This article was co-authored by Tami Claytor and by wikiHow staff writer, Jessica Gibson. Tami Claytor is an Etiquette Coach, Image Consultant, and the Owner of Always Appropriate Image and Etiquette Consulting in New York, New York. With over 20 years of experience, Tami specializes in teaching etiquette classes to individuals, students, companies, and community organizations. Tami has spent decades studying cultures through her extensive travels across five continents and has created cultural diversity workshops to promote social justice and cross-cultural awareness. She holds a BA in Economics with a concentration in International Relations from Clark University. Tami studied at the Ophelia DeVore School of Charm and the Fashion Institute of Technology, where she earned her Image Consultant Certification.
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It's easy to assume that you already know how to hold a teacup, but there are actually subtle rules of etiquette you need to follow. Should you hold your pinky out when you're holding a teacup? How do you hold a teacup like a royal? Don't worry—we've put together some tips to help you hold a teacup the proper way so you can avoid a teacup faux pas.
Steps
Positioning Your Fingers on the Teacup
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1Place your thumb and forefinger between the handle. Pinch your thumb and forefinger together as they meet near the top of the teacup's handle. Avoid hooking your forefinger under the handle since you'll use other fingers to support the weight of the cup.[1] [2]
- Since Chinese teacups generally don't have handles, wrap your hand around the teacup and support the bottom of the cup with your other hand.
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2Support the bottom of the handle with your middle finger. Prop your middle finger under the bottom of the handle, so it carries the weight of the teacup. Your thumb and forefinger should still be positioned near the top of the handle.
- At this point, the teacup should still be on its saucer.
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3Keep your ring and pinky fingers tucked in. Although you've probably seen people extend their pinky fingers while drinking tea, it's actually considered rude. Instead of sticking the pinky finger out, keep it curled in along with your ring finger.[3] [4]
Did You Know? It used to be thought that well-bred people ate daintily with just 3 fingers and that common people grasped food with all fingers. This gave way to the outdated idea that sticking your pinky finger out showed you were cultured.
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4Hold the saucer in your other hand if you're not sitting at a table. If you're taking tea at a function where everyone is standing, keep the teacup on a saucer that you hold with your non-dominant hand. Keep the saucer slightly above waist level and lift the teacup up towards your mouth when you're ready to drink.
- Avoid bending over and down to sip the tea while it's still on the saucer.
- If you're having tea at a table, leave the saucer on the table so it's directly in front of you. Then pick up the teacup when you'd like to sip and set it back down on the saucer quietly.
Practicing Proper Teacup Etiquette
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1Adjust the flavor with milk or tea if you like. Once the hostess has poured tea into your teacup, decide if you'd like to add sugar or milk. Add sugar according to your taste and pour in milk.
- If you'd like to add a squeeze of lemon, put it in after the sugar. Remember to never add lemon if you're also pouring in milk since it will cause the milk to curdle.
Did You Know? Cream is usually reserved for coffee since it's too heavy to dissolve well in tea.
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2Stir the tea delicately with a spoon. Take your teaspoon and combine the milk or sugar with the tea by moving the spoon back and forth in the tea. While you've probably seen people swirl the spoon in a circular motion, this can actually prevent sugar from dissolving and cause tea to splash over the sides of the teacup.[5]
- There shouldn't be any sound as you stir the tea and the spoon shouldn't hit the sides of the teacup.
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3Place the spoon behind the teacup on the saucer. After you've stirred the tea, lift the teaspoon up so any tea drips back into the teacup. There's no need to tap or hit the spoon against the side of the teacup. Set the teaspoon behind the teacup on your saucer.[6]
- Never lick the teaspoon before setting it down your the saucer. This is considered to be bad manners.
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4Raise the cup to your mouth and take a small sip. Pick up your teacup and bring to your lips. Since the tea will be hot, take a little sip so you don't burn your mouth. If the tea is too hot to comfortably drink, set it down on the saucer and wait a minute to take another sip.[7]
- It's considered rude to blow the tea to cool it off, so just wait for the tea to cool on its own.
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5Look into your cup as you drink and set the teacup down on its saucer. When the tea is at a comfortable temperature and you're ready to drink, look into the tea in your cup while you sip. Avoid drinking and looking over the cup. Once you're finished sipping, quietly place the teacup back down on the saucer.
- If you're taking tea in a formal setting, limit the amount of tea you drink to 2 cups.
Expert Q&A
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QuestionWhich hand should I use?Tami ClaytorTami Claytor is an Etiquette Coach, Image Consultant, and the Owner of Always Appropriate Image and Etiquette Consulting in New York, New York. With over 20 years of experience, Tami specializes in teaching etiquette classes to individuals, students, companies, and community organizations. Tami has spent decades studying cultures through her extensive travels across five continents and has created cultural diversity workshops to promote social justice and cross-cultural awareness. She holds a BA in Economics with a concentration in International Relations from Clark University. Tami studied at the Ophelia DeVore School of Charm and the Fashion Institute of Technology, where she earned her Image Consultant Certification.
Etiquette Coach
References
- ↑ https://youtu.be/OqBI5w3z1E0?t=25
- ↑ Tami Claytor. Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.
- ↑ https://www.vogue.com/article/english-teatime-etiquette-how-to
- ↑ Tami Claytor. Etiquette Coach. Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.
- ↑ https://youtu.be/iXQKtdHNNbQ?t=43
- ↑ https://youtu.be/2TD89DfyAQQ?t=80
- ↑ https://youtu.be/2TD89DfyAQQ?t=106