into rush week feeling prepared for the process.

Part 1

Part 1 of 2:

Choosing a Fraternity

1
Decide what type of fraternity you want to join. Fraternities may have similar goals of cultivating friendships and taking part in campus life, but no two fraternities approach these goals the same way. Each fraternity has a different charter, plans different events, and focuses on different aspects of campus life. With this in mind, you should meet with a wide array of fraternities as early as possible in your school’s recruitment process.
- You may find that some fraternities put too much emphasis on social events while you’re more interested in a fraternity that will be conducive to academic and leadership skills, or vice versa.
2
Attend events at several different fraternities. Each fraternity will hold several events early in the semester during what is most often referred to as “rush week” to drum up interest in potential recruits. Spend the first night or two of rush week sampling events at as many fraternities as possible to determine which one best suits your personality and goals for life on campus.
- In addition to simply meeting people, keep track of what life as part of each community will entail. The parties and free food of rush week aren’t necessarily emblematic of day-to-day life in the fraternity. Don’t be scared to ask a lot of questions about what the fraternity’s pledging process is like, the type of expenditure you can expect related to dues, the types of commitments you’re expected to make concerning study hours as well as campus and community events, and whether joining means living in the fraternity’s house or elsewhere.^{[1]
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- Not only does this assist you in deciding which frats truly interest you, but you’ll network with a ton of people in the process.
- You’ll likely find lists of these events wherever campus clubs and groups are allowed to advertise, including bulletin boards, sandwich boards, etc.
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3
Create a narrowed list. After getting a sense of a wide array of fraternities and what each one is about, create a short list of the ones that most appealed to you. Once you know which houses you’re interested in learning more about, you can schedule the rest of your rush week to attend more of their events.
4
Meet with as many brothers of each fraternity on your list as possible. This is dependent upon how many fraternities are on your list, but spend an extra day of rush week meeting with as many brothers of each fraternity on your list as possible. You may learn that your initial impression of a fraternity wasn’t quite what you thought or that while you like the focus of a certain fraternity, you’re unsure of how well you fit with the brothers with whom you will be in constant interaction.
- Remember during these interactions that it’s their job to sell their fraternity, and it’s your job to just be yourself. Be pleasant yet honest with all of the brothers with whom you meet. If you’re not interested in their fraternity, that’s perfectly okay. Pretending you’re interested in order to receive the most bids possible will ultimately waste your time and theirs.
- Continue narrowing down your list as you compile more information information on each, but don’t worry about narrowing the list down to a single fraternity. Much like applying to colleges in general, wide participation in a single fraternity’s rush week doesn’t guarantee they will extend a bid for you to join. By keeping your options spread three or so fraternities, you raise your changes of getting into one of them.
5
Manage your bids. Depending upon the demand of the fraternities on your list, they may hold offering bids to potential recruits until late in rush week, or they may start offering them early on if they find people they believe are a perfect fit. Don’t feel pressures to come back with a response immediately. In addition to accepting or declining a bid, most fraternities will allow you to place a hold on the bid while you continue weighting your options.
- Make sure you fully understand the specifics of putting a hold on your bid. You don’t want to miss a spot in the fraternity you ultimately choose because you responded too late.
6
Choose your fraternity. After spending time with a few different fraternities that you feel are the right fit, you’ll hopefully receive a bid from at least one. Take the proper amount of time to weigh your options and choose the one that most complements your personality, goals on campus, and expected level of interaction.
- When you accept a bid from a fraternity, they will then make it official by having you sign a “bid card,” though it may have a different name in your specific frat.

Part 2

Part 2 of 2:

Pledging a Fraternity

1
Know what to expect. Once you’ve accepted a bid from a fraternity, you still have to undergo the pledging process, which is essentially where you continue learning about the frat and pledge to uphold the traditions and expectations thereof. You can expect to dedicate a large portion of time organizing frat events, representing the frat at school-related events such as sports, and giving time to the frat’s chosen charitable organizations.
- Due to the highly controversial history and connotations of pledging, many fraternities have actually done away with the process. This means that while you will be expected to maintain a commitment to learning about the community and upholding its practices, you may not actually have to pledge.
2
Take a zero tolerance approach to hazing. While many college campuses and fraternity chapters have widely cracked down on the practice of hazing, it’s not unheard of. Generally speaking, fraternities feel the hazing process is a rite of passage proving your dedication and desire to belong. However, there’s a huge difference between showing your dedication and subjecting yourself to humiliating or potentially dangerous acts.
- If you ever feel as though you’re being harassed by the brothers of your fraternity as you pledge, then take it to someone higher up. If you feel the actions go beyond anything that the higher ranking brothers of the fraternity would allow, take it to them. If you don’t feel like you can take it to other frat brothers, then talk to someone at the student affairs office at your college.^{[2]
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  Research source} The student affairs office will allow you to remain anonymous if you so choose. They will then take up the issue with the fraternity and even law enforcement if necessary.^{[3]
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  Research source} Never feel as though you’re snitching or simply can’t hack it in the face of unacceptable behavior.
- You’ll have to decide for yourself what you find an acceptable level of razzing from the fraternity brothers as you earn your place in the organization as a pledge, but never allow them to cross a line with which you aren’t comfortable.
3
Make the time commitment. Though not hazing, pledging is still an intensive process of continuous learning and integration into fraternity life. You can expect to spend roughly six to twelve weeks as a pledge depending on your fraternity.^{[4]
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4
Engage in philanthropic practices. During your time as a pledge, the fraternity will expect you to sample the wide range of activities in which they take part. This usually includes helping one of the philanthropic organizations the fraternity supports.^{[5]
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Research source} This can range from helping to organize a fundraiser to donating time to the organization.
5
Keep up with your academics. Many fraternities require keeping your GPA above a certain threshold in order to maintain your involvement.^{[6]
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Research source} Develop good study habits early on, so that you’re never stuck in a bad situation when grades roll around. While pledging, the frat will likely advise you to familiarize yourself with study halls and other academic support that they offer.
6
Participate in social events. In addition to philanthropic and academic responsibilities, fraternities will also expect you to maintain a level of participation with social events. Fraternities want to be well represented at campus functions, athletic events, and other social venues, and pledges may be expected to engage in quite a few of these events.^{[7]
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Research source} Pledges may even be tasked with helping do the legwork in getting the word out about the fraternity’s events. Above all, prepare to be active.

Community Q&A

Question

Can I play sports and live in a frat house?

Community Answer

Of course! In fact, you could get your fraternity brothers to start an intramural team, which is a great way to get to know them even better.
Question

Can I join a frat if I'm not of a binary gender?

Community Answer

Non-binary genders are a recent thing awareness-wise. If it's a typical fraternity, probably not. If it's a fraternity based on academics (like a business fraternity), people of all genders can join.

Warnings

Hazing is never an acceptable practice from any fraternity no matter what they call it. If you ever feel uncomfortable with something you’re asked to do or harassed by a brother of the fraternity, then take the issue to someone higher up in the organization immediately.

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