How to Stop an Erection: Ending & Hiding Unexpected Arousal

Expert tips for handling surprise erections & teaching boys about their changing bodies

Co-authored by Michael Dickerson, PsyD and Dan Hickey

Last Updated: December 26, 2022 References Approved

Stopping Erections

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Hiding Erections

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Helping Children Understand Erections

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Tips

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Warnings

Few things feel as awkward as an unexpected erection in public or during an inopportune moment, like a serious conversation or a doctor’s appointment. Whether you’re on a date, at work, or in school, an erection can make you feel self-conscious and wondering “How do I make this go away!?” Even though erections are natural and pass with time, there are a lot of tricks you can try to get rid of or hide one when you can’t find any privacy. In this article, we’ll show you the best ways to stop an erection (and hide it when you can’t), plus show you how to explain erections to boys and young men who may not understand what’s happening to their bodies. Relax and don’t stress—chances are you’re the only one who even notices!

Things You Should Know

Get rid of an erection by distracting yourself, going for a walk or flexing a muscle, meditating, or trying to pee.
Hide erections by changing how you’re sitting, covering up with a book or tied sweatshirt, putting your hands in your pockets, or tucking it into your waistband.
Let boys experiencing puberty know that erections are normal and healthy, then give them tips to hide erections in public (like tying a sweatshirt around their waist).

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Stopping Erections

1
Distract yourself with conversation, TV, or something in the room. Strike up a conversation about finance, politics, a hobby, or anything that will divert your attention from your erection or any arousing thoughts. Focus on a TV or movie playing in the background or any interesting object or decoration around you.^{[1]
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- If you can’t find something nearby to focus on, occupy your mind with thoughts about upcoming deadlines, funny memories, or something just plain weird.
2
Flex a muscle or go for a walk to get your blood pumping elsewhere. Find an excuse to step outside and go for a short walk around the block (“I forgot my wallet in the car!”). When you start moving around, blood will flow to other parts of your body and end your erection.^{[2]
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- If you can’t get away, flex any muscle for about 30 seconds. This will redirect blood to your muscle and distract you at the same time.^{[3]
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- Any light exercise or activity that requires movement will help shrink an unwanted erection.
3
Head to the nearest restroom and try to urinate. Excuse yourself to go to the bathroom (in public or private) or use another excuse to get away, like taking a phone call.^{[4]
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Research source} It can be uncomfortable, but try to pee with your erection—by the time you’re done, it will be lessened or gone completely.^{[5]
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- Depending on the situation, excuse yourself and say that something urgent has come up so you can get away.
- If you can’t pee, try splashing cold water on your face, doing some jumping jacks, or focusing on unarousing thoughts.
4
Meditate or try breathing exercises to ground and relax yourself. Sneak to a quiet place where you can get some privacy, like a bathroom, bedroom, or empty meeting room. Center your thoughts on your breathing or a distracting thought, like all of the errands you have to run later in the day, to help naturally end your erection faster.^{[6]
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- Try this breathing exercise: Inhale for 4 counts, hold your breath for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts, then hold your breath again for 4 counts. Repeat.^{[7]
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- Meditation and breathing calm your nerves so you won’t fixate on your erection. They also lower your blood pressure, making it harder to maintain.
5
Hold your breath for as long as you can. Take a deep breath discreetly and hold it for at least around 30 seconds. As your blood deoxygenates, your body will briefly enter survival mode and redirect blood flow to your vital organs. This means your erection will begin to deflate.^{[8]
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- Take a breath when you can’t hold it in anymore, and try repeating this move if the erection doesn’t start subsiding after the first try.
- Allow your mind to focus on your breath and the sensation of holding it instead of on your erection.
6
Jump in a cold shower to shock your circulatory system. This option isn’t practical if you’re out on a date or running an errand, but if you’re home, crank your shower handle to “C” and step in for a few moments. The cold water forces your body to send blood to your core and vital organs, meaning your erection will dwindle shortly.^{[9]
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- If you’re out, look for a cold object you can discreetly hold to your erection. For example, try holding a cold drink in your lap if you’re sitting down.
- If you hate cold showers, try the opposite and take a warm bath. The warm waters relaxes your entire body, including a tense erection.^{[10]
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- The sensation of cold water on your bare skin also occupies your mind and keeps you from thinking about arousing thoughts, too.
7
See a doctor ASAP if your erection lasts more than 2-4 hours. An uncontrollable or painful erection that won’t go down is called priapism and may or may not be caused by sexual arousal. See a doctor right away—untreated priapism can cause permanent damage to your penis from blood vessels that are inflated for too long.^{[11]
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- Priapism can be a side effect of medications for erectile dysfunction or other medications, blood disorders, drug use, or injury.
- A doctor will have to administer medication or physically drain blood from the penis if the erection won’t go down naturally.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Hiding Erections

1
Reposition yourself to adjust your genitals and shield an erection. Shift your legs or hips to “adjust yourself” discreetly so your erection or testicles are positioned normally in your trousers (the feeling of having it all “bunched up” might trigger an erection). Try this sitting or standing.^{[12]
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- If you’re seated, try crossing your legs or bringing your knees up to your chest to hide your erection until it passes.
- If you’re standing, try to face people head on rather than from the side (it makes any bulges in your pants look less obvious).
2
Put your hands in your pockets to make the erection less obvious. Slide one or both hands into your pockets and discreetly hold the tip of your erection close to your body until it passes (just try not to accidentally stimulate yourself). Try pinching it or holding it at an uncomfortable angle to suppress it faster.^{[13]
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- Alternatively, keep both hands in your pockets to create more space in the front of your pants so your erection isn’t visibly pressing against them.
3
Cover up your crotch and wait it out. If you’re seated, try holding a book or laptop over your crotch or scooting your chair closer to a table to conceal your erection. If you’re standing, reposition a bag or hold your coat in front of you. This is the simplest, easiest way to cover up an intrusive erection without drawing attention to yourself.^{[14]
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- Use this trick if your pants don’t have pockets or there’s no way to reposition yourself discreetly.
4
Tuck your erection into your waistband until it passes. Move to a private space or turn away from the folks you’re with. Then, discreetly maneuver your erection through your pocket to flip it so the head of your penis is pointing upward. Your waistband will hold it flat against your body until it subsides.^{[15]
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- Make sure you’re wearing an opaque, long, not-too-tight shirt in case your erection protrudes far above your waistband.
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Take advantage of your outfit to cover up your erection. Put your hands in a hoodie pouch or the pockets of your jacket and hold them in front of you, or untuck a long shirt so it hangs over your crotch area. If you’ve got pleated pants on, put your hands in your pockets or sit down—the extra room in the front will help hide your erection.^{[16]
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- If you’re worried about unexpected erections, avoid tight pants (like stretchy jeans), since the rub can stimulate an erection and then make it more visible.
- Steer clear of super loose pants too, like sweats or gym shorts, since these give your erection too much freedom to “pitch a tent,” so to speak.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Helping Children Understand Erections

1
Let your son know that erections are normal. Explain how erections can happen for no particular reason, especially if he’s too young to understand sexual arousal or is just realizing he’s started puberty. Tell him that erections aren’t usually controllable and the best way to get rid of them is to let them pass with time. ^{[17]
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- Ask a doctor or healthcare provider to explain erections and puberty to your child if you’re uncomfortable having the conversation yourself.
- Every guy is different and there’s no “normal” number of erections to experience per day.
- As puberty progresses and a young man’s hormones stabilize, the frequency of unexpected erections will decrease.
2
Teach him to only handle or explore an erection in private. Emphasize that erections shouldn’t be played with or exposed in public if the child is too young to understand sexual behavior.^{[18]
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Research source} Tell him his penis needs to stay protected in his pants, just like how you wear gloves to protect your hands or sunglasses to protect your eyes.^{[19]
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- Focus on the non-sexual purpose of a penis (peeing) with young children and let them know that erections are just a natural thing that happens sometimes.
- A boy of any age can get an erection and it’s normal for a child to want to explore their body as they get older and approach or begin puberty.
3
Give your son tips for how to hide an erection at school or in public. A young man can feel embarrassed by an erection, so tell him to stay seated until it passes. If he has to stand or walk, have him cover his crotch with a book or his backpack or to tie a sweatshirt around his waist.^{[20]
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- Help him choose fitted but not very tight pants and underwear to help make unwanted erections less obvious.
- Remind him to focus on the lyrics to a song or poem to take his mind off the erection and help it pass faster.
- Adolescents of all genders struggle to deal with puberty and will appreciate your support or advice!
4
Discuss puberty before it happens so your child is mentally prepared. Tell them how they may experience erections more frequently, and explain other changes young men go through like growing body hair, voice changes, and growth spurts. Most importantly, let them know they can come to you with questions as they navigate this new phase of their lives.^{[21]
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- Remember, puberty is not a one-time conversation. Your son will likely need continued support or advice as he experiences new changes and feelings.
- Don’t wait for him to come to you with questions. He may feel too embarrassed to talk about puberty, especially if they don’t know it’s OK to ask questions.
- Boys usually start puberty between ages 10 and 15, and sometimes as early as 8 or 9 years old.

Warnings

Always consult a doctor if an erection is painful or lasts more than 2-4 hours, as the penis can be permanently damaged by untreated priapism.^{[23]
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