How to Be a Classy Guy

Co-authored by Tami Claytor

Last Updated: August 4, 2022

Behavior

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Etiquette

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Appearance

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Expert Q&A

If you're on a mission to become more sophisticated, it will mean paying more attention to your looks, attitude, and behavior. A classy guy is one who is polite, charming, neat, clean, and cares for others. Pick your wardrobe carefully, brush up on your manners, and treat others with respect. Do this, and you'll become the envy of others.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Behavior

1
Show self-confidence through body language. Classy guys are like the magnet in the room: everyone is drawn to them. This isn’t because they show off or go out of their way to draw attention to themselves. Rather, it's simply because of their self-confidence. Even if you feel shy, appearing confident will actually make you feel more self-assured over time. Try things like:^{[1]
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- Looking people in the eye when you talk to them.
- Shaking hands when you meet people.
- Standing in a “power pose” (legs slightly apart, hands on hips, arms bent out slightly at the elbows).
2
Be considerate of others. This is the key to being classy, and without this, you will easily be mistaken for a snob. Be particularly attentive to the needs of the elderly and remember that nobody is beneath your notice. Always be polite. Classy guys do not say anything hurtful or offensive to other people.
- If you have to confront someone or put them in their place, speak the truth as you see it, but in moderate language and without recourse to shouting. It is important to find the right time and place for such confrontations.
- If you want to be a classy guy, then you should treat waiters, strangers, friends of friends, or neighbors with the same level of respect you would give to your close friends.
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3
Compliment people around you. Look for ways to make others feel good about themselves, and they'll start to admire you for paying attention. It's easy to do this by dishing out compliments. Just keep them genuine!^{[2]
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- Try giving simple compliments to people you know, like “Hey Karl, that jacket looks great on you!”
- You can also practice by saying nice things to strangers, like "What a cute dog you have!"
- Make sure not to give compliments that might be misconstrued as creepy or focus too much on physical features. For instance, instead of saying something like "That dress really brings out your figure," try saying something like "You look so elegant today!"
4
Remember things that are important to other people. Make notes about birthdays, special things you know they like, and so on. People will consider you classy if you show attentiveness. Everyone loves to be appreciated!
- Make sure to congratulate people on their birthday and other important dates.
- Surprise people by remembering their likes: “Pam, I know you love chocolate eclairs, so I brought some in for the office this morning.”
- Ask people about things that are important to them: "Isaiah, you ran the 5k this weekend, right? How did it go?"
5
Give others a chance to talk. Classy guys will be charismatic, but not dominate conversations. Give others a chance to speak, and ask them questions to show that you care about what they say (“So you’re into action movies? Which ones are your favorites?”).
- As you listen to others talk, nod and use facial expressions to show you're listening.
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Start conversations in a classy way. Whether you're meeting someone for the first time, or starting up a conversation with someone you already know, take things slow. A classy guy will start by asking how the person is doing, then move on to natural topics of conversation.
- For instance, if you're at a wedding, start by asking the person next to you if they're enjoying themselves.
- Ask questions, like "So is this your first time in the area?" to show you are interested in the person.
- If the conversation progresses, try to find mutual interests. For instance, you could talk about an acquaintance you have in common, or about favorite movies, travel, school, etc.
- Avoid asking for someone's phone number or contact info right away. Wait until you've talked a bit, to make sure the person is interested.
7
Treat dates like royalty. If you’re taking someone out, make them feel special. Go out of your way to show you appreciate them, and let them know that you are someone they can respect and rely on. It’s not hard to do this! Good-old fashioned guidelines still apply:^{[3]
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- Call your dates, rather than just texting them.
- Be on time for dates. If there’s something causing you to run late, let them know.
- Don’t just meet up with your date and say “So what do you want to do?” Make a plan for the date.
- Don’t push your date into doing anything they don’t want to do.
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Be devoted to your significant other. If you're in a long-term relationship, there are ways to show your classiness there as well. Focus on making your partner feel special and loved.
- Make time to listen to your significant other. Ask them how their day was, for starters.
- Always remember big dates like birthdays and anniversaries. Try to do something special for them.
- Go for the little everyday gestures that mean a lot: write love notes, pick up their favorite dinner, surprise them with tickets to their favorite concert, etc.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Etiquette

1
Remember your basic manners. A classy guy is expected to be polite and well-behaved. If you remember to say “Please” and “Thank you,” you’ll be off to a great start. Aside from that, show consideration everyday by doing things like:^{[4]
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- Saying "excuse me" if you bump into someone.
- Letting others go first when you're waiting in lines, at elevators, etc.
- Not being overly loud when in public.
- Taking your hat off when you go indoors.
- Putting your phone down when you're in line to order something.
- Showing up on time.
- Not boasting or complaining about very personal issues on social media.
2
Practice a little courtesy. Looking out for others is another sign of a classy guy. Showing a little attentiveness to everyone -- regardless of their gender, age, race, etc. -- just beams class. Try things like:^{[5]
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- Holding doors for people.
- Offering to push elevator buttons, grab things from high shelves, etc.
- Giving up your seat on a bus or train for someone who looks like they need it.
3
Use table manners. For formal events and locations, there are elaborate rules about how to eat and behave at the table. Unless you’re going to one of these, you don’t have to obsess about the rules. Still, a few basic manners apply practically everywhere, like:^{[6]
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- Take your hat off when at the table.
- Wait for everyone to be seated and served before you start to eat.
- Don’t talk while chewing.
- Don’t lick your fingers.
- Avoid reaching over others plates to grab things.
- Put your phone away at the table.
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Stick to clean humor. Being classy does not mean you have to be stiff. Let your sense of humor show, and don't be afraid to laugh with other people. However, don't laugh at or tell crude, sexist, or offensive jokes.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Appearance

1
Wear clean, neat clothes. You don’t have to walk around in a three-piece suit everyday. Still, if your clothes are dirty or wrinkled, your look will tell the world “I don’t care about my appearance.”^{[7]
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Expert Source

Tami Claytor
Etiquette Coach
Expert Interview. 20 May 2021.}
- Go for quality over quantity. It’s better to have fewer clothes that fit right, look nice, and will last than to have a closet full of cheap clothes that will wear out fast.
- You can often find designer clothes at affordable prices by looking at outlets and factory stores.
- Shop online to get even better deals and sales.
- You don't have to completely re-do your wardrobe, but make sure anything you wear is clean and wrinkle-free.
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Dress to impress. There’s nothing wrong with wearing a t-shirt and jeans when you’re hanging around the house. Out in public, however, a classy guy is expected to wear something slightly more upscale. If you aren’t sure what to go for, stick to white and blue button-down shirts or polos and well-fitting slacks or khakis.
- You can even take everyday clothes and class them up. For instance, if you have a graphic tee you love to wear with jeans, throw on a simple blazer over it.
- Get a decent pair of semi-casual shoes to wear rather than sneakers or sandals.
3
Get a well-fitting suit for formal occasions. If you’re going to an event that is at all formal, you can’t go wrong with a suit. Buying a suit off the rack is just fine, as long as it fits well. Take it to an alteration shop if you need to make any adjustments.
- Stick to gray or dark blue suits for most occasions. Black suits are usually for very formal or solemn occasions. Brightly-colored suits should be avoided.
- Wear simple ties with your suit. Avoid obnoxious colors or prints.
4
Accessorize to complete your look. Things like a nice watch, a scarf, or a hat (something other than a baseball cap) will instantly signal your classiness. You don’t have to go overboard on these, either. With watches, for instance, just get a nice looking one with a metal or leather band. It does not need to be diamond-encrusted or solid platinum!
- Have fun with accessories, since they're a way to show your personal style while still looking classy. For instance, you could throw on a belt with a distinctive buckle, or wear fun socks to add a little flair.
- Try to dress appropriately for the occasion. For instance, don't wear sneakers to a formal event.^{[9]
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  Expert Source
  
  Tami Claytor
  Etiquette Coach
  Expert Interview. 20 May 2021.}

Expert Q&A

Question

How can I look more mature?

Tami Claytor
Etiquette Coach
Tami Claytor is an Etiquette Coach, Image Consultant, and the Owner of Always Appropriate Image and Etiquette Consulting in New York, New York. With over 20 years of experience, Tami specializes in teaching etiquette classes to individuals, students, companies, and community organizations. Tami has spent decades studying cultures through her extensive travels across five continents and has created cultural diversity workshops to promote social justice and cross-cultural awareness. She holds a BA in Economics with a concentration in International Relations from Clark University. Tami studied at the Ophelia DeVore School of Charm and the Fashion Institute of Technology, where she earned her Image Consultant Certification.

Tami Claytor

Etiquette Coach

Expert Answer

If you want to look more mature, wear clothes that fit properly. Stay away from baggy pants, and make sure your clothes are pressed and clean before you put them on. Also, don't wear a hat while you're indoors.
Question

Don't I need a classy, intelligent sense of humor?

Community Answer

That certainly helps! Keep it classy, though--don't laugh at crude or sexist jokes.