How to Get Your Best Friend to Stop Teasing You

Tell your friend about your feelings. Your friend may not realize that his or her teasing is making you feel badly or hurting your feelings. Letting your friend know how his or her teasing affects you may stop it.^[4]

• Let your friend calmly, nicely, and confidently know that it makes you feel bad when he or she teases you. It’s important to be as nice as possible so that you don’t hurt your friend’s feelings. You may even want to say something when it’s just the two of you. You could say, “Alex, you’re my best friend and it really hurts my feelings when you tease me” or “Taylor, when you called me “bad breath Seth” I felt really sad.”
• Allow your friend to respond to what you say. He or she may apologize to you or could get mad. If this happens, just walk away to let your friend know you don’t want to fight.

Ask your friend to stop teasing you. Letting your friend know how the teasing makes you feel is a good way to get your friend’s attention. You should also clearly ask your friend to stop teasing you, especially if it’s hurtful.^[5]

• Say, “Thanks so much for listening to my feelings, Sam. I’ve been feeling badly lately. Could you please stop teasing me?” or “It would be really helpful if you didn’t tease me anymore.”^[6]
• Consider assuring your friend that you won’t tease him or her anymore, either. Not having any teasing in your friend may keep either of you from hurting each other.

Use body language when your friend teases you. It can be tempting to argue or stick out your tongue if your friend is teasing you. This might not stop him or her from teasing you. Instead, use your body language to signal to your friend that you don’t like the teasing. This can be a silent and very effective way to tell your friend—and others—that you don’t like what he or she is saying.^[7] You can use the following body language to show your friend that you are not happy about the teasing:

• Crossing your arms
• Looking directly at him or her and not saying anything
• Knitting or turning down your eyebrows
• Angle your head downwards and rub your forehead
• Turning down your mouth or frowning

Ignore the teasing. Another way to get a friend to stop teasing you is to simply walk away. While this might seem like you’re running away, it’s actually a powerful way to say, “I don’t care” and “you can’t hurt me.” Ignoring your friend’s comments can make you feel better and make your friend realize that he or she needs to stop.

• Pretend that you don’t hear your friend’s teasing. You can also look directly at your friend when she or he teases you and simply not say anything back.^[8] Think about having a protective bubble around you that words can’t get through. This could help you ignore the teasing, too.^[9]
• Walk away calmly from the situation. Don’t respond or react in an aggressive way, which could make the teasing worse. Simply turn around and walk to another place. If your friend chases behind you, it may make him or her look badly. He or she may even want to apologize to you.

Give your friend a dose of the same medication. Sometimes your friend might not get the clue that his or her teasing really hurts you. Calmly teasing back may send the message that he or she needs to stop.^[10]

• Keep your response as calm and “nice” as possible. For example, you could say, “Wow, you noticed my braces! You’re a real genius, Logan.” You could also say, “I thought that the bad smell was your bad breath bouncing off of my face.”
• Avoid saying about the person’s appearance or family, even if they tease you for this. In these cases, you could say, “If only we were all gorgeous like you, Jaden.”

Let another friend know. If your friend continues to tease you or he or she is teasing another friend, too, then let that person know about your experience. Tell a friend about how your feelings and that the teasing that is happening. Your friend may offer you support when the friend teases you or can help you feel better by assuring you that you’re a great person and doing nothing wrong.^[11]

• Ask your other friend if you can talk to him or her in private. Remember to stay calm and as to the point as possible so you don’t appear mean or like you’re trying to hurt the friend who is teasing you.
• Say, “Bailey, can we talk? Cameron has been teasing me a lot and it hurts my feelings. I noticed that she does the same thing to you, too. Does it make you feel bad?” You can also say, “Avery, can I talk to you? Sydney has been teasing me a lot and I don’t know what to do about it. I’ve asked him to stop and he won’t. He’s started to tease me in front of all of our friends and I feel really left out.”

Tell an adult about the teasing. If the teasing doesn’t stop or gets worse, let an adult know about it. You could tell your parents, a teacher, or a counselor about your friend’s teasing. This may get the friend to stop, especially if he or she fears getting punished by his or her parents.^[12]

• Be honest with the adult you are telling about the teasing. Tell the person what’s been going on and how it makes you feel. Answer any questions the adult asks you about the teasing.
• Remember that you’ve done nothing wrong and are great just the way you are. Telling an adult can help you feel better and find a positive way to stop the teasing.